bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №18874
 05.08.2009
We now have a good children’s playground.
“When we grew up, we had only a turnik, a sandbox, a large boiler, and a large iron puddle that we wanted for some reason.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №18873
 05.08.2009
Lying is more dependent than nicotine.
I want to smoke, but I don’t want to go for cigarettes.

[ + 76 - ] Comment quote №18872
 05.08.2009
XXX is
O_O
XXX is
Thirteen in the Forest
XXX is
Not a spy spy.
XXX is
He puts the swallow on the eye of the wood, this is not a swallowing swallow.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №18871
 05.08.2009
SeeleSchneider:*Status* Depression
XXX: What are you sad about?
SeeleSchneider: With a girl separated...
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
SeeleSchneider: In general, keep a brief correspondence...
Figo, he makes the coon. Girlfriend and I like it.

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №18870
 05.08.2009
On the radio "record" the host reads the coming sms:
I extend a greeting to all Vaza employees! I am very pleased to put the song of the group TATU "People with disabilities" to the public.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №18869
 05.08.2009
No other pedestrian has struck the car, yet the drivers are dissatisfied.
by Ilya Ilf

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №18868
 05.08.2009
I have tried everything in the world.
I will never fall so low.
To eat peelmen "My Family"
I don’t eat my family and relatives.

[ + 94 - ] Comment quote №18867
 05.08.2009
From the official forum Kaspersky:
Where can I send pirate keys to add them to the blacklist? I also want to report on a couple of sites that are constantly poured keys and various hackers to antivirus. I’ve tested some of them and I’ll tell you this is a dream for anyone who doesn’t want to pay for a license but wants to use your sad.gif product for free!
= = = is = is = is = is = is = is = is = is
This is Pidor.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №18866
 05.08.2009
festival Global East, Kiev, Ukraine (dough of steep foreign metal teams). On Sunday, after Epica’s performance, one of the organizers goes on stage and says:
- The Epica group decided to make a gift to the fans - autograph session. Only a big request: do not teach them to mother in Russian... Then yesterday the vocalist of Crematory Felix approaches me (they performed on Saturday) and pronounces: “Everything will be fine, fuck my cock.”

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №18865
 05.08.2009
I’m a stupid man, I’m drilling eggs.
I put the fork into it and it got a great mixer.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №18864
 05.08.2009
Do you want to be the first man? Drop it in the morning.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №18863
 05.08.2009
In the mid-1980s, Riga... Around our school was a bright red fence made of thick metal bars, three meters high. Each bar from the top ended with a sharp cone, climbing - a couple of tricks. Therefore, in order to walk unnoticed in the samovuls, we sprinkled them in the lower part.
He bowed, went out, put it in place - and everything was as it was. The command of the school regularly calculated and cooked these passages, and we continued to regularly spray them further. So our passages were migratory and other times, returning from the city, they could simply not be found. And then we had to start looking for new holes, hoping that the “brothers in arms” would worry about it. Why I am doing this, you will now understand.
This was before the New Year. The mood was raised, everyone was waiting for the celebration. And we have to tell you that in such days, pre-holiday, the activity of the students increased sharply, the number of self-fiber increased sharply and, in order to stop it somehow, walking guards were launched around the school: usually an officer (or senior) and 2-4 students.
So, on the 31st of December. Local time is around 22.00, the street is dark.
The door opens and into the location of our company, similar to a mourning, a procession (4 students: two on each side, in black shape, black shells and black hats) introduces an insensitive body and, going from behind, the officer asks: "Your?“Look at me,” he said, “Yes.” This shit didn’t bring us to a heart attack.” It turned out that "this fox," firmly putting somewhere, returned from the samovka and, due to its condition, could not find in the fence any passage. When trying to climb through the fence, she crashed, managed to cling to the barrel from behind with the collar of her shinella, a little slapped, tired and fell asleep.
Now imagine what the guards felt when they saw the body hanging at a height of 3 meters, swirling from the wind and already dusted with snow...
...c. They ran away – and he, the fucking, is also shrinking!
So they wore it all over the roots and wore it until we recognized it. This is the New Year’s story.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №18862
 05.08.2009
The black woman comes to the gynecologist, sat down in the chair, spread her legs.-the gynecologist stood her there and is silent, a minute silent the second.. the tenth.. then sharply beats the table with her hand - ALL, RESOLVED!- what is resolved? I take a black Porsche Cayenne with a red leather salon

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №18861
 05.08.2009
Sokol (17:42:20 4/08/2009)
The Bush tea?

Qoren (17:42:38 4/08/2009)
Coffee by Obama?

[ + 89 - ] Comment quote №18860
 05.08.2009
Lord the employers! Why don’t you want me to work? Admin girl is great! Unlike her, she is:
1) not smoking
Not drinking much (not drinking much)
Able to provide aesthetic pleasure at work
He will not be taken into the army.

In addition to:
1) City registration
Diploma of Higher Technical Education
2.5 years of experience in a similar position
4) No husband and children
5) learning anything at any time when pronouncing the magical formula "to immediately!"
6) Understand the words "need", "immediately" and the expression "I said what?and "

I am ready to write a receipt that I do not want and will not bring offspring for five years and tell you the instructions for contraceptive pills.

And remember it! The different structure of the sexual organ does not imply the presence of higher mental abilities!

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №18859
 05.08.2009
How to Ask a Question in the Forum
Pupok: Put a question mark after your phrase

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №18858
 05.08.2009
Here, all, probably, noticed in different television audiences, for example, says: "The most important in the state of the Middle Ages" and you need to put the word out of the letters "O L I K O R" and definitely someone will call and say: "Parliament!!" or even more terrible nonsense. So I have a question: how much for these calls are paid, and where can I arrange for such work?

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №18857
 05.08.2009
Those blondes...

Alia (06:19:53 3/08/2009) good morning
by Offline
August 13, 2009 at 1:16 am Why did you get up so early?
Alya (13:19:12 3/08/2009) and how did you know how long I woke up?? to

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №18856
 05.08.2009
The Sims 3 Girl.
She created herself a cute virtual man and began to build the house from scratch. The money was enough for the foundation, the walls, the booth, a couple of rooms, the fireplace and the unitary.
Now her sweetheart eats in the park what others have accomplished or failed to eat, washes in the shower of the water park, sleeps in the sun lounge near the pool of someone else's home.
Who would have thought that the Sims 3 is an elite simulator of the BOMJ :)

[ + 84 - ] Comment quote №18855
 05.08.2009
Today my son (5 years old) said that mosquitoes can feel blood at a distance of 50 meters, regardless of the clothes on a person, etc.
I, sock, admin at the age of 37 years, with a "high" and life experience holy thought that if you hide your head under the blanket then the mosquito will not find you!!!! to

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