bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №140673
 20.04.2017
The more churches, the more flat the earth becomes.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №140672
 20.04.2017
I give certificate
# # # #
As a man who graduated from school in 92 with a medal, university in 97 with a red diploma, passed Abkhazia, Chechnya
# # # #
The war in Abkhazia was in 1993, Chechnya 1994-1996, the second 1999-2000.
Studying and fighting at the same time?
Peace, door, ball, as I call it.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №140671
 20.04.2017
From VK:
Zhirinovsky suggested not to disclose the incomes of deputies in order to "not irritate the people". He says the government knows “who steals and who should be arrested.”

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №140670
 20.04.2017
There is communication about various diets and food plans.
I know only two types of meat that don’t have antibiotics and growth hormones.
Dinosaur and Mammoth? xd

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №140669
 20.04.2017
vvv: Topkor jot: they in the Russian version e-mail is called "Electronic mail".
ddd is fucking))
PVV: The electronic mail. The Tesla Postal...

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №140668
 20.04.2017
The existential soap. You can simply place a plastic bubble in the center of the soap, by the end of the soap, the remnants are washed off and it is thrown away. And if everything is calculated correctly, soap will also swim.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №140667
 20.04.2017
My neighbor makes stone-age tools using stone-age technology - this is where hardcore.

Make him stop! Fifty centuries from now, by its stick and stone tails, future archaeologists will judge the level of technology of the 21st century!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №140666
 20.04.2017
Bhutan, what am I doing wrong? It seemed like it was all on my grandmother’s recipe, but it still turned out to be a lie.
WOW: Grandma serves the gods of the north and knows many ancient mysteries, you will not compare with her skill
Say that our grandmother is Lord Sith, that’s why her cakes are so delicious.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №140665
 20.04.2017
Watching football and porn is similar in that we worry about things we don’t participate in, although we’re sure we’d do it much better.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №140664
 19.04.2017
Discussions of the new film of Shakhnazarov "Anna Karenina".
The Witch:
- They said that the director did not strictly film the novel, there was added another story.
The testimony is dark:
and mu.
The wife picked up:
At the end of the film, Gerasim drops Karenina in a pond, so as not to spend on shooting the steam car.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №140663
 19.04.2017
The 1C
HeKrendel: The big four stakes on 1s nick in the 12th year on the MSF were about 8k thousand per hour
Novikov: And what is interesting: they can provide advisory services in general on any topic. They have no limitations – the main thing is to invite them. I am especially pleased to see how they turn out, if they have no experience in the subject at all - they start to conduct interviews. Thus e. You tell them for your money, and not small, as everything is arranged. They all record and leave. They disappear somewhere for a while, roam in their bases around the world - what they have. It would be good if there was something true. If there is nothing there - the resalt will be just he..nothing on lean oil. This is very convenient for an employed manager. He is not in any case to blame - if it goes well, then he writes to himself in plus. If they don’t succeed, they’ll say, it’s not me, it’s them. You are as clean. There is an opinion that they are invited for this – to remove any responsibility for the end result.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №140662
 19.04.2017
EvLaUy> I don’t understand anything. Why did this topic suddenly appear? Is there information that after the year, the TS still passes cases and is waiting for advice?

This is the style of the membrane Yuri Obusikov - the last time he gave advice on the topic 13 years later, now - a year later. The dynamics inspire hope :)

Dmitry V. Liseev> Man for 13 years thought about fasting. well well. Nowadays, many people go online without thinking.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №140661
 19.04.2017
[21:12] xxx: I look at your stelaris
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[0:06] xxx: Ambassadors how to make a transport ship
2:29 xxx: the fuck is too long
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx I have to take that shit.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №140660
 19.04.2017
XX: I’m wondering if I can’t take the helmet of ritual reality.
Did you mean virtual?
XXX is wanted. But now it seems more meaningful.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №140659
 19.04.2017
About my work in the city administration:

The chief is higher, which receives a thousand pounds of 150 pounds. Preparing a meeting. Schemes, photos and detailed text. You need to remove a person’s tooth. Photo of a person, photo of a tooth. We will open his mouth (the scheme), insert an anesthetic (the painting), shake his tooth and pull out. The command remains only to say "Yes, so do". But it is not always so. Sometimes it happens: “Here are citizens asking for teeth to be removed through the ass so that the cancer patient goes ahead.” And you are looking for a clinic where there are dentists-proctologists and will take for 100 rubles (because the budget is cheap tooth removal through the mouth) to remove the tooth through the ass. And to argue with the boss can not, even arguably, he better know how to remove teeth. And when the patient after the procedure writes a complaint about pain in the ass, it is the fault of the performer, that is, me.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №140658
 19.04.2017
A friend went to work in another company.
He wrote on Skype on the first day:
"The money is there.
I got 3!! Pins and Stickers :)
It is completely new!"

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №140657
 19.04.2017
I have eaten fish.
Good appetite to you and happy way to the fish.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №140656
 19.04.2017
From a conversation about one "free"mmorpg with a friend:
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh These things from the store for the amount that I can eat well for 2 weeks, I buy not forever for my character, but only for a month?
YYY: In general, yes, in many Chinese grinds so, and what’s unusual about this?
xxx: well, if the developer takes his things back at the end of the month, then let him give back my money that I gave for those things: I looked at his things on his character, he looked at my money on his account, now you can change back. That would be fair.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №140655
 19.04.2017
Yesterday was DTP.
XXX: The Front
XXX: Two trains
XXX: I have everything

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №140654
 19.04.2017
1: In general, I think, since this is a children’s institution, it could be done to protect children at the exit. My son went out and no one noticed him.
How do you imagine this protection? Invisible rays at 120 cm. If someone goes down, is there an alarm? What if the dwarf gets pregnant?
1: Eem... I meant a two-sided button, like the usual in dentistry. But, of course, a laser grid that tears dwarfs into pieces is much more effective.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna