I thought it was hard to surprise me, but, as they say, don’t be surprised.

The place of action is our days (yesterday), Volokolamsk.

The director is informed that during the cleaning of the swamp in the territory of the mine was found. Which of the mines are launched...

Well, the director contacts the police, those with the Emergency Ministry come, a man in a armor approaches, inspects, says - call the sappers, the mine is rusting. The sappers will come only the next day (unclear, okay). The police leave the sergeant to guard the rugged mine. I call the director in the morning.)

- This is the case, the sergeant for the night mine... took home, so as not to wait all night, and brought back in the morning.)))

The morning. I took my grandson to the kindergarten and went to work. I approach the T-shaped intersection on a secondary road, stopped to miss those who are on the main road.

In the main rush, the haishnikov car is driving, the one in the passenger seat is looking at me.

Immediately behind the intersection, their car stops, the captain-in-chief jumping out of the car and stopping me.

The captain is like that, checking the documents, everything is okay, you can go. Then there was this conversation:

- Commander, tell me what was so suspicious in my car that you stopped for me?

and belt.

So I was attached.

That is suspicious.

It happened here, a day ago, to go in public transport. Heat below 30, hot, sweat. Oh, the grandmother in the wool cloth and in the pantyhose! Chinese, Chinese from the 90s. Money to the conductor gives and demands, does not ask, namely, requires that the locks of the bus (guard) and forks closed. that :

Not for money, grandmother. Order a taxi! Turn the oven on!

I found it, the stallion. The grandmother wept and went.

Going today to shave, talked to a girl hairdresser, she says - you have such good hair, you probably wore long hair during the Beatles? I only have 40. OOO

A friend works in the deck. Two days in 12 hours. They were asked to go out for an unscheduled night shift during their rest. for a walk. It was strictly requested. The men gathered and began to get angry. The type that for a vacation, there the same night must pay, and better generally for double payment. Do not go! So they broke the collective and went apart by the houses.

A friend told me this after a beer. And one whitened with grays camarded him and said:

There will still be a rat that will go out to work to lick the boss.

Yes, we have a collective! All men of the world! Heat with a friend.

A few days later he told me.

Everyone went to work except him.

I had three stories in my life, after which I stopped giving people money on the street.

1st The Favourite

We went with a friend to the KFC as schoolchildren, picked up food and already departed from the box office, as a bombardment came to us and asked for money for potatoes. The friend complained and gave, the boy recounted the little things and asked, "What, you don't give money for cheese? “” To what a friend quite reasonably said something like, “Are you not an officer? “”

Bohm turned in the direction of the exit with the words "I don't eat without cheese potatoes" and left. The whole line and the cashiers.

2nd Get a ticket home.

The classic now divorce with a suitcase, but then seemed to be a novelty, gave a guy 200p for food and offered to transfer to relatives or friends money on the card so that we could take them off at the ATM, which he replied: "No, I don't want to stress anyone, and so norm, they feed for free, the money is given, and friends will then have to give."

Three I want to eat that the tubes burn.

The bombardment came and begged tears to give money, because he died of hunger. I went to the nearest dining room with him, he was not allowed inside, said he would wait, in the end I bought soup, cabbage, something else. I go out and he is not. It became so rough that he threw food straight into the urn. He returned to the stop, and he is already dull.

One day, I remembered such a story:

I turned my foot on football and had to go to the clinic. I was very young and my mother led me (you know in Chelyab, Leninsky, where the trams will jump, the eighth child), here she rushed, and I crumbled small, she says harshly.

and faster,

I stopped her with the question:

“Mom, would you like to have a mom like me?“”

She shrugged. I thought. And he said “No.”

I’ve lost my whole family a long time ago, but because of this story I remember it.

Love your mother, she is alone.

People sitting at the budget feedbox do not need a food basket.

Have you ever lived near a mountain river?
In my youth I had to live a couple of months in the Caucasus at an altitude of 1500 m in the valley of the river Laba.
When we arrived there, the noise of the river overwhelmed all the other sounds in the valley. To say something, I had to scream in my throat. I thought that the cranes: either we will squeeze everything, or we will shake our throats, or both.
Two or three days passed. It turned out that birds are singing here, cycades are striking, there is no need to roar at all, and the noise of the river is heard only if you listen specifically.
More experienced comrades in mining explained that it is the brain itself, beyond our will, filters out the constant useless noise, not carrying information.
So, dear women, don’t be offended that your husband doesn’t hear your vocal flow.
Nothing personal, only physiology.

Can you talk about anything other than retirement?
and well.
Well, let’s talk about fishing.
“I also thought I’d retire, I’d go fishing, and now you’ll survive this fucking fishing.

He taught his future wife to swim. We went into the sea not very deep, approximately through the chest. He began to show how to breathe, grasp, and so on. He supported her from below when she lay on the water.

They sailed along the shore. But, apparently, the bottom was not very even, and, swimming a little aside and tired, she decided to stand on her feet. But the bottom was not underneath them, and she, in panic, grabbed me so that it was impossible to tear her off. I, in this state, naturally, too, could not swim and tried, resisting her pressure, to advance together towards the shore. But nothing came out of it, the grip was strong and pulling down.

I don’t know how, but in a state of shock, the brain thinks differently. He began to act intuitively, and then recalling this situation was shocked by the fact that if not this decision, they could drown together.

I shouted to her, “Exhale and hold on! "And he himself, having exhaled, went down with her to the bottom (it was very close, even less than a meter below us) and walked down the bottom to the side of the shore. It all happened in seconds.

Remembering is still scary.

I remember when you started walking at 11 months, like a cat whispered naked.

Uncle, who are you?

I’m signed to your mother on social networks.

The true sign of the banana republic is the expensive bananas.

The "Wild" Lieutenant: the chief idol of Fidel Castro and Che Guevara

In 1963, in Spanish-language newspapers was published an interview with the leader of the Cuban revolution, and for one of the most famous people of our time, Fidel Castro. Among the many rather traditional and familiar questions, one emerged: "Which of the heroes of the Second World War could you call your idol?" Apparently the journalists wanted to hear the name of someone famous, but the commander was not so simple.

Being an educated man, he, like legendary Che Guevara, had a huge passion for books. Once in his hands got the story of Alexander Beck "Volokolamskoye Highway" about the feat of the 8th Guard Panfilovskaya Division. One of the main characters of the book is now the little-known Soviet officer from Kazakhstan, Bauzhan Momish-ulla, he called his hero. But how did this hero of heroes become famous?

A noble and beautiful young officer went to serve in the RKKA a few years before the Great Patriotic. During this time he had time to learn to be an artillery officer, took part in battles in the Far East with the Japanese army, participated in the campaign to Bessarabia. Then he went to serve in Alma-Ata, where he was struck by the war.

In the autumn of 1941 he asked to the front as a volunteer, just at this time in the city was formed 316-shooter division. Already at the stage of creation, it was assumed that this unit would be one of the most combat capable - it was sent to adult men who had an idea of war, all of them were volunteers. In the part of Momoch-ul was appointed commander of the battalion.

The first appointment of the division threatened to be the last - the military part was sent to protect the approaches to Moscow. The command understood that the offensive units of the Wehrmacht would simply turn 316th, but it was necessary to hold the capital before the approach of the Far Eastern armies. The case was complicated by the fact that the Soviet command literally prohibited the study of defensive concepts in the army, it was assumed that the Red Army should be defeated by offensive operations on foreign land. You could have lost your position for a different point of view.

But Ivan Vasilyevich Panfilov, who had to command the 316th division, went to the trick. He developed a tactic of conducting spiral combat. In his opinion, under the condition of a numerically superior enemy, acting by the usual methods was suicide. Thus, his divisions had to keep a front length of more than 40 kilometers, although according to all norms of war time they could only defend 12 kilometers. In such a situation, any concentrated attack by the enemy would break through the defense. And then Panfilov suggested to act as follows.

The unit did not need to arrange an entire defensive front. Instead, it was necessary to strike a moving enemy column, and, after a short fight, move away from the attacking enemy. On the way behind the retreating division, small settlements and resistance foci were organized, which seduced the enemy to the side of the retreating, while delaying. After the enemy stretched out, the division sharply changed direction and returned again to strike the main forces. Such disturbing strikes greatly stretched the enemy's forces, which greatly slowed its advance. As a result, the division not only survived, contrary to all predictions, but also did this heroically, for which it was renamed the 8th Guard Panfilovskaya.

It is noteworthy that Panfilov developed only the theory, but the best to implement it was the Combat Momoch-Ula. Having entered the battle in mid-October 1941 as a commander of the battalion, in November he already headed the regiment, although he remained a "starley". The significance of his merits can be judged by the fact that Panfilov’s defensive theory was called the “spiral of the Momişula.”

Colonel-General Erich Goepner commanded the 4th tank group, and it was he who had to face the tactics of the young Kazakh. During the offensive, he would write in his reports to Hitler: "A wild division, fighting in violation of all statutes and rules of battle, whose soldiers do not surrender to captivity, are extremely fanatical and do not fear death."

The only wildness of the International Volunteer Division was that they were not familiar with the German plans. Instead of heroically dying under the hooks of German tank armies, the regiment of Momoch-Ula chose life and victory.

The tactics of the "wild" Kazakh can be judged by several episodes. On his first day on the front, the lieutenant proposed to the commander of the regiment to create a squadron of 100 volunteers and make a night trip with them. With him he took only the most experienced and at night went to one of the villages occupied by the enemy. In less than an hour, three hundred enemies were destroyed.

Under the Demian regiment, the senior lieutenant had to meet with the SS division "Dead Head". Here he had to fight again with a numerically superior enemy. He selected six settlements occupied by the enemy. Twenty units, into which the regiment was divided, under the cover of the night alternately attacked all targets at once. As soon as the enemy organized the defense, the squadron retreated, and a few minutes later another division attacked the village from the other side. And such a hell was created in all six directions for several hours. The renowned division with a loud name held as it could, but was confident that it would deter the main offensive of the Soviet army. They did not know that they were fighting with a troubled regiment. During the night, the losses of the fighters of Momoş-Ula amounted to 157 fighters, the SS division was underestimated 1200 soldiers.

As we can see, the starley adhered to the tactics of Alexander Suvorov – always hold the initiative in the offensive. However, modern realities have also been taken into account. The Panfilovs could not give one general battle. After they crushed one German part, several others fell on them. Momish-ul was repeatedly surrounded, but each time he broke, while keeping his battalion, regiment and division in full combat readiness.

The 30-year-old Lieutenant began his legendary journey in October 1941 with a combat, a month later he commanded the regiment, in February he headed his native division, while remaining a senior lieutenant. Only a few months later he was awarded one after another extraordinary titles up to Colonel. He was nominated for the title of Hero of the USSR, but was rejected.

The delays with the awards were influenced by his peculiar character. His colleagues described him as a cheerful, cheerful man who always told the truth. This has caused a lot of friction with the boss.

This is a rather comic situation in the future. According to the stories of Momish-Ula, her adoptive father rarely used his connections and influence, but he loved to read about himself in newspapers. He learned how highly his feats were appreciated by Fidel Castro and Che Guevara and immediately sent them an invitation to visit. Cuban guests, during a visit to the USSR immediately stated that they would like to meet with the legendary "wild" Kazakh.

The authorities began to organize the meeting. But there was one problem - the apartment house, where the legendary panfilovec lived, was in a terrible condition. The local authorities immediately offered the family to move to a new apartment, but Momish-ul rejected. He stated that he is not ashamed to receive guests in such a house, and if anyone is ashamed of his housing, let him live with it.

After long negotiations, all sides came to a compromise - the hero's house was repaired, and he settled with his family at the hotel during the repair. A whole delegation came to visit the commander, it turned out that Castro virtually did not break up with the books of Momish-ulla, but it was impossible to discuss all the topics in one short visit, so the hero of the war was invited with a return visit to Cuba. In 1963, this invitation was fulfilled.

The meeting of the Kazakh legend could only be compared to celebrations in honor of Yuri Gagarin. The Cubans expected that their idol would hold lectures on warfare over the course of a month, but Momish-ul refused, saying that he would do it in 10 days, but he could not be delayed – he was awaited by students. He taught courses in the military school "exit from the surrounding without losses" and "guiding night battles in the offensive".

Baburzhan Momish-ulla died in 1982 at the age of 71. He was awarded the title of Hero only in 1990.

Putin doesn’t like raising the retirement age.
Putin with the people. It’s a pity that he doesn’t decide anything in the Kremlin.

I lived with a girl, I am 21, she is 22. I watched football and she was there. And then something knocked on me, I said, "And you know that players first play a match without a stand, look at the bill, and then repeat it in front of the spectators?" I said and forgot. A couple of months later, she goes to her parents in another city, and there is a call: "Taran44ik you are a fool!" And everything in this way. God sees, I’ve put in my head everything I could do, but it turned out to be a little easier. Sitting her dad is watching football, and then my favorite decided to shine with knowledge in football and said that in general she knows about the scheme with two matches.

The retirement age should be raised, but on a voluntary basis, but for those who initiated and supported it, forced.

The bullet hit him in the cheek and flew into his neck.
“Yesterday, the head of Kutuzov was shot again. I think he will die today or tomorrow.”

In 1774 in the battle near the village of Shuma near Alushta, 300 people were killed by the Turks, the Russians lost 32 people. Among the wounded was Lieutenant Colonel Kutuzov.
“This chief officer was wounded by a bullet that, hitting him between the eye and the whisker, flew out in the same place on the other side of his face.”
The bullet hit the commander in his left eyelid, came out of his right eye, but did not hit him.
He was operated. Doctors considered the wound deadly.
However, Mikhail Illarionovich recovered, although the recovery process was long.

On August 18, 1788, during the siege of the fortress, Očakov Kutuzov was again seriously wounded in the head. The bullet hit Mikhail Illarionovich in the cheek approximately in the same place where he was wounded in 1774. From a great loss of blood he felt weakness and was taken out of the battlefield. In a letter to the Austrian Emperor Joseph, Prince de Lin wrote: “Yesterday they shot Kutuzov’s head again. I think he will die today or tomorrow.”

“They shot the head again,” it sounds great.
Catherine the Great was able to pick people.

The trade union of prostitutes of Russia said that the most experienced and well-deserved people who have reached the pre-retirement age of 63 years will go to the deputies and officials.

The fools in their mania of the Vedic always consider their personal interests and the interests of their hosts to the interests of the whole country. And when someone presses their tail, they whisper about betrayal and betrayal.