bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №48392
 03.06.2011
He is as stupid as three enots.
Why three units?
XXX: Four in the sum is smarter than him.

[ + 62 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №48391
 03.06.2011
Another interesting news: scientists report a worm that lives 1.3 km from the surface of the earth
Previous Post:There could not be life at all
YYY: How did the scientists get there?
Not the scientists, the robots watched =)
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[ + 102 - ] Comment quote №48390
 03.06.2011
I go to the toilet today for "important" affairs and immediately noticed that instead of a roll of paper lies a piece of rubbed. Well, all I did start means to use that precious piece, I still thought that the people were nice, left. And here at the end of the paper I see the inscription: "Distributed? Go and look. Help the next shit!" Well not long thinking went to the woman slowly, maybe there stayed. There is a miracle! I start to break and see the inscription" "Thank you! The quarter is over!"

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №48389
 03.06.2011
I remember working in a small office as a system administrator. Here is my day. The carpenter arranged. So, the director congratulates: Dear Birthday, Bespiri-Tyripiri.Let you always burn the blue screen...With the telecom computer confused a little(

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №48388
 03.06.2011
I: And who are you studying for? For a programmer?
No, it’s on the multimediator!
I am 0_o
Lenna: no computer and computer technology multimedia what is there...
I: You’re going to be in charge tomorrow with a cut more clothes...
Lena : Why?? to
I: It is a pity, even if something is pleasant...

[ + 89 - ] Comment quote №48387
 03.06.2011
Dialogue with my 3 year old son:
My Princess!
Yes to Misha?
You answer wrongly, you have to say: Yes, my knight!
Oh my knight!
The Princess! Take a pot, I’ll write!

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №48386
 03.06.2011
The girl at work closer to the evening:
"I just did something... I don’t know what, but I think it’s in vain"

[ + 58 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №48385
 03.06.2011
XXX: I have an aquarium dog. I sat in a fence with a high fence without a necklace, but managed to jump over with the help of my own bunch of fucking (I noticed that there was such a large bunch behind the booth!
Andy Dufrain’s escape from the show is resting.

[ + 90 - ] Comment quote №48384
 03.06.2011
I just read this:
"from contact: Diet: morning - tea/coffee, day - apple/orange/tea, 23:00 - BULOČKIPELMENIKOLBASAMASORYBAPECČENKISUKARATJATJATJATJATJAT!!and "

Hichikawa (it happens to people!)
I remember what I ate all day (coffee, cigarette, coffee... ice cream).
I turn my eyes to the table (a plate of potatoes and a pancakes).
I look at the clock at 23:02.
Tagged with ><


[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №48383
 03.06.2011
I see my mom has a bad mood.
I started cutting the chicken. I think, and what the hell doesn't joke, she dressed the chicken on her hand and began to run with wild cries in front of her mother. Most importantly, it worked...and I’m an educated adult.

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №48382
 03.06.2011
The disease covers Europe. WHO has partially solved the mystery: it is an unprecedented mutant bacterium.
Thank you, fucking, I guessed: this is an unknown fucking shit. And we doubted.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №48381
 03.06.2011
Today, Prep wrote a review about me before defending my diploma:

After consultation with the head of the graduate project student Drugal I.N. He appealed twice.
On the technological part of the project, I made a number of remarks, but most of the remarks of the diploma were challenged, and the impression was created that they were not interested in him.
At the second consultation held on 26 May, Drugal I.N. He brought a title sheet, a technological part and a special head with a request to put a signature on the title sheet and urgently give him the name of a specialist who will give a feedback on the diploma project, because he has little time to defend.
I had nothing left but to agree with the diplomat – suddenly in front of me a young follower of the brilliant Perelman, and the head of the diploma project is the first to underestimate him.
In the current situation to give an objective assessment of the quality of the Diploma Project Drugal I.N. It is not possible, however, to deprive a diplomat of the right to defend his work at the GAC meeting I consider it inappropriate.

It was "Good"!

[ + 62 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №48380
 03.06.2011
From the morning Sisadmin cried, asked which dog the router attracted to work and wi-fi set up. Grit can go to the grid to break it, and where physically it lies - hz.
Half an hour ago, he announced that he had found the router. under the table.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №48379
 03.06.2011
I can’t take him seriously.)
Lee : Why?
E: Yes, it is simply impossible. It is impossible to take a man seriously who commented on his photo: “Yes, you are harsh!” and replied: “And I will rape the bobs!”

[ + 76 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №48378
 03.06.2011
I can’t imagine being gay in a world where there are breasts 😉

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №48377
 03.06.2011
On the website I found:
"Have you ever seen a moving sort? No, this is not about VAZ products "

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №48376
 03.06.2011
Always tell people what you think of them. Truth is a sacred thing, and the bleaches go away in a week.
by Yuri Tatarkin

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №48375
 03.06.2011
It was celebrated in the anniversary department of Viktor Petrovich, a modest worker on the remaining boxes of Russian electronics. When the warmth of wishes and toasts had already filled those who had gathered and their eyes shone, it was time for fairy tales and tricks from the fleeting life. It was also from Viktor Petrovich, or simply Viti, if you compare it with the time of the bicycle.
In his youth, thirty years ago, full of excitement and interest in his business, he successfully studied in postgraduate studies, but already had a family. And in the brigade of the same postgraduates and candidates of sciences in the summer he travelled north, building and earning to live and create in the winter. It was called
“Riding on a shuffle,” if anyone does not know. They wandered on these shabashka all the light summer north day, like the peasants in distress, when “day year feeds.”
They built a road. She was carried out from a huge pile of bullshit at the nearest station. With the shoulder, he and his partner loaded a slice into the incoming cars at the pace of “take more, throw on, while flying – rest.” Nearby there were Koreans in the same bunch.
Most of them did not know the Russian language, but the interpreter (a Korean who spoke somewhat Russian) explained that they were from the DPRK (North Korea). Why or under what economic-military agreement-exchange they obtained from us, Vitya did not understand, and it does not matter.
The Koreans worked like the Koreans, that is, the spin did not spread, but we did not give in to them. Or even the opposite. Somehow, while there were no cars, he went down to the water supply column to rinse his face. The Tolmacher filled the boiler with water. He, looking at Vitya, giving up his seat at the water singer, nodded his head and said sympathetically, like a wise brother to the younger disobedient:
“What is Tyler? by Tiago! He was a witch, he had to learn!”

Viktor Petrovich told this fairy tale the last time fifteen years ago, because now laughed only those who, say so, remembered the song of Pakhmutova “Furious Structure.” Young Nina, a new designer, asked if she understood correctly that they worked in the summer “like,..., well, like the Tajiks now”, and that summer earnings could then be the whole year, well, just do nothing?
Victor Petrovich breathed, sneered and said nothing more.
He recalled this morning, a gray Tajik in a brigade of gastarbayters, the broken wheeled blocks of the rebrick in front of the passageway of the institute. He accidentally met him with a glance, and they for some reason struck each other. Victor
Petrovich now knew why: They were from one lost country, from one common youth, and both knew one thing, and also their common:
We change the rivers, the countries, the cities.
Other doors, new years
And we have nothing to do with ourselves,
And if you go, just nowhere.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №48374
 03.06.2011
Buy the batteries! The batteries will never sit down!

[ + 55 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №48373
 03.06.2011
How to fuck these fucking films on the iPhone 4 can cost 30 backs? Are they from the shit??? to

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna