bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №70033
 15.09.2012
I was driving today on the Kadu, 140 in the left lane. The back catches the car and the semaforite with the far light to give up the road. I release, bypasses the Vasovsky fifth pick-up with a van... POST OF RUSSIA! You say they work badly. :)

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №70032
 15.09.2012
Favorite [20:39]: And I even have one thing that you throw into the water and evaporate your face :)
20:40 – Is it a wasteland?

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №70031
 15.09.2012
Tatiana (13:06:30 14/09/2012)
A man comes, I sit here alone, pulls a tail out of my wallet, shakes them in front of my mouth and says, “Colle, pass it over?”? to

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №70030
 15.09.2012
XX: You are ugly yourself! The Ahats are cute.
They also love me...
Oh! What I remembered...
One day the children asked me "What is it: teeth are, and not bites?".
I thought for a long time and answered – a land slug.

YYY: O.O

XXX: They are the same.
You know why?
Because the snails have 25,000 teeth in their mouths, and they have not yet attacked or bitten a single person.

I know how many teeth they have.

XX: I represent the headlines of the newspapers "Vineyard puppies gathered in a band of twenty puppies and attacked a man who walked out his dog. Man in resuscitation, details are being clarified".

YYY: HDDD

XH: I explained to them the same.
In the end, I am a fool, and the answer is a scratch.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70029
 15.09.2012
In the U.S. not publicity but civil position, openly and principally, and in Russia secretly and naked.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №70028
 15.09.2012
From corporate mail:
"Dear colleagues and colleagues Not those who know me as a software engineer, but in addition to that, I’m weighing 110 kg from my chest. I sit with a weight of 120 kg. And now attention to the question...who ate my borst?"

[ + 29 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70027
 15.09.2012
To seduce it seduced, that only the children can appear not only after sex, but also during the first knock on the door - need a spoon, the second - the elderly to drive out the big, the third - need to give a spoon, because there is nowhere to put it, the fourth - decided to ignore. They were rewarded with a long and stubborn call to the door.The fifth needed a big to the younger, they said to wait 10 minutes.The sixth knocked in 30 seconds and the announcement that he would wait here.The seventh..no, the seventh was not yet,so came a cat,settled near and began to scratch the flea furiously.The seventh announced the arrival of a small neighbor who wants to play with us.The eighth- called the aunt to ask how we were doing (contained to a car respondent).The ninth- car called the owner. And exactly half a second before the end of orgasm (yes, orgasm!) That, not the first day of marriage however) - The tenth." ten minutes passed. Let’s be big. Fast!"....there’s been four hours that my brain doesn’t leave the count for ten blacks (sorry, afroamerican babies)

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №70026
 15.09.2012
Cyrillus
XXX is oh! Today was a joke...
Talk to the child in the morning.
Tell the lion.
and Kaha.
“Lion, tell the tractor.
and tra!
A lion, say a crocodile.
and Mom!
Dad applauded and cried, and Mom thought about a plan for revenge

Demons
Well, why then when the monkey was shown in her shows, she screamed "Daddy!"

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №70025
 15.09.2012
From comments to the article on the first sexual experience:

Senya
As I remember now, I went to look for the girls in the shower, fell, lost consciousness, awoke - no longer a virgin.

That was I was.
Oh! And I remember how now – I get out of my soul, stumbled on someone’s lying leg, fell from above, struck something hard, awoke – no longer a virgin.

by Iya!! to
And then I fell, I quickly shrugged, and three others were preparing to fall from behind.

LIFE7
He went, stumbled on two people naked in the shower and broke his leg.

not me
Before entering the shower, I see two naked bodies in the switch and one with a broken leg, turned and left.

Rocky
He sat in the shower, did not touch anyone, filmed on the camera, then people began to stumble, and eventually filmed porn.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70024
 15.09.2012
Little after the kindergarten began to call his mother a rabbit-hopper, and he calls himself a frog-cowboy, and he calls me (his father) a rabbit, just a rabbit.

I went to my parents that day, and they were still the trolls. Now my son calls me an alcoholic rabbit!

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №70023
 15.09.2012
xxx: I’ve seen a couple of mints in the subway lately – one in armor and the other without. This type of one shoots and the other works as a shelter?
yyy: dd and tank
YYY: More Hillary should be in line
Zzz: The Wizard with a Beard

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №70022
 15.09.2012
I am surprised that in the State Duma are regularly held competitions for the most fucking law.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №70021
 15.09.2012
I'll send you a picture of a slick-pumped body, can you? Answer: In fact, she is pretty cute, really, the feeling will be that Kipelova is fucking after melting, but nothing, I love Arya since childhood
O_0

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №70020
 15.09.2012
There are all kinds of world days without smoking, without cars, without the internet... that is, of course, good, but we need a All-Russian Year Without Cigarettes for our officials.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №70019
 14.09.2012
Q: Have you not answered for a long time?
Smoking on the balcony.
Q: forty minutes?
I watched the fight.
Q: What is the fight?
Two people are fighting, fighting, fighting
HH: What is the wreck?
WOW, WOW, WOW and WOW...)

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №70018
 14.09.2012
Rubljovka is a district of sub-Moscow where people live who have not seen a single ruble for 20 years.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №70017
 14.09.2012
Tomorrow is Thursday?
M: No, it is Friday.
H : How? I even checked the schedule for Tuesday, so I didn’t go to the doctor!
Q: That is, you think that today is Wednesday, although it’s actually Thursday, you looked at the schedule for Tuesday and therefore didn’t go to the doctor?
and yes! and what? Oh...

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №70016
 14.09.2012
Friend - a man of the format 2x2, bald, in the skin and on BMW. It looks very brutal.
The phone was always given to him by his wife, he never bought it.
I came to buy a phone for the first time in my life, reports the seller.
The seller’s reaction – And it was picked up before, probably, right?? to

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70015
 14.09.2012
Funny: not everyone is watching TV, but everyone is disturbed by 12+, 16+ and so on. Burn up guys =)

[ + 47 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №70014
 14.09.2012
From Picaboo:
In the United States, a film was made that Islam is not a religion of peace and goodness. Islamists decided to prove the opposite by assaulting the U.S. embassy and killing four people.

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