From Twitter:
Water has 4 aggregate states: liquid, solid, gas and watermelon.

After this terrible, snowy, cold winter and a dull-killing summer, next year I want to have no weather. SPB

Yesterday in the news showed how Medvedev after inspecting the burned fields of our region said: "There will be a resolution..."
There was a heavy rain tonight.

fish ‎(11:50)
Today, my sister and I discussed the increased probability of the situation.
When you come to the gynecologist, and there is Putin!!!! to
andie ‎(11:55):
And imagine: the gynecologist is looking - and there is Putin too!!! to

Are you okay with your vestibular apparatus?
Apparently yes, and what?
I fuck you all...

Commentary on a girl's photo
He: as always the look ruins this grid, our... grid
It's not a net, it's a shirt
Then we put on the coat.
She: Well, it’s too vulgar to take pictures of cowards.
He said, “We are cowards.

XXX is:
C is part. and comforts.
YYY :
Is it how?
XXX is:
Toilet down from the balcony :)
XXX is:
Shower – standing under someone else’s toilet.

null: and my grandmother had a rocket vacuum cleaner.
Null: It was called so because of the sound.
Null: We just got a cat out of it.
But we still have a rocket.
Null: Don’t you meet there? and :)
We have no one :)
SIV: Neighbors of Sruca

Riv_Shirl: what a kid he is
Riv_Shirl: Yes, and the baby too

A: Where do you get the 88 Tyres?! to
C: (flegmatic) Well, you need dark socks first.
A: Am I a pedicure for you?! to
C: Of course not excluded... but I am generally talking about theft...

ArkDoom: Smoking Warns: The Ministry of Health is Yabeda.

Thirteen (23:36) :
Throw smoke

Dmitry (23:36) :
? to

Thirteen (23:36) :
I go to the bathroom today and there is a spider!! to

Thirteen (23:36) :
and Healthy!

Thirteen (23:37) :
Do you know which?? to

I have to tell you... (23:38) :
From here to here, here to here.

X: Girls refuse to do minettes for many reasons, such as being upset. But then they do it themselves with pleasure.
W: Oh, I didn’t like Pelmen before either.

From Habr:
I will tell you how radio stores are organized in China.
You come, there is a bunch of different phones al-la iPhones, htc and so on. It is just the sea...
There are decent fake iPhones (with a high-quality screen, touchscreen, TV tuner, two sims, etc., but they can really be used!) We have about 7 trillion dollars.
Another joke - approached the seller, showed the HTC MAX 4G (which is only in Russia) - and asked the same, he turned and turned, and said "Sir, we don't have that, but if you give it to us for a week - we will do."
- need to show them the fighter Su-35 ;) the podi in a month will make a copy.

I came to work, as always at 7-45, standing with the boys we smoke on the parking lot..Here, at speed, the Jaguar XKR comes in and parks to the director's seat (the director's "Kamruha"), the music is full. The doors open, and because of the steering wheel, literally falls out, our trucker, Serega (the guy has 15 thousand salary)...stays up such, shaking, shaking, the car closes not on the signal, but on the key.
Then, in his face, there is a thought... the look becomes frightened, he turns to the car... then he looks at us again (the horror is already read in his eyes), and he gives out.
-Bl@, god I don't know where it came from... And shaking goes to the warehouse.

My husband and I smoked for a long time and thought a lot.

Crocodaill: Ludmila Patkovna, and how do you look at us with you?
Crocodile: a cup of drink
Ludwig Aristarchovich: Depending on where, with whom and who will do it...
Ludwig Aristarchovich: I know you, I don’t think you meant the invitation to drink it outside of working hours, in a more romantic setting, rather it is a subtle hint with a literal translation of “Go into the kitchen and pour me tea!” I think I’m going to..."
Crocodaill: Scuco burned

J is
Yobtly

Sh
It is hot. Yippidy

From the hubro, discussing the automation of public toilets

If you turn off the lights in the toilet when someone is there, then within a second the “ei” will sound from the inside.
YYY: What if there is someone very shy there?
XXX: A shameful cough?
yyy: It must be a very loud shy cough. Preferably, with a shy comment "Who am I shy of coughing here, fucking?"

Wawooo
What kind of cabbage I bought ?

Wawooo
I archive, I send

Light Wolf
As a direct smoke.

Wawooo
Does he also eat strawberries?

Light Wolf
He sends everything in pictures.

Wawooo
It will soon be written in Egyptian - bird bird crab river

yyy (16.02.2010 17:30)
I have never seen your feet.

xxx (16.02.2010 17:30)
Why is? Have I ever been without them?