My mom and admin:

My son asks if we have hydrogen peroxide. I wonder why. He says, I have cut off. I ask: about what? About the cat...

You need to know the net before you post the balloons on the main.

What did you scratch?
About the cat.
K Chukovsky. From two to five. of 1928.

I: Let me tell you about the theory of vague numbers. A hundred grains is a bunch.
Brother is fucking!
What about two grains?
B is fucking!
I: You can’t, you’re thinking too unusual.
A million rubles is a lot!
I : Oh! A hundred rubles?
B is fucking!
And two rubles?
B is fucking!
I: No, you’re still thinking too unusual.

The Culinary Shop:
Can I have two pancakes?
You can, and what will you be?
Which are there?
- There is with drugs, with sugar... *half sweat*: there is with a whirlwind.
O_O

Comment on the video where mangosteen is beaten away from 4 young lions:
Mangosteen, the fox is a personality!

If you are as fat, you will not fit in the heart of a loved one.
One of the comments: And if you lose weight, fit, and then scratch again, it will hurt him very much.

From the requirements to the vacancy "Official Manager":
Always strict compliance with corporate norms and instructions, dress code "white top, true bottom", punctuality, friendly attitude to all customers and staff of the Company.

C 4PDA, discussing a secure smartphone:
XXX:Maybe 3310 and was not the benchmark of beauty, but by the untouchability will cross 5 such SATs :)
YYY: Lie in a 3310 shuffle with a broken screen, yes, there is something like this :)
ZZZ: You probably broke the other 3310?

Comments on the "appliance for remote onanism", in science "teledidonics"

The Appearance:
You can also take two of them and swallow each other.
Or on the whole company and play the game "guess who whispers".
Fuck the thought:

Whooves is:
To be honest, Tammy, you are like that.

XXX is fucking. So why do everyone think that all programmers are crazy? I am not that (
YYY: That’s not you talking to the battery yesterday?

The son plays at the computer, does not respond to external stimuli at all. Father passing by:
Sasha, your grandmother is calling you!! to
Son (melancholy, not breaking away from the screen):
The mine?
The Father (philosophically)
Well, if MY called you, it would be X@Evo.

Disputes about homosexuality and religion.

XXX: Then homosexuality is scientifically untrue! The simplest rule - opposite poles are attracted, the same - not! What else can we talk about?
Yyy: It turns out that gay love is much stronger if it overcomes the repulsive effect of single-value poles. O_O

You can buy a car for 15.
The question is why.
If this is the first car and you need to drive and not repair.

We guys want to buy a thousand for 15 to sit in the station, waiting for the electricity :lol:
Closed type

Pornography on the site. One girl breaks a laptop and a guy comes to her to “repair” it. Then everything as usual. Under the first comment:
What happened to the note?! to

About the killer!

Since I was a child, I was embarrassed by this phrase from fairy tales about milk rivers and jelly shores. What kind of beach will you drown on? These two fluids should be mixed immediately. Only recently realized that jelly as a solution of starch is a non-Newton liquid! That is, standing on such a shore, of course, can not, but to run quickly - very even possible. It remains only to calculate with what speed the milk must move in the river so that the banks and for it remain solid.

Hehey, chel, is a modern jelly - liquid. And in those times, when they invented this fairy tale, the jelly was ripped with spoonfuls and placed on a plate, such was the thick C:
I was embarrassed by this phrase as a child until my grandmother told me the truth.
Cheers to autumn, cat!

Frightener: found an ad in which instead of a secret buyer a mysterious X is required) now this image chases me)
by Irina (rofl)
He comes from nowhere and goes nowhere.
No one has seen his face.
Frightener: in a long black coat and a broadband hat :D
Irina: There are many legends about it, but which of them is true?)))
Meet in the shops of your city.
Irina: The Mysterious Buyer

"The Meeting
The Fugitive..."

This is what. We (a division of a large bank, a group predominantly female) once sent a training presentation intended to train the personnel of the Territorial Units. Its name was "Training TP". Very pleased )

Factories are workers! Land for the peasants!
The peasants are landowners! HDD

My uncle came to court. So he had a stroke, half-organism paralyzed, almost at all the horse did not move. Then it turned out that the public servants owe him 30 thousand. For example, a good agenda with flowers and a bad one with skull and bones.

So why did you, who burned the diode bridge, write about it?
I didn’t even know this song!
And now I still have many years to think about how he looks like, this Submarine Jopostar.
and :-(

I went to the insurance company to take a duplicate of the policy, a line of two ladies of the 50s, sitting what they do on the table. The village, then I realize that they are painting with pencils O_o. Natural: colored and colored pencil. It turned out, specifically so that the visitors did not miss, they put out entertainment. The Beautiful!