bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №138191
 25.01.2017
I always say that there is no point in waiting for a celebration if you can make it so that the celebration is every day.

YYY: I almost slept.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №138190
 25.01.2017
xxx: It's nice to work in a cute women's team - "It's hot in the office, because the sun is burning in our back, so we decided to open the window on your side". On the street 10.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №138189
 25.01.2017
From the situation: he has an apartment, and she has nowhere to go, there is one interesting way out. Here a man thought with his head, earned money for an apartment, found a young girl to give birth to healthy children (very smart counselors, calculate how much you need to work for the average person (genius do not take into account, they and giving birth to the 6th child, can create and develop a business) to earn for an apartment + to save for 3 years of a minimum sitting at home and find the difference in the odds of easily carrying out pregnancy and giving birth to a healthy child at 18+ and at 35+). So, he has an apartment, his children and he too (thus, the apartment is written and they have the right to live in it), there is a stable family, so let us in court in the case of a divorce, the woman will say: I do not have the opportunity to provide appropriate conditions for the children, let them live with their dad, and for themselves - the right to see. After that, go to any job (for example, a seller 20-40k+), pay 25-50% of alimony (5-20k) and see the children a couple of times a week. And let these super-smart husbands come up with how to take children out of the garden, look for who will sit with them at the hospital and so on. Yes, and for children, the outgoing mother, cheerful and happy several times a week, is much more pleasant than the nervous woman, always looking for money.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №138188
 25.01.2017
The child wrote: Dad loves Mom. No one described our relationship.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №138187
 25.01.2017
The smokers! And hardly to say what the ugliness was painted on the last package? Fuck not to look.

No one looks at the warnings. All to start.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №138186
 25.01.2017
Can you tell me where the synagogue is?
Do I look like someone who knows this?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №138185
 25.01.2017
Bagira, Ladomir and Dobryny: the Urals organized a competition of unusual names of newborns.
And in Kazakhstan – Aibiliv Aikenflaev.

[ + 23 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138184
 25.01.2017
#to_this

here here :

And I’m gay, and I’m upset that gay and members consider something bad and put it in line with shit.

My sweet, I don't like - cheese to Europe. Together with my member.

...

I am not gay and the quote is not mine, I just enter.

You have learned to write, you would still think to learn yourself, and not by the patterns of milonovevizulines.

Aside from the rights of homosexuals in Europe, have you ever heard of any rights? Or have you in "Europe with gays" the light of the clone?
The main achievement of Europeans, like most secular Western countries, is freedom of expression and freedom of choice. Freedom of thought and creativity. And the freedom to choose sexual preferences is just a little bonus to all freedoms. Moreover, no one is stressed by such a bonus, and no one is absolutely struggling, no one but the guys in the slopes and campgrounds from the depths of the CIS, who are struggling on this matter more than the Europeans.
Yes, it is equally equal for everyone to mock gays as we do for naturals, the value is not in gays, but in the fact that no one there wakes anyone up to beat, hang or drive into the gas chambers of those who are not like everyone else.
It would be better for you to be more interested in the scientific achievements of Europeans, which are unrealisable for us, because we have more homosexuals than we have in Europe.

[ + 43 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138183
 25.01.2017
Tobacco smoke is no more harmful than any other smoke, but never in his life he has encountered fighters.

WOW: I’ve never met a person chewing a straw in the elevator, on the entrance, or under the straw at a bus stop during the rain.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №138182
 25.01.2017
Thank God we are not Arabs.
Thank God I am an atheist.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №138181
 25.01.2017
and embarrassed.
Qqq: I have never seen a line of priests wanting to dive into the ice...
Where did you see the shepherd eating grass?

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №138180
 25.01.2017
Which product, such is the buyer.

No, I have not heard. All the girls who wanted to get married to me were lazy, unworking hookers. Although it was not immediately seen - silent, modest such...

Dogs, in secret, I will say to your ear: active working people and ambitious people never want to get married, they have problems with their throat, and they don’t have time. Usually they get married, because it is not time to get married, they want to, but because they want to spend the rest of their lives with a particular man and share life with him.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №138179
 25.01.2017
There is a small nuance

And yes, it would be stressful for me if I had a bowl of salad for dinner instead of a steak. The wife will go for a steak with this pelvis on her head.

You can no longer see a wife, a basin, or a steak. He will go for a steak and go to a normal man.
My husband prefers salad, just find a wife who prefers steak and you will be happy.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №138178
 25.01.2017
#Nudged

>>> And then was my wife fed?
Cleaning has been almost automated, washing has been automated for a long time. What will a woman do at home? Staying in bed and keeping in touch? Then she fed me at home when it was cheaper to have a mops.

Well, if you consider the presence of a wife exclusively from utilitarian positions, it is really easier to get a mops. The cook will do well with cooking, and with the quenching of intimate hunger - a prostitute. In many cases, this combination will be cheaper. And - a pleasant bonus - no one can withstand the brain and create no additional problems.
Wife as an equal partner (both work, life plus-minus half, joy-grief-other also half) and just as a person who is good together? No, I have not heard.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №138177
 25.01.2017
The Law of Yarrow:
- bla bla bla... "this can be seen by children!"
Children can see a lot of things, such as writing in a mirror. Immediately ban the mirrors!

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138176
 25.01.2017
In the house of the former Deputy Prosecutor General of Ukraine found a gold spade. The product is made in sizes similar to those in which conventional garden blades are produced.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №138175
 25.01.2017
The miracle:

It has already been advised to silence with their problems to those who are bad for greetings (hearts, children, animal owners); those who are bad for bright blinking advertising (epileptics). You will be advised now.
This is what I say to you as a person with a low speed movement.
No, I am not a disabled. I only drive a wheelchair with one hand, and the other car drives a three-year wheelchair. We do not have the right to live at the speed that is convenient to us. And those who have a higher speed have a reason.

There are such people who perceive the surrounding world exclusively from their point of view. For example, every day I see in the crowded by people narrow underground passage of our transportation hub (this is narrow because it has long been built and with its current load especially in the morning it barely copes with) mothers with children who play fun games on the stairs, very hindering others to normally climb or descend, or their own, reluctantly wandering with stretched connected hands in the middle of the transition, and rushing to work or transplant people have to slip side by side. I will not be surprised if in 5 years this family will gladly launch salutes - the children will grow up, they will also want to.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №138174
 25.01.2017
Alez> I am 20))
IGS> to you 32
Alez> Yes, but in a 16-inch system 32 is 20!
IGS> Give you 10 trips.
Alez> In the 32nd system yes!))

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №138173
 25.01.2017
We went up to the minaret. There are a hundred and forty steps, but every one is half a meter. And then N. says to me, and you know that for the fact that you rose up, you are forgiven one sin? I said, fucking, I’m going to run like that!
He has committed two more sins.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №138172
 25.01.2017
My first game on my first PC was Max Payne, I passed it in three days I barely slept, liked it, gave the second part. A friend, already an experienced gamer, comes in to watch me play and wonder why I don’t use the slowdown, and is even more surprised when he learns that I’ve gone through the first part without any slowdown. The phones at the time were far from everybody, like computers and the Internet, and ask that no one had. So, the desire to play despite the lack of gaming experience, made me learn in each location the location of all enemies.

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