bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №49332
 24.06.2011
I haven’t shaved for a long time. Finally forced. and shaved. The next long awaited in the reflection of the drawing of all the texts.

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №49331
 24.06.2011
X: Let’s sleep a little later.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
XXX Yes Yes Yes!I will be!! to

[ + 67 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №49330
 24.06.2011
The body of an unknown animal weighing 4.5 tons and lengthing 16.5 meters was found by Chinese fishermen on one of the beaches of Guangdong Province.

Fuck you, your shit is dead! The Japanese played.


[ + 110 - ] Comment quote №49329
 24.06.2011
You said "I didn’t like the book". Why did you read it at all? And the films. and sex. If you don’t like it, why end it?
- she lively imagined how two are having sex, and suddenly someone suddenly stops, says: "Yes, fuck something" and begins to dress.

[ + 61 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №49328
 24.06.2011
I don’t understand why, if someone is dissatisfied with something, he puts it on the BOR?(Sorry for the disappointment, I am just here)
At the top of the page, there is a link to the site "forbidden"!Post your thoughts on the topic:How about all the h*yevo, all on h*y and so on!do not like - do not comment! They fooled the BOR in seven years so that neither in a fairy tale nor in a pen can be described.
Whoever agrees, add a...

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №49327
 24.06.2011
The recent hurricane in Moscow.
Now I saw a vortex flying my ass forward!!))

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №49326
 24.06.2011
Teisha is the mother of an ideal woman who was not lucky with her husband.

[ + 70 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №49325
 24.06.2011
1942 in Stalingrad. The Germans are preparing a tank strike, seeking to cut off those defending from the Volga. The only chance to stop them is to bomb tank fuel warehouses found by the intelligence. They should be ordered to be destroyed immediately.
The Colonel, commander of the Pe-2 Regiment, understands perfectly why this order was given to him. He was the only one who had three more pickers in the morning.
The pedestrians did not return from their assignment. Orders must be executed.
Of the aircraft capable of flying, there was only a connected Po-2 - a flooring floor covered with pearl, with a load capacity of two hundred kilograms. But to break through a seriously fortified roof of the warehouse, a more solid bomb is needed.
- Hang the fifty, - commands the Colonel, - on the fuel locks
by Baka.
- It won't take off... The castles won't hold up... - the voices are heard.
This is an order, the Colonel struggles.
- And who will fly, - the chief of staff is curiously interested, realizing that
The pilot is unlikely to return.
- The helmet is for me and the parachute, - addressing the adjunct, says the Colonel.
– You can’t – the assistant tries to stop him.
- No, on the 10th parachute - excess weight, carry 200 grams of vodka.

The aircraft, driven by the last force of the engine, somewhat miraculously takes off and, without even trying to gain height, takes the course to the southern part of Stalingrad.
Po-2 due to overload and altered weighing is almost uncontrollable, it is wrapped on the tangage and crane, and due to a lack of speed constantly pulls to fall into the roof. But the Colonel is a real ass, and he manages to hold the car.
A minute after forty, he was almost at the goal, the Messers were hit twice in the way, but they were higher and did not notice him, or took for a chariot slipping on the ground. The engine, working at the limit, begins to smoke, the plane begins to whisper even louder. Below the anti-aircraft, they are standing at the guns, but for some reason they do not shoot, but the Colonel is not before them, here is the wreck, but here are the warehouses, a little more, he pulls the throwing pen, the plane throws up, the bomb is gone.
The rocket immediately began to gain speed, the talk disappeared, the anti-aircraft opened fire, but it was too late. The warehouses are burning.

The chief of staff Paulus personally came to find out why the anti-aircraft officers did not open fire on time. But the same thing was from all the batteries: "We thought he was already shot down, he smoked and literally crawled in the air, decided he was falling... planes don't fly that way."

And our colonel, returning, got an excuse, because there was a strict order of the Stack, prohibiting commander of regiments to participate in combat flights.
The excuse, before all the building, the Colonel was made by the commander himself.
The Stalingrad Front Marshal Tymoshenko. He hugged her hand and kissed her three times.

[ + 85 - ] Comment quote №49324
 24.06.2011
I think I would take it to the sea so that I could go out.
On the beach and all around?! to
Take the ski.

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №49323
 24.06.2011
Did you know that the eight-legged seed is his sexual organ? Which he often leaves in the body of a female, and then he grows a new one... I now fear the ocean... the eight-legged have nothing to lose.

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №49322
 24.06.2011
Conversation of two friends:
I love my dog as much as you love my boyfriend.
and yes? I don’t know, I’m not ready to clean up his shit all my life.
I love the dog even more!

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №49321
 24.06.2011
XXX: The question as to a lawyer - how long can we have sex with women?
YYY: I’m glad you appreciate my skills as a lawyer, but you know...
In principle, you can fuck around the clock.

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №49320
 24.06.2011

Lana
and Sassy

Andrey
Wow, what an erotic thank you :)

[ + 82 - ] Comment quote №49319
 24.06.2011
I looked at the toys. I tried to understand how, playing in all this, children grow up in a state of mental health. I walked past the stand with friends of Luntik. It looks like I am in the morning. But I am treating, and Luntik is selling.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №49318
 24.06.2011
A month ago he broke his leg. He writes:

Life is slowly trying to get into a normal course, I try to break my leg, despite severe pain, I try to get out of the house, walk around...
Yesterday went with a sweet to the movie)) And I am now for confidence and support I go with a trunk... Here... Well, we came to the cinema, pop-corn, all that, we entered the hall, sat down, we sit, we watch the movie... A terrible horror)))
When I sat down, I put the trunk in front of me, leaning to the back of the chair in front of me... It was empty, and the girl sitting next to that chair, my trunk couldn’t hinder...
In general, there is a terrible horror, I accidentally hit the trunk and she quietly so sliding on the back of the chair falls on the shoulder of the girl sitting in front)) Lightly so, tick))) But this was enough for the girl to whisper up))))
The movie for us with sweet turned further into a comedy, barely humbled to rub))

[ + 114 - ] Comment quote №49317
 24.06.2011
Do you have any shortcomings?
Excessive directness.
I think it is the opposite of dignity.
I don’t care what you think.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №49316
 24.06.2011
A bad dancer is disturbed by eggs, and a bad admin is always disturbed by winds.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №49315
 24.06.2011
from ZH

Lena: Well, suddenly she will kill herself... My conscience will be tormented.
Rouge_glace: Don’t worry, Lena, the more suicides, the fewer.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №49314
 24.06.2011
I went to the gynecologist. He asks:
Do you have sexual life?
No is
for a long time?

[ + 65 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №49313
 24.06.2011
I am in shock with Vadim.
WOW: What is it? He is silent, right?
Q: Remember he wondered what Vic was flying from him? The guy said he was with Gondon and all that)))))
The devil ended up in the gondon, then thought that all the sperm there, removed it, and again began to beat the whistle.
Q. Can I tell him what he did wrong?
I have a girl who wants to know me, a girl who wants to know me ?

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna