An ambulance officer told me.
A 10-year-old boy was bitten by a donkey. The boy was with his dad on the street. So, when we arrived, we saw on the neck of the boy at the place of the bite hematoma about with the fist! I and the doctor in a stupor: what has bitten him?
and Dad:
I immediately started taking poison.

Yesterday I watched the 7th series "The Walking Dead". It seems that the writers decided to kill Karl. Do you imagine? Carla is Carl!

ra_85123: I sit at work, drink tea, read news
ra_85123: on one of the tabs of the eye stuck for the impeccable phrase "As Black and Mittal explain..."
ra_85123: read it again It was about the joint work of Benjamin Black and Tuschar Mittal.

A programmer is when working on a comp is more interesting than being a fan :)

The human ego, sir. They think they owe them everything, but they forget that I took nothing from them.

And again "mice ate cactus..."

The more I watch our television, the more I get strengthened in the thought that the most pleasant and least harmful for the psyche is advertising.

Do not look.

Such generous proposals.

Pepsi will soon release its smartphone.
I’m thinking who’s next, Zinger or Husqvarna?

I would take it from the shrimp. A smartphone with a two-stroke generator is much cooler than with a pedal drive. So what did Pepsi do? Fuel cell on sugar.

X: Ku ku) Normal, like yours?
Y: It is normal too. I was attacked by chicken chest today.)
X: How is it?? to
Y: I took half a chicken breast out of the refrigerator and started heating it in the microwave. Gray, I listen to it when it starts to whisper or explode a little. But nothing like that happened to my surprise. Waiting for a moment, I pulled her out, looked at her again, listened. She looked quite normal. I sat down at the table, moved a dish with the chicken closer, took the fork and knocked in the chicken...BABAKH! The chicken scattered throughout the kitchen. I am in the chicken, the table in the chicken, the beast in the chicken. She was everywhere: on the table, on the floor, even managed to fly back into the unclosed microwave. So I ate lunch.
X: I Cry by ROFL
Y: You know how scared I was.
x: Aaaaaah, thirsting )))
X: Explode, fucking the chicken!! to

Dear grandfather Kap, please explain, what exactly is the humor of combining the snowmen Olive and the cup of yogurt? We can’t get in (

[17:36:32] BigBoss: My accountant's campaign was also under pressure... for a week as
[17:37:05] BigBoss: all the work is over
BigBoss: I’m already striking it today... it doesn’t help.
[17:37:52] BigBoss: sitting dumb looking at the monitor, clicking from one letter to another and not doing it
BigBoss: What to do with her? to shoot?
My wife: Have sex with her.
[17:46:03] Wife: Many bugs are stubborn and boring precisely because of lack of courage
My wife: I have gone crazy! Go back!
BigBoss: Too Late

XXX: I am today
XXX: Walking in the Street
I learned so much about the norms of Russian language.
xxx and ice
YYY: AAA, I too
YYY: Even a lot has contributed

Will you come to the wedding?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY)
xxx: so is it
The only time I was there, I still remember with shame. A couple of friends get married, all grown up, such a solemn situation in the church. Everyone is listening, the music is harsh, the priest bats. and we here and Sania stand in such a red-mooded mood, have already submitted to the norms, and even an anticipation of the ongoing cheerful drinking))
yyy: here Sanya take and lick me - "Look, pop on a diving like", I whispered on the whole temple, stumbled on Sanya's chest, trying to hold the whistle, and scratched him in the swimsuit, so that it wasn't heard. And he knows, show the finger of the electricity, well he wrapped in my shirt with a moustache and also presses stands))))))
yyy: so and stood the whole event in an embrace with eggs, glimpsing at each other)))) other guests, looking at us, also smiled, the bridegroom looked and almost stopped in the voice, but in time got the elbow to the side of the bride
Yyyy: We didn’t want to drink any more after that (((
Yyy: The bride said we are two fools (
We go to church without you :)
Sanna also passed.

There was a pressurization team championship in our office. The winner with the highest pressure was awarded a prize - a new Japanese tonometer

Pepsi will soon release its smartphone.
I wonder who is next, Zinger or Husqvarna?

XHH: There was fun at all, we dropped them because of the employer’s wife.
She was gently speaking fucking, and he himself was the norm.
But since he was not going to change his wife, he had to say goodbye to him.

About the women’s statements: “Get married, and then you will pass by at least every day!”

My first task at work was to develop a module for communication with the digital board (well, such as in public transport hanging). I was a fourth grade student and worked mostly in the evening. Since the task was the first, and I was a programmer-unstudy time went decent. Especially many problems were with the withdrawal of the Cyrillic (many will understand). So at 23:30 I finally finish the module. I check two alphabets - Latin and Cyrillic. And in joy, I put the phrase in the board, which my unfortunate brain tells me: “Happiness! Fuck my ass!!



I went home satisfied and went to sleep. I didn’t know that in the morning the board would show the employer.

The child grows up, there are children’s things left. I wanted to help a poor family. Look at the website what they want. We are a poor family.

Just happened. Place of action is Moscow. The words of a friend. I found the phone under the bench in the lounge (shook my leg when I stood up). The Samsung Galaxy S5. Pressed on the turn-off button - it was working, 29 missed calls, stands on silent. All the calls were from the "Mommy" contact. My friend was waiting for a spouse, so he decided to call this contact to tell me where and when I could pick up the phone (I wanted to tell my home address). The dialogue:

“Hi, I found your phone, you can pick it up tonight, I can’t be there now.

Who are you lying to! My daughter just said the phone was stolen! We have already called the police. Now bring the phone to the Kotelniki (metro station)!

I am busy and will be home tonight. Let someone come and pick up the phone. I need nothing from you. I found him under the bench.

Oh you hate! The thief! P is Dars! The Lord Ndon! Students steal their phones and think everything will go out of hand? They will be buried in Mentoring.

I’ve changed my mind, I’ll sell your phone.



A friend throws the phone. Shut off the phone. He pulls out the symmetry. I paid a symbolic sum at the nearest subway.

[guess-crossword with 8 cells and a melody in the mid format]

Evgeny: Need to guess the performer
The name ends in w.
What options do you think?
Not scary and not scary.

by Oleg: Hz
The queen some
Bulanova, Lazareva and Началова

(After 2 hours)
by Eugene :
It turned out