In Novosibirsk, they removed stickers with the inscription "For Russia without scammers and thieves".
In the act of inspection it is written that the violation is an agitation against "United Russia".

President of the State Duma Volodin said that there is a hole in the budget, so Russians will have to do without state pensions. Or is it better for us to do without the State Duma and its president?

In the weakened kingdom, there are far more eaten than satiated.

In my family 4 children.
I am the oldest.
My mother and I had this conversation:
When did you decide you want children?
That moment in my life has not yet come.
...
Mother of the Year

I don’t understand why iPhone owners don’t like those with Android. What do people without loans do to you?

There was an interesting young man in our class, a second-year-old - Eldar. He made a hole inside the pocket of the pants, pushed his reproductive organ there from the inside and offered the girls to smell something interesting in the pocket. The whistleblower quickly flew through the school. Ella Albertovna, a tough woman, soon arrived at the scene of the accident and, without words, put her hand in Eldar's pocket, but did not pull back. Ladies with many years of pedagogical experience strongly compressed the subject. She dragged him to the end to the head of the educational department. In the mid-1990s, the second-year-old dissolved in time, but there were no relapses.

I make mistakes so well that I only learn from them. Other mistakes are of very low quality.

“And I know what you’re looking for,” said the taxi driver on the way to Vnukovo. “I’ve been driving people to the airport for five years, I recognize that look right away. You are looking for a passport. Turn off the alarm and look into the front pocket.
Oh, here is he! But how do you know...
and five. The flight.

Pete, do you know what a prospect is?
Vasily Ivanovich is good. I have enough explanation for the nuance.

I had three aunts, two dads sisters and one mom. We didn’t love her very much – she was cold, ulcerative, often rude. The fathers were kind, constantly chatting with us, three nephews, constantly saying that they love. But one day, my dad died, and my mom went crazy of sorrow – for a few months she could not recover. Daddy's sisters were constantly coming, talking about something with her, grabbing us sympathetically on the head. My mom’s sister came less often, but she brought us food, cleaned the house, bathed my mom, scratched her.

One day good aunts came and locked up with their mother, as suddenly came a bad aunt, and almost kicked them out of the house. We wanted to rush to their defense, but suddenly our beloved aunts began to curse us, cry out and wish death to our mother. We hated my aunt, but she lived with us for a few months. She never gentled with us, but the house was always clean, there was a hot lunch, my mom took her medications on time. When there were problems in school, my aunt went and got it all right; when I broke my arm, my aunt on her arms ran with me to the injury point.

Later my mother recovered, life re-entered, and a long time later we learned that my sister’s daddy after his death tried to persuade my mother to sign papers to renounce all real estate and assets in their favor, thus leaving us poor without a roof over our heads. Aunt died at the age of 72, without changing her cold temper, but this did not prevent us from constantly saying that we love her and there is no person dearer to us.

Take my son to kindergarten. On the way I pick up a neighbor with a child （our children go to one group）, and another neighbor. Explanation: they are not husband and wife, just neighbors.

Let us communicate. She calls her neighbor “Uncle Cole” and “you” all the time, although they’ve known each other for more than a year. I asked her why she called him uncle.

－And how do I treat him？We have a big age difference. I am 28 years old, he is probably over forty. His daughter has almost finished school.

－43 －I will clarify.

－ Well you see, 15 years of difference.

－Why then don’t you call me “Uncle Vitya”？

－ Why Uncle Viti？

－Because I’m six months older than Uncle Cole.

did not believe. I had to show my passport.

Now I’m “Uncle Vichy,” really “you.”

A few years ago, in the kindergarten, where the son was going, decided to conduct the testing of children. I invited a psychologist, who decided that the drawing will tell everything.

In the evening, the wife calls, the voice shakes, says you need to talk seriously.

Karoche, his son, painted everyone, even the dog, with colored flommasters, and me, black, and also painted black.

Paper from a psychologist: I am a tyrant, my son is afraid of me, I keep in fear of everyone and everything.

I blame myself for my sins.

I sat in front of him and asked:

“Son, why did you paint all of them with colored flommasters and paint me black?”

The answer characterizes the work of fashion psychologists:

“Daddy, the color painting stopped, I said and they gave me black, I had to paint you black.



What is the point of history, you ask? The psychologist no longer works in the kindergarten, but has his practice, where parents take the children.

We sit in the universe in a pair. The teacher confusingly and incomprehensively explains the material, group

He is confused and does not understand.

Finally, the paddle is desperate and paints on the green board with a white mole (this is important!) The two targets.

Here is! He says. You will now understand the difference. Look at the right target. It is white on a green background. Now look to the left. It is black on a green background. Now you can see for yourself that they are completely different!

Everyone who has listened to the lesson so far has had a hanging of the brain’s operating system. There was a silence in the audience, in which, if you listen, you could distinguish how the hatchbacks whistle in our hemispheres.

Voice from the group:

How are they different if they are both white? ! to

And you imagine! It was his answer.

The rest of the couple went boring, and history would have been forgotten if the first-time student had not approached us at the end of the same day.

Was this your first couple with a name? He asks us.

Well yes, at us. What is it? I answer me.

What about triangles?

Which triangles? O. O

We just sat down on the sides, as he painted a triangle on the board and said it was black. We are like, “Well, black means black.” So he started screaming at us that we were stupid! And that the previous group was at least smarter: asked how this could be, if a white...

I have a acquaintance. He doesn’t drink and hates drunk driving. There have been several instances when he saw on the road "whipping" cars, dropped all his affairs, followed this driver (on the road reporting to the appropriate service), until he was caught.

I also told such a case. He came with his family to his brother. Brother gathered for something to the store in the middle of the night in the car (naturally, during the feast he drank). My friend insists, does not let his brother out of the apartment. My brother is on his own.

B: Well night in the courtyard, everything will be fine (bla-bla-bla).

When the excuses did not work, another conversation began:

B: And what will you do? Will you call the police?

Z is yes.

B: You won’t call me.

The acquaintance calls. His brother, still not believing what is happening, is listening to the conversation. The Deputy (D):

That is, I listen to it.

Q: I want to inform you that a drunk driver is going to leave from such an address right now.

D: How did you find out about it?

H: So I’m with him right now!

D: And what are you doing there?

Z: I am his brother, I came to visit him.

With a duty stomp. Within a few seconds, he reveals:

- And you called to report that your brother is going to drive drunk?

Z is yes. What is this? Will he strike on someone? I will not forgive myself for not stopping him.

D (after a few seconds of reflection): - And give your brother a phone.

After a few minutes of talking with the guard, the brother calmed down and did not go to the store.

After the story, I asked a friend:

What if my brother went?

Q: Well then, at least, let me prepare to scratch a penalty and soon walk.

Independence from public opinion is called peace of mind.

“Gop-stop, we came across the corner” (c)

Assistant President Andrei Belousov proposed to Vladimir Putin the idea of “removing” more than 0.5 trillion rubles from the profits of mining, metallurgy, chemical and petrochemical companies. It is advisable to instruct the government to submit proposals on such additional sources of income, wrote Mr. Belousov. On July 28, the President put on the letter of his assistant (published on the Internet) the resolution "I agree."

In translation from the bureaucratic-banditic, this means that a small six of the big pahan has come up with a place to find money for a fellow. I tolerated divorce on lava. Here as if everything is understandable, from the point of view of the thief world, and everything is logical: the wallet or life.

But if you still think about the fact that a very large official simply offers to take money from the business to replenish the empty treasury, then it will be a kitsch. If the business is against, then it is generally ruined or even jailed until it makes the right decision. The irony of the situation is that in it, the bandits are jailed for relatively honest people, and not the opposite. Officials think like small thieves: money can and should be taken directly from the fools (by the way, they are fools only because they cannot answer. And they cannot answer simply because to any serious response, the brothers of the officials, the blood-protectors, immediately rush and sew the matter with rotten white threads.)

Locals from Veliky Novgorod write on the internet that in the city it is not delicious and not very expensive to eat, for a very simple reason: as soon as a cafe or restaurant opened, it was immediately pushed off by officials or bandits (there is no difference, bandits are less honest and keep the word more often if they give it, because for the market you have to be held accountable). But to manage and think the peppers are not very able, and the matter collapses very quickly.

The typical behavior of the parasite: dry up the host's dry, let it breathe and switch to a new one. This is how the office car works from the top to the bottom. You constantly hear the question: when will they eat? The answer is never, because the parasite cannot stop on its own.

- Who does not claim the money of the Pension Fund... And the government, and VEB, and Chubai, and Vekselberg, and Greff...
Just like those... retirees.
What does this have to do with it at all?

Living the Commandments is not life, but preparation for a better life.

Yesterday, the man in the airplane stewardess was calmed for an hour. Such a classic type, everything with it - blush like in the seventh month, red rose, barcode head, sandals, T-shirt with a wolf. It is clear that his vacation started in the morning and he is already in the best world where you are beautiful and intelligent, where you get everything done and you sincerely do not understand why these boring people around you are angry instead of enjoying life together.
And then I thought that it often happens, you fly to yourself quietly in the plane and suddenly stewardess on the radio:
- Dear passengers, if there is a professional doctor or at least a healthcare worker among you, please contact the flight attendant, one of the passengers suddenly became ill.
And usually someone goes up, goes to this patient, gives him something from the urgently brought pharmacy bag, and makes him some sort of massage there. The man gradually goes away and the doctor is thanked, and even sometimes he is knocked.
But why shouldn’t they ever say this, for example:
“Dear passengers, maybe among you is an athlete or even a former, better a boxer or a handheld, please contact the boarding staff, one of the passengers suddenly got well.
And then everyone would start to look around each other, and you would slowly rise from your place. You get upset, of course, but you need to help a person.
The stewardess leads you to him, he stands, walks, pleases himself with something, and two of him are already holding his arms.
And you what, yet it is known - the weight on the right, the fingers raised, the left slightly marked and baum him with the right straight in the beard. He’s silent, and you get him a couple more to control – grandmothers like from a stand!
Well, it’s dull, it’s hearty, it’s seated, and you’re going back to your place. People from all sides look with respect, and the most beautiful stewardess approaches your chair and says:
“Thank you,” he says, “you, a huge man, were already afraid that you would have to go for this mess.
“Yes, nonsense,” you humbly answer, “react to me.
by robertyumen

If the divorce of Petrosyanov does not distract the people from thinking about retirement age, they will have to marry Alla Borisov again.