bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №136761
 11.12.2016
AAA works in Yandex

AAA: Who uses the Yandex browser?
BBB: Only for the shoulder

AAA : mm Why not be so active? He is good :)

BBB: Yes, they are cloned like chromium. As long as Chrome is

AAA is fucking. We are not cloning. There are many ideas there.

CCC: Yes, they are not new there :))))
DDD is there! The new brakes

BBB : )))

DDD: The operation lives like a victim. Even more chromium.

CCC: no well if it’s his fitch, then there are new ones :))))

AAA: I’m a developer there a little. The fucking. I would say a very good browser.

DDD: Only CryptoFox What opera that chrome that amigi and yandex is one hat
The BBB ?
AAA: We will soon release our axis
DDD: This is scary.
AAA: It is already more accurate.

DDD: Now your crazy browser and browser manager is coming out of all the gaps. And then you missed the button and you have a new axis (((

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №136760
 11.12.2016
Many billionaires are willing to read lectures as they earned the last billion, but run away from the answer. How they earned their first million.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №136759
 11.12.2016
It was in the 90s. And when again? It was in those years that the salons of black and white magic worked around, and the advertising of these salons was streamed on TV. And one young man, who had his own small advertising studio, signed up to advertise a center of black magic called "Infernalus". But here it was, the salon is like that. With a display.
The witches were greedy, the advertisement was approved, and the money was not given. How were these issues solved in those years? Obviously not in the arbitration court. He complained to a familiar bandit. They went to the sorcerers. The center of magic looked like a rough decoration – black walls, a circle of skulls, kabbalist signs, a reversed star on the floor, a goat tower with horns. Everything as required. The witches were dressed in black hats with hats, the main hair was painted in a radical black color, and in general, the owners of this institution turned out to be people bold and fearless.
When asked, "will they give him (the advertiser stood next to him) a grandmother?" the witches replied that it was only their business, and that it was not worth it to address them with such a hernia. In addition, they can curse him, the bandit, that is, so that he will regret coming to them. They are the type of magicians in the fifth generation, and if they perform one ritual, then he is a dead man. Instead of answering, the eldest of the brothers loaded the chief magician in his jaw with his right hand and said:
“B...who are you gathered to frighten, serpent? Who are you talking to, P*D? I am baptized, I give to the temple, I have a cleric. I will destroy your sorcery.
And for his faithfulness, the brother added the fell on the floor wizard several times from his foot. The wizard quickly realized that he was risking to know the horrors of the Inquisition, and said that the money right now will give back that they are in the safe. And gave it.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №136758
 11.12.2016
Heavily ill addicts of the free world from the last hand go to sports competitions and despite the toughest rehabilitation period appointed by their treating doctors, they still defeat these healthy Russian bugs, pumped with doping from cold drops.Richard McLaren

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136757
 11.12.2016
A collection of interesting facts:

Formally, bananas and tomatoes are berries.

To completely drain blood from humans, it will take 1,200,000 mosquitoes.

Bite the victim once.

In baking eggs can be successfully replaced with blood.

If you want to make a bakery, but you don’t have eggs, take three hundred thousand eggs.

The mosquitoes that pumped... and put more tomatoes! The cakes should be fruitful!


[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №136756
 11.12.2016
Do you remember actor Lee Page? Translated their hobbies?
xxx from *
YYY: Sorry, did he do something there? XD is

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №136755
 11.12.2016
My brain exploded yesterday.
I have to make an IP account.
She asks
What initials?
- IP
I know what the initials are.
The girl, IP
I know what IP is, I need the initials for the account - name, paternity
- bl@... i.p. Ivan Petrovich

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №136754
 11.12.2016
>>> This is funny here:
Do your parents know that you have lost your virginity?

When I come to my mother who lives in another city, she sleeps me with questions: how is it at work? is normal. Salary is enough? is enough. How at home? is normal. Because if you answer something else, something about the real complex situation, you will get a two-hour brainstorming about your catastrophic life rolling into the abyss. Believe me, this is never funny.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №136753
 11.12.2016
When you are interested,
What a living cat weight,
It is not time to feed the cat.
Declaration of Aural,
Or the opposite,
The cat asks in his mouth.
But the cat does not want to weigh.
Even for the sausage,
In the end, the parasite,
Which is not hanging,
Take what a pity,
We packed like a roulette.
In the heavens weigh.
We will find out about net!
Then the cat gets angry.
And it will hurt,
Your soul is pure.
You really weighed the cat! c) Volha

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №136752
 11.12.2016
Your worried mother is worried. She can no longer put on your wool socks in the cold, go to school to break your problems with teachers, meet you late in the evening at the subway, so that you can safely get home from a long birthday. But she worries for you not less, and even more than before, when she could have influenced at least something in your life. Are you old enough to forgive your mother for her worries, for wanting you to be well, and to understand that it’s all because she loves you so much?

You know, so you can offer to understand and forgive a person who suffers from jealousy, for example. "Because he loves it" Then he will go and kill. Excessively anxious people need to work on themselves, and not eat their brain with a teaspoon. It is not love, but possession and extreme disrespect, when one adult considers another adult person partially incapable, but make yourself a smart man.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №136751
 10.12.2016
Auto school in Krasnoyarsk punished after a graduate fatal accident
In addition, the management of the firm did not check whether their teachers were previously convicted and this point was not taken into account in the rules of the internal regulations.
The comments:
Q: What does this have to do with the judgment of the auto school? Is this a school for minors?
Bourgeois: And the convicted can teach badly. This is at the detriment of society. This is a very serious topic.
Lady GaGa: And what do we now do with previously convicted officials?
Von Bourbon: Not allowed to work in auto schools, right?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №136750
 10.12.2016
David Sijakhov: Even the walls hear, but if they respond, it’s already bad

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №136749
 10.12.2016
> that in such a state I am like a matte jewel

It was the mother's eggs :) And the matte eggs live in the gym, under matte carpets. Lurk teaches you, teaches you, no-hu-yachesky does not mean.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136748
 10.12.2016
In the second grade, he extinguished a fire on the stairs into the basement, filling it with leaves. I was accused of firing.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №136747
 10.12.2016
Soryan for Offtopic

In "Ironia of fate", Zhenya Lukashin and his bride Gal were invited to the New Year to some Catanians, but then decided to meet him together (which also, however, failed).

The last replica of Galli in their joint Moscow scene was - "Beyond!", in response to Zeni's dissatisfaction, which did not work well with the Catania.
If the story had turned differently—or more precisely, if life had disputed with art and won on the part of entertainment—the couple would have gone to the Catania.

And Zhenya and Gal would learn a lot of interesting things.
For example, about Sophia Loren, Love of Orlova, Faina Ranevskaya, Mironova and Menaker, Maya Plysetskaya, Nonna Mordyukova, Innocenty Smokutnovsky, Rina Green and even about Mayakovsky and Lila Brik, with whom was married Vasily Katanyan the Elder.
And Vasily Katanyan, Jr., could have introduced them to Eldar Ryazanov, one of his closest friends, who bragged about mentioning Katanyanov in his films.

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136746
 10.12.2016
and in vain,
I am 31, brother 35. We have families, children. We both get mothered, brother smokes, and both modems allow themselves to drink sometimes. But parents still don’t know that. When I’m asked why I don’t smoke, I say I can’t. As soon as my mother came to visit my brother, and he came from work with the smell of alcohol, the employee was there, so my mother began to argue, picked up things and left.
We just respect our parents.

Because they do not respect you.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №136745
 10.12.2016
All three control modules on the 787 can reboot spontaneously if not turned off for 22 days.
Mikhail Klimov: the thing is that the modules are reserved
This is why 3
but a scenario when all are not available at the same time - I'm not sure what is envisaged. The question is how long the reboot lasts and what the result is.
If you need to press any key from the console cable
This is a great Hollywood film.
How a Boeing contractor – some honeywell – hired a poor Hindu freelancer
Download the Node.js module from NMP.
He fed a large family.
And now the plane got up and got it all out, and we need a rescue hacker in the blind glasses.
which will be thrown with the rs232-usb switch to the wing but it will break, and the passengers bond the necessary cable from the old siemens a35 and the wire mount from the grandmother's cardiostimulator, which is old and it doesn't matter and she is the type of victim

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136744
 10.12.2016
Dialogue on the harm of GMOs with a religious adept (laughably twice):

XX: - GMOs are dangerous because the absorbed protein is embedded in the human code. This has long been proven. Interference in the nature of the living is contrary to the will of the Creator.

WOW: In what way? Who has proved?
Take as an example simple toilet paper and modified, multi-layer, treated with a flavor. Which paper would you like to use? What harm can a modified paper bring if you, after use - throw it away? Also modified protein: after the body uses its beneficial substances - is discarded.

XX: The paper is a good example. You won’t deny that when you use fragrance paper, the smell of your ass changes? Even after you’ve thrown that paper.)

WOW: A good example. You’re not going to claim that the molecules of the smell are embedded in the genetic code of your ass? To test this, it is enough to conduct a small, simple and absolutely free experiment: stop using modified multi-layer fragrance paper for a while. Go to the posthumous, orthodox cardboard. Or quit the paper at all. And you will be surprised how quickly the smell of your divine ass will return to the original set by the Creator in the silent settings.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136743
 10.12.2016
I tend to fix the meaning of interdomentia behind the writing of blasphemy, and the meaning of the writing of blasphemy behind the writing of substance. I don’t hear the same connotations in the word shit as in the word shit. Writing through T better expresses all the pain, bitterness, annoyance and confusion that sounds in the interdomain than writing through D, which, though rude, calls a dishonest woman.

to students. Don’t be interested in Matt. It becomes addictive and ceases to serve as anesthetic.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №136742
 10.12.2016
An advertisement was placed at the exit of the subway. The man in the costume of a giant cup of coffee must distribute the flyers. I go to the subway, there are no flashes. Like the hand in the glass. As I move past the advertiser, the limb with a cigarette is pulled out of the hole for the hand, scratching the ashes and diving back. Even coffee has bad habits.

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