bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №91305
 18.12.2013
Do you want to visit the "Clitor" Shopping Centre? Visit to B-r Dmitry Donsky. There it is written: TC "Clitor". During the day it is harmless cliffstar)

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №91304
 18.12.2013
XX: And now listen to the story of human stupidity. In our factory, before making a detail, a model is created. It is no different from the original model (even painted in the same color to reveal if there will be marriage painting), only made of wood.
So here. On Monday, a batch of such models instead of moving to the next workshop, for some reason was delivered to the control department. They were checked there!!! sent to the warehouse. The warehouses are also not embarrassed that the details are too light and have a different invoice. They handed them over to the cargo. They were loaded and sent to customers.

But that is not all. On that side the details were unloaded, checked (!!!) They are handed over to the workers so that they can be inserted into the general mechanism. And they almost put it in!!But at some point, something happened, or it broke. And the batch of details returned to us with the tag: "Factory marriage". Party of the Tree!! The marriage!! to

I don’t even know who is the bigger fool.

XX: I was a bigger debil, the head of the transportation department, because my car delivered poor quality goods to customers. Next time I’ll check the details personally.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №91303
 18.12.2013
xxx: Gentlemen, and nobody here does not cultivate indoor plants?
Yyy: Well, if "I water them, and they still die" is considered - then I am in this big doc

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №91302
 18.12.2013
Ukraine is thinking about joining the EU, Britain is thinking about leaving it.
The European Union is slowly moving eastward.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №91301
 18.12.2013
This is:
DrRein: I was in a wagon with a man looking at Dexter’s tablet. He pushed me, stood on my feet and did not let me out of the car. In the turn on the escalator, he also did not miss and blinked something like "where to climb", although there was a doher of space in front of him.
He told him that the Trinity would kill Rita at the end of the season.
Good luck to fuck.

What I did to you, don’t do it.( by

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №91300
 18.12.2013
zzz: Please move my post from the dog topic to the grandmother’s. The window is wrong.
You are late, Daddy. You have been struck there and there.

[ + 33 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91299
 18.12.2013
God, when did dogs and cats become more important to you than people?

When – I don’t know, but where can I say.
There is a documentary series - Natives in England, there natives from French Polynesia came to England. They went to a hairdresser for animals. They looked at. After a while, later, they saw the bombardment and asked, “Who is this?” They explain that this person does not have a home and lives on the street (and the European winter on the street). The locals asked: How is it? The man has no home and he eats what he gets, and the dogs have a hairdresser. Why so?
There was no answer.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №91298
 18.12.2013
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
We’ve been with you for a long time, so I decided.
I think you will understand me.
WOW : What?? to
Q: I have a constipation, do you know anything (other than laxative)?
Wow, that’s what you’ve just written that helps a lot...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №91297
 18.12.2013
Is this "alcohol problems"?
Broken stool - this is the problem with alcohol!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №91296
 18.12.2013
Q: What would you like the most in the NH?
In order for the grandfather to come in a red shirt, he took away the narrow jeans from everyone and gave them wide.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №91295
 18.12.2013
Q: You are angry.
I don’t write anything.
HH: This is exactly
Let me call you?
HH: Not so much

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91294
 18.12.2013
You can’t kill a turtle with this arrow.
Yyy: You will be surprised, but turtles are hunted without a bow.
Zzz: In Russia, the turtles were used to go with nunchaks.

[ + -10 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91293
 18.12.2013
urgently! Emergency news release! Today, in the city of Mukhosransk, during the squad in honor of the Olympic fire, a small dog was thrown onto a torch bearer without a hammer and a lead! The torch carrier fell and burned, and in the meantime the dog began to rape the athlete's leg with ananas at the causal spot! The city's residents are divided into two fronts: some defend the dog, others sympathize with the athlete. The employees of the Russian Post refuse to comment, and it is understandable! They learned about the incident ten days later. But it was established that it was the Russian Post that delivered a bowl with pineapples to the owner of the dog. The owner of the dog escaped from the scene with a bank of canned pineapples. Investigation is underway.

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91292
 18.12.2013
This morning I saw the top of the art of merchandising in the supermarket! They lie on the bench of sausages in the paste, laid out with a high hill, and look at the buyer with their tips, and you can see how from each culinary product of 2-3 centimeters the sausage rises. Oh, I think, great, the test is little, the sauces are big! I approach, take, and they, it turns out, inside the test moved in one direction! and Tanya! They moved every sausage inside the paste to make it appear more attractive!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №91291
 18.12.2013
Tretyakov told reporters that, despite all regret, he does not admit himself guilty:

"There was an interpersonal conflict between me and the crewman, which arose on the basis of using the toilet in the front of the cabin. I drank three cocktails. Per because I observe the post, it worked somehow too strongly.”

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №91290
 18.12.2013
Q: How are you with this boy?
W: W W W W W
X: O_O
W: Fuck, I meant it in parallel to me :)))

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91289
 18.12.2013
This is:

The Saviour
commentary

Now is the time to break the iron door to the studio!

The iron door is carried out in 90 seconds maximum. It is normative. Without the slightest noise.
The Saviour.
_________________________________________________________
And the iron armored door with a diameter of 2 cm in diameter in all 4 directions, you also break in 90 seconds? Even without noise?

___________________________________________________________________________

The real case with us in the shelter was the case: the guards, smoking, closed the shelter 2 hours earlier than required. A company of students who could not get home called the firefighters, somehow proving that there was a fire in the building. The result - a metal door, breaking out on the outside + a metal grille on the barrier lock right behind the door were "inserted" into the building from one corner... The eyes of the smoked guards had to be seen!!! to

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №91288
 18.12.2013
No, is this normal?
I come from the store, checking out the products from the packages. The father comes in, grumbling, putting his hands forward, and with his eyes opened, he says, “Bato-o-o-o-on! Crush-and-and-it!" He breaks off half the button and runs away...

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №91287
 18.12.2013
xxx: I was told by a friend here that if you take one smiley, well or there is a clamp)) - it's like you don't want to communicate and send the interlocutor to the fuck
YYYY : )
and zzz :)
QQQ : )

[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91286
 18.12.2013
Xxx: stood in a dish. I put off her washing. Others washed, and for some reason left it for later. There was some rubbish from another dish. And here I see something vertically rolling up from it. of the water in it. I looked at it, and it was a roast! I don't know what seed there grew, but the germ stretches to the edge of the shell. Length is 6 centimeters.
Tomatoes are the future.
Transplanted into a pot to a dead cactus. Polish

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