bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №115673
 04.07.2015
There is no creative, engineering approach! When I heard that the bubbles would become stronger, I immediately thought: what if they were pressed with passages?

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115672
 04.07.2015
Summer and heat. The cat slowly clamps to the cold battery.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №115671
 04.07.2015
From a computer forum:
Previously I lived in the village and crossed the road where I wanted, and now moved to the city and here everywhere some incomprehensible lights and I am afraid to cross the road where I got. Is it possible to remove the lights and make it like in the village? This is what you are asking."

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №115670
 04.07.2015
Dear women, mothers and future mothers! It is your responsibility to educate future men. Let the world become a little less "cats" - let's raise it right. Now women work as well as men (with the rare exception of really hard work, but this is, again, a rarity), they have the same working day, too tired. So let’s learn that helping a woman is not a shame and a woman should not put all the homework on her. Let from childhood help mom somewhere to clean up, cook something, basically wash the dishes. No, I’m not suggesting raising a "chip". I propose to teach you to appreciate the work of others – stop growing the cattle lying on the couch after a hard day of work. And stop raising men in the type of "high defense, you don’t have to do anything else ". They grow up and think that ‘baby’ owes them only their existence. You complain about men, but the same goats grow year after year.

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115669
 04.07.2015
to this
I understand that creating smart things is a modern trend, but life hasn’t prepared me for SMART VAGINAL CHARICS.
___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

And if they were to be released by Apple, they would be called simply: "A-a-ai"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №115668
 04.07.2015
I am okay, why are you not sleeping?
Tagged: drunk
XXX: Have you eaten?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
XXX is too much.
YYY: Well, here the regime is broken)
Eat, pine, regime... where are you now?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №115667
 04.07.2015
I, having a high moral appearance, in a rough form refused to her and left home. How good I am. He did everything right. Why am I ashamed of remembering this case and still feeling shit?
____________________________
You are a good man! I speak seriously. Really worthy of respect.
I speak as a woman who has visited... well, not quite in such but similar situations, not only as a drunken lady, but also as a witness.

And you feel bad, because you were much more drunk than her, and, in general, if sex had taken place, it would be you who (whose condition) had taken advantage of.

[ + 20 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115666
 04.07.2015
A few months ago, the birthday of a dear cousin. The sister of the Kumma, a little subdued, but not to the state of "soopley," and so, a couple of small bubbles from the nose, asked me, blue, like a drow, to take her home. I moved with difficulty, but I drive a bucha motorcycle much better than a sober (this is a very strong spell, don't try to repeat it). Luckily, the benefit of only 10 kilometers on the deserted track. Along the way, she began to admire the speed and unobtrusively catch me for the sexual fucking. Then he invited me to come and drink wine. In the process, she poured the same wine into the jeans, removed them and remained in strings. Then she used to kiss and cheer something about long-hidden feelings. I, having a high moral appearance, in a rough form refused to her and left home. How good I am. He did everything right. Why am I ashamed of remembering this case and still feeling shit?

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115665
 04.07.2015
The Wise.
==== is
Shit it!
Not all men are goats, fools and rapists.
Not all women are hysterical.
3) who disagrees with paragraph 1 and hysterical
Whoever disagrees with p.2 is a fool.
I have everything!
==== is
What about cats.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №115664
 04.07.2015
xxx: You turn off AdBlock to support your favorite site, and they advertise you for mining lessons.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №115663
 04.07.2015
Once I left the office, and on the monitor of my computer a colleague attached an invitation to a conference. For 15 minutes I tried to close it with the mouse, almost calling the technical support service about the insidious virus. Then the paper did not stand and collapsed.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №115662
 04.07.2015
After the phrases "both my boyfriend (with one I live, with the second I sometimes meet)", "I am closer to a free relationship", "confidence he wants. We are different, we are 5% and we are not like everyone else and I want to shake my head thoughtfully and say Barrymore’s voice: “Pydoras, sir!”

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №115661
 04.07.2015
When Russians and Italians speak English, somewhere an Englishman dies of laughter.

[ + 23 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №115660
 04.07.2015
How much to drink to avoid resistance.

Dear girls, if you do not drink at all or drink little, and you are persuaded to drink to have fun and relax in the company... Just remember: after the first swallow your condition changes. Everything seems simpler, clearer, brighter and lighter, you are easier to support any initiative. Of course, I want to extend and enhance this beautiful feeling. It seems to you that alcohol does not affect you in any way, just around beautiful people who want only good.
This is a sign that you have enough. Don’t explain it to anyone, just oh, something went wrong with me. After a while, the alcohol will exhaust and you will begin to judge the situation again.

Dear young people, it is exactly the same for you.
And if the lack of touch after the glass suddenly started to smile to you, the eyes glittered and the voice became whirling, there is nothing good about it. She just started to lose thought. Yes, he still stands on his feet, and like something he wants, but this "self-desire" in a hammer can turn into at least an insult, at most - a history for many years.

At a snack, remember how a real officer behaves when a drunk woman hangs on him:
Stirlitz, immediately swear that you love me!
So that I die. Write a couple of formulas.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №115659
 04.07.2015
From the discussion of the news about the fact that Russian tourists did not leave Tunisia after the terrorist attack:
Anton, in the 90s there was a lot of interesting. For example, in 91, my brother and I pulled a 20kg ruby TV from the town hall building (during the coup)....and god be, the sniper’s bullet broke a hole in it.))) So we only lived for the TV.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №115658
 04.07.2015
The barbaric times when sausages were made from animals have passed.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №115657
 04.07.2015
History of life. Guides during the excursion:
“And now we’re going through that big wall and you’ll see the area where everyone has stopped drinking and smoking.
We have revived. I walked to the bus windows. The wall ended and we saw a huge city cemetery.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №115656
 04.07.2015
A Tale of Dacia. I am 7 years old. Oh wow! My grandmother and I are finally going to the house! 14 years. Our ancestors got their beds. I am 20. It seems that the grandmother has gone crazy, all day grass, well on the beds, and the grass along the fence who hindered? I am 25. It is only needed for shakes. 35 is Should I have redisks? 45 is The whole garden in beds. 60 is Something the fence of grass has grown, you need to splash. and 78. I take a heavy backpack to the country, the grandchildren don't help, they say - you don't need to sow anything, we buy everything. And only the grandson is happy, he is 7 years old, and he is happy that it is summer again, and we are going to the country. The life continues.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №115655
 04.07.2015
This is without consent! Was there consent? It was! It is not rape. What she changed in the morning was her personal cockroaches.
............

A guy locks a girl in a room without food and water, on the 9th floor, and says - until we sleep - I won't let go. On the fifth day, she agreed. Was there consent? It was!

The neighbor says, “Either you are the same with me, or I will rape your daughter. He agrees with fear. Was there consent? It was!

The guy poured a beer into the girl's drug, and then as if she consented (although she herself does not remember, and the only witness to the consent is the guy himself). Was there consent? It was!

A guy is arranged as a sanitary in an internship for adults with mental retardation, in a women's department... well, they agree, who is for a candy, and who doesn't understand what she is asking now and what she agrees to. Was there consent? It was!

An uncle complains to a 5-year-old girl that he has a wound in a very difficult place and asks to help heal - kiss at least. Was there consent? It was!

It’s strange just why the prosecutor in all these cases doesn’t want to agree with the concept "The consent was? It was"

Even more strange, why notary will not certify the contract of sale of housing, if one of the parties "in wood"...

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №115654
 04.07.2015
Please do instead of "I want more" - "I want to be funny"

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