Married to a nurse, at least one role-playing game in life less.

A couple of days ago, the store on the gasoline... I buy cigarettes and not to explain what exactly, silently get a package and say, - this is the same. The seller went to where they hid their cigarettes (you can’t see them now). After a short shower loudly like this: - and you are "suffering" or "impotence" is also suitable?
Rejoiced again.

When my wife suddenly approaches me, hugs, kisses and says, “You know how much I love you?“I’m getting scared. The car? The betrayal? The credit? Called to live?

In general, when I was whipped a week ago, the guy left alone in my shoes. And, I have to say, this was the only working pair of strict shoes in the winter, because in the second the cat snorted two months ago and I put it on the balcony and forgot it safely. And here comes today. I have a meeting, i.e. in the boots and other shoes the option is not to go.In the shoes the shit is hot,because +15 today was. There is one option - to wash the cacao from the second pair of shoes.... use to wash, it does not work.It is necessary to tear off the mattress.It was ripped, glued, with meat. I washed for half an hour, the cat was swallowed out of all his soul... with a housey soap and business soap, the hard side of the sponge. Clothed recently "Moment", there was no time to dry up and ran to do things. Rounded all day.
And here comes the time when the puppy, with whom we have seen several times and like each other, asks to meet her at the airport.I meet, we go back...it will go to me?",and I have a thought in my head: my socks smelled like a cat's shirt or a domostos, or even attached to the mattress...In short, I went home. Not a pedestrian?

Well, to the word, that didn’t go... because all three misfortunes happened.

I was once a young Marxist, only after universe. I decided to work on one building. And it must be said that the workers there were some former Zeka, and local calliers. Well, they poured the foundation out of concrete, but here is the trouble - too much was enough, higher than needed. Well, and I have the first task from the boss - measure everything and measure, how much extra stuff is poured and placed on them, how much to borrow, they will make breaks for the night. Well, I measured everything and placed on the area of the tablets - there 200, there 100 to remove. Well, as they taught, everything is certain - in millimeters.
I come in the morning - the men are all barely alive, in the head in the concrete places. It turns out that they were used to measuring in centimeters... You would see their faces when I told them to roll back O_o.

This virus is spreading so fast. My panacea is just beginning! (A 25-year-old girl who used the word "panacea" twice before, instead of "epidemic").
__________
Not an epidemic, but a paranoia.

X: I was fat and acne before, but now I am not. At the same time, the problem of addiction to harmful jerk solved itself and very unexpectedly. I came somehow to the supermarket, and there on the shelf are columns with inscriptions "for optimists", "for fantasists" and so on. I stand and think "I wonder, am I an optimist or a fantasist?". And then there is a thunderstorm in me "You are a gyrobas!". The desire disappeared and did not return.

Ishkan: Worried about looking for a new housewife. I eventually found it at the recommendation of a friend. Aunt made an indelible impression on him when during the first cleaning, she moved the winter rubber from the corridor, which stood there for the second month, to the balcony.

and AAA:
Yesterday only the child bought a book-colour with a fairy tale "Young"
Listen to it :)
The young chicken is lying all day in the sun, the shark scratches, it irritates the cockroaches and says:"Cockroach, cockroach, turn your eye on me, see what kind of shark I have".
And the cockroaches take their eyes away from her, they spit on themselves, her mother is flattered: she said, it is bad for her, such a gentle woman, to get under her gun and under her tails to look at cockroaches.
And the mother also in front of the cockroaches and shouts:"Do not touch her, she is small yet, and I am fit!"
This is such a bookshelf.

In the industrial zone of the city, on the fence of one base, advertising in large letters with paint:

Quick and high-quality repair of heavy machinery and trucks.

Before the beginning, someone added two words - "Not Entirely".
Probably used...

How do you get used to a girl?? to
Yy: Invite her to learn Russian together.

The husband must be fat and beautiful!
ZZ: I disagree with you!
zz: The husband must be C thick and beautiful!
ZZ : )

Now on the telecast I heard: "If a man was not married before thirty years, then something is wrong with this man."

Heh, the traveling frog... by the road.
The tourist agency of Moses!! to

to the names:
We have a real estate agency in the city "4 rooms".

The woman used the iron argument in the dispute:
Do you know how many years I lived with your beloved aunt? Yes, I have the full right to cockroaches in my head with a three-storey house growing!
I won, ch...

xxx:...in the dream everything was so vague and dim, I in the corner of sleep, not waking up, switched the resolution to FullHD. Everything is clear, the colors are good. I was glad that I had a wide channel in my dream. Is it treated or how?

An old man was charged with murdering his old lady. The crime was so obvious that none of the lawyers took to protect the poor old man. Plevako took the case, who began his speech in court with the following words:
Mr the President! Ladies and gentlemen of the jury!
After this appeal, Plevako made a considerable pause. And then again:
Mr the President! Ladies and gentlemen of the jury! A pause again.
“Mr. Plevako,” the chairman said, “if you have nothing to say, sit down.
Plevako appeals to the court again:
Mr the President! Ladies and gentlemen of the jury! I only repeated these words twice, but Mr. President made me a comment. The jurors began to look at me and talk to each other. The prosecutor stood on his chair. What was it to do to my defendant, when all his life he had only heard from his old lady: thorns, thorns, thorns...
After that, Plymouth sat down. The jury issued an apologetic verdict to the accused.

xemten: I read the Talmuds of the PTU on the tokar/fresher affairs. There in the introduction usually write - "Tokar - an interesting and promising specialty. In our country, the tokar is a respected person". I was unwilling to say "I want to go to your country!!and "

Skornyak: I was told about a couple of interesting people. Whether your uncle or grandfather died. In the Astrakhan. And they learned that it could be cheaper to be buried in Volgograd. I don’t know why, but so. And since spending on special transportation was also not interesting, they stuck in the trunk of their car - and forward, to meet the dream...