bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №85085
 02.08.2013
In Soviet times in Sverdlovsk (now Yekaterinburg)
> closed the drinking house and not in the context of the fight against alcoholism,
> it was on the pebble that the monument of Y.M. pointed his finger. Sverdlov

In the suburb of Balashige, a monument to Lenin pointed to the pebble.
It was easier to turn the monument.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №85084
 02.08.2013
The Fishing Forum:

1: Asked to give an announcement on the sale of a fully working computer.
The body. Owned by: 0XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
I will publish some parameters later.

2: Asked to answer that they agree to buy for some amount of hryvnia in full demand on the market. I will tell you later for what amount of money.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №85083
 02.08.2013
From Khabr (talk about the South)
Vvzvlad: I represent it. During that time, I have not seen a single spider. The Cheddar? Night walks with the phone included.
Phoenixweiss: Maybe you are a happy person with good karma and pure aura.
IDMan: Or with such karma, the rumors of which scare even the hippies.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №85082
 02.08.2013
Talk about a local hotel.

xxx: About "Spartacus"." Rested" there three years ago
At night at the same time, mice began to cross across the walls and under the floor. The worshipers!
I left bread on the table. Some mutant bite a hole in the bucket with a thick fist.
He went to the admin, saying that we are afraid for our lives.
She says we have a type of luxury, so there is a solution from mice
It gives a fat cat.
Bringed him to the room, he slept on my head all night, but the rest of the life clearly woke up.)
I really slept with him.

So if you are booking “Spartak”, take a luxury! Cats are included in the account.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85081
 02.08.2013
With Lepra:

orange303: I have one question. I have always thought that cyclists are listening to Iron Maiden, or, at the bad end, ZZ Top, and from the mozzicks is constantly playing some kind of pork bluff of the type of Stas Mikhailov.
b_twisted: Look from the other side. Zizitop is such a stance of Mikhail for America of the 70s. Everything seems to go together.
Pinstripe: You know, this phrase very well shows how the United States differs from Russia. In the 1970s they had ZZ Top as Stas Mikhailov, and in 2013 we had Stas Mikhailov as Stas Mikhailov.


[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №85080
 02.08.2013
In the day of wrath:
One day your phone will be called, and a girl from Kirby's beauty salon. A nice voice will tell you that a friend you have long forgotten is still keeping your phone number!

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №85079
 02.08.2013
Yes, any fool can fail. But to fail on trailers... Mikhalkov managed.

[ + 22 - ] [6 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85078
 02.08.2013
to this:
For example: "The head of Rospotrebnadzor Onishchenko spoke with another misulin, urging Russians to abandon sushi, as genetically incompatible food"

Sorry, but Onishchenko and himself is already quite blatant, so the example is not too good :)

[ + 18 - ] [7 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85077
 02.08.2013
I’ll reveal the secret to the boys.
A woman is first attracted to the mind of a man, and then she falls in love with his body.
If instead of "How long have you been having sex and what poses do you love?" you ask "What book has turned your life and do you like to travel?" the chances will increase. Well if not for sex, then at least for normal communication.
And don’t believe the myth that single women over 30 give in to the first encounter.
I am an adult, smart, beautiful woman and as a partner I see no less worthy man.
You have, youth


[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №85076
 02.08.2013
Here is this:

"Fuck hatred has begun to shut down websites. Who are these fucking people? Who fucking passed the law? I didn’t vote for those people, who are they?and "

It is ===

It may even happen that the lost struggle with unfair elections is not only meme 146%, demotivators with Churov and funny videos on the network, but also blocked sites, Pugachev, "the damage from the devaluation of the ruble will not be" and so on.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №85075
 02.08.2013
Title of News:
Website with the register of "pirate" resources is working with interruptions

The Stone:
In the course of UTorrent on the server simply block the channel.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №85074
 02.08.2013
Zellman is Azazazza. I received a notification yesterday that the headphones had arrived. I sent them back to the mail today. The storage period has expired. I was fucked in the mouth of the fucking postmen of Russia. Ears sent back 28, notification brought back 30. Fuck it? Take it up!
ZellmaN: The branch of hell on earth
Tagged with: (rofl)
Tagged: gaiaga
ZellmaN: I just wept when she came back with a notification and said they were sent back.
ZellmaN: Say to me, go fucking to the postman

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85073
 02.08.2013
News on Rambler: "Adobe forgiven all users of pirated software in Russia"
My husband’s comment: "Oh, and I just downloaded photoshop today!"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №85072
 02.08.2013
The more laws are adopted, the more lawlessness in a country.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №85071
 02.08.2013
Ask the sky.

It was three years ago in the mountain steppes of Hangzhou. Our small and unscientific expedition was slowly advancing on the terrible Mongolian roads, crawling in mud, forcing rivers, and lavishing between rocks and countless flocks of domestic animals.
One of us, Igor, was a nominee on this hot July day. Since the pre-starter campaign, a bottle of good whiskey was hidden in Deuti-Free, which was hardly, but managed to keep until the birthday. Whiskey was terribly warm, and even the wonderful views of Mongolian untouched nature could not improve its taste. We needed ice.
It is almost impossible to get it in Mongolia outside the cities, and the number of cities is disappearing small and the distances between them are calculated by several hundred kilometers. There was no city on our way that day. Asking for ice in nomadic settlements and even in small villages, which are hit 2-3 times a day, is useless - they do not have refrigerators. Meat is usually stored in the most reliable way – inside its own skin – and pasted nearby until it is needed. Fresh milk is also always at hand, and the rest of the fast-food Mongols do not eat at all, so historically it has been. Dirty attempts to ask for ice in the opposite jurts and small points of the catering ended in the same way – with a confused smile and the hands of the owners spread to the side. Birthday slowly climbed towards sunset.
The last chance was to seek the help of the higher forces. The religious affiliation of Igor and me was unclear to us, so to whom to pray was unclear. Eventually I suggested to him to turn to Huh Munh Tengri, the Eternal Blue Sky, the supreme god of the Mongolian animists, since we are in the territory under his control. Igor accepted the idea with a proper skeptical smile, but there was no alternative, and he performed the miserable resemblance of the rite of appeal to Heaven (fortunately, no Mongolian shaman saw this "ritual"). It was only to wait and hope that suddenly, from anywhere in the middle of the steppe, a refrigerator connected to the solar battery will appear, bound with a tape "Igor from Hueh Munch Tengry with the best wishes", the freezer of which will be filled with fine pieces of ice in the form of a glass for whisky.
The sky ordered differently. Half an hour later, heavy clouds blinked on his clear blue face, and lightning shone in the distance. We were already going to tie the bottle with a towel and hang it out of the window, where it will be soaked in the rain and cooled by evaporating water at speed (an ancient method of cooling drinks in the train, developed by the Soviet travelers), but nobody dared take such a responsibility. The roads there are grounded, crumbling and rocky (three or four asphalted in Mongolia), and the crumbly tied bottle will inevitably fall and break, and it will be alone.
And when the thunderstorm went beyond the nearest mountain chain, we had to climb the crossing. Even from the bottom we noticed that the passage of some strange gray color, very unusual for the summer Mongolian landscape. And only when we got there, we realized that Heaven had taken up our prayers. The past thunderstorm has poured out a considerable amount of its moisture on the passage, and not in a liquid, but in a solid aggregate state! A piece of Mongolia with a radius of about one-and-a-half to two kilometers was covered by a rough white carpet of fairly hanging gardens. If we were here half an hour later – and our car would be damaged considerably. But the wise Heaven did only what was asked of him. And in ten minutes we drank whiskey with grass for Igor's health, and I give my head to the cut that the best ice I've never tried in my life. Since then, when filling out the questionnaires in the “religion” column, we both indicate “Tengrianism.”

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №85070
 02.08.2013
On cigarette packs should be written not "Smoking kills", but "Happy people do not smoke." That’s what I understand, that’s the motivation, that’s the reason to think.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №85069
 02.08.2013
Talk about aquarists and alpinism
xxx: Yes, there I am scared too))) My fate - discovery on television)))
YYY: I get fat from discovery on TV. I cannot)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №85068
 02.08.2013
He lay down to rest and fell asleep. He never rested.
c) my grandfather

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №85067
 02.08.2013
How can I sleep with a broken heart?
Sleep on the side

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №85066
 02.08.2013
xxx> oh how hard I've gotten
yyy> Kazak Mikifor, what is it?
xxx> I sit on the toilet, tired after work. I cut off the endings. Suddenly I look at the brush: YEPST!!!! My fingers are different in length!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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