bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №142974
 12.07.2017
and
P.S. Stop the shit now. It humiliates you yourself.
Men, similarly watering the former, she is a fool, and so on. You picked it, did you choose it?
and
O. Grigoryev

I do not take my wife,
I will never abandon her.
She became bad with me.
I took it good.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142973
 12.07.2017
A woman should be taught the fact that if she does not appreciate and respect her husband, her husband's patience may end. And here, again, it is worth understanding that patience is often you start to experience before the birth.

I can’t understand one thing, guys. Why are you getting married at all? Well, a woman understands: if you want children, you need someone to feed you when the allowance ends, from 1.5 to 3 years of childhood. You don’t want the kids, what you talk about from all the bells. Marriage is a test of patience for you. Why?!! to

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №142972
 12.07.2017
Honestly speaking to you is someone who wants a family and is willing to do a lot for it. But any normal man wants to raise his children, not the ones you walk on the blades.

Are you looking for a family in general, how close are you to the grandmothers? You want to grow "your unregulated" - look for unchildren. True, after 30 the number of free and childless peers is decreasing, and you are talking about them "fi, non-liquid, old virgin". Go up to 20 years old. They don’t want you either? Don’t give up on the 35-40-year-old "papies"? "Fi, mercantile, they just need money (and I don’t have money)"? be calm. Either you will raise someone else’s child with your peer (and, if you show yourself a good husband, you will also be born your own), or you will not raise anyone. This is the arrangement. While you can expect miracles, they say, sometimes they happen.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142971
 12.07.2017
Today the seller in the store on the question about the availability of cigarettes cried out "Cigarettes do not sell, the school is nearby. Alcohol, and cigarettes cannot" of Russia.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №142970
 12.07.2017
Great comment, will be remembered forever: "Write correctly, MUDAK".

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №142969
 12.07.2017
Another woman with a trailer complains: there are no decent men!

Yes, and you confirmed it again.

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №142968
 12.07.2017
All of my acquaintances with divorces with a trailer became such by their own foolishness, although in words, of course, blame the former. And until women start to engage their brains in choosing partners, nothing will change.

And since the husband before the birth of the wife and the husband after the birth of the wife are different people, it is better in any case to either not give birth at all, or to have personal capital at hand that allows you to live these three years, or to consider yourself a fool-divorced-with-trailer in advance. The observation is not only mine, confirmed by almost all acquaintances of the female sex. The vector of change can be different, but more often in the bad direction. The power over whom there is no place to go is corrupt.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №142967
 12.07.2017
Recommendations for Fresh Mummy:

Cruz is good. He is 55, and looks and behaves like he is 54.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №142966
 12.07.2017
What was today...
At 8 a.m. a brief interview is scheduled. Eight in the morning on Thursday.
Interview in the park. In a summer cafe – I specifically offered this place so that the dogs could be nearby.
In addition, my appearance in the editorial board every Thursday is a sacred duty and can not be cancelled except by prior agreement with colleagues.
The interviewer did not appear at the specified time.
I call her and sensitively ask:
I’m here for half an hour, can you order coffee or tea?
Oh the fucking! I slept! It jumped out of my head, sorry. I am running! I fly!
Well, okay - I was stuck with a swollen face from sleep, the good is not very far away. They talked.
Late to work, of course. The editor is surprised.
Forgive me, I say. God sees, not by His own will, but by His own will.
I am surprised that you came.
And why?
You ought to do it on Thursday.
And today?
Today is Wednesday.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №142965
 12.07.2017
I was on the bus yesterday. We pass the bridge over the river. Someone screams, “Look at the dolphins!” The bus almost turned over, everyone rushed to look... Norilsk, 69th parallel, and the head involuntarily turns...

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №142964
 12.07.2017
On the wave of posts on the replacement of passports in 2001-2003.

I had such a story. I was young and stupid)) I will not write out the details, but the passportist required some certificate from me, but the certificates brought did not accept - then it is not the one, the other is not the other.

In the end, I had a bunch of small papers and so as not to get confused, I put them all in a simple white envelope and carried them in a bag.



On the next visit I approached her table, got a pack of paper from the envelope, and put the envelope on the edge of the table and began to stretch the certificate. To my surprise, she immediately took the certificate, saying that now the certificate is suitable. She took the old passport, issued all the papers, said when to come for a new passport and so on.



And when I was about to leave, I see my empty envelope carefully moved to the other end of the table and lying there closer to it. Without thought, I take this envelope, put my papers back there, the door opens, the next few people come in with some questions, and I leave the room.



And only later did I understand why they took my certificate so quickly and the envelope moved to the other end of the table. I imagine her face at the moment when I just pulled and picked up the envelope. I thought she was naeb@li))

I took a new passport without any problems from another aunt.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №142963
 12.07.2017
In the summer of 2010, we, weakened by the heat, suffocated by the smoke and the heat, prayed to God for rain. Seven years later, our prayers reached the address!

Comentary: Its total length is 7 light years from Earth

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №142962
 12.07.2017
xhh: they say, clay cooking cupcakes are a miracle as good. After a while, you can just pour a boiling water into them and get tea.
I use an ordinary cup on the same principle.

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №142961
 12.07.2017
The Russian language is mysterious. Olive oil is a taftology, and the hook is a tragedy.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №142960
 12.07.2017
About the idiots. I went to the store to buy a bowl of bread and stumbled upon a guard who did not let me into the shopping hall because: "No baskets can be done!
I speak to the guard that I only need one bowl of bread, I don’t need a basket for this, but the guard stood on his own: “No baskets!
Okay, fuck him, I look around to get the basket and I don’t see them, I say, “Sorry, but where can I get the basket?”
There is no basket. Please wait until they are released.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №142959
 12.07.2017
XX: We have no spirit of adventure.
YYY: Do you need such an unjustified adventure?
Real adventurers don’t ask for adventure :D

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №142958
 12.07.2017
A friend told me yesterday. He went somehow, let it be called Petya, to the store on his two-wheeled friend, and near the store stands a marginal personality of not a sober look of boomerang type and gathers for the next bottle. The acquaintance sometimes sponsors all the beggars with small things. He attached, therefore, the bicycle to the fence, threw a dozen to the fence, even in a joke said: the guards, say, the bicycle, so that no one would steal, and went to the store. He picked up products, bought them, and also met a friend — they talked, they went out, he approaches his iron horse, by his usual movement, he wants to free him from the clutches, as this beggar suddenly flies up with a scream: — Well, he left here! Petya for a couple of seconds fell into stupor from this development of events and asks - Why is this?

- Let no one else go, I say, the guard, I am one respected (! ) The man trusted! to protect him.

Peter’s intelligence, not to let go.

So I left it to you!

The Bohemians struck and looked — No, he was the only one, and you two — well, just an iron argument.

I met a friend in the store and we both went out. I threw you another ten rubles and told you to guard the bike.

Something in his memory began to clarify, but still with suspicion he asked:

Exactly you?

Yes to me, I.

And then he makes an epic phrase:

If so, I remembered you!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142957
 12.07.2017

he: spam came, offer a video game with thematic tags "simulator dating", "psychological horror"

The first realistic game

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №142956
 12.07.2017
Title on the news site
Priests will be fed with hallucinogenic mushrooms as part of scientific experiment

There is nothing to add...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142955
 12.07.2017
I borrow, outraged "divorce with a trailer":
Interestingly, such individuals have never been attended by the idea that the "divorce with a trailer" is due to such as him, the pederast? trailer itself is not born, and "divorce with trailer" is still those who are responsible for their children, feeds and drinks, after all, and yes, considering options of living together will take into account the interests of not only the divorce as such, but also its "trailer", because the man came and echoed, but "child" will not go anywhere, and feed, and drink, and then bear responsibility for it will have to again "divorce".

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