bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №96003
 30.03.2014
I thought that in the 21st century all the assembly at the factories would be done by machines, and people would only watch over and control them. But for now, it is mostly the opposite. People are assembling and machines are controlling them.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №96002
 30.03.2014
According to the press service of the Central Committee of Ukraine, Dart Alekseevich Vader submitted a full package of documents, including the payment of money in the amount of 2.5 million UAH.(~273 000 $)
The construction of the Death Star will be announced soon.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №96001
 30.03.2014
From Chat:
I now heard on the radio, there is such a word, it turns out: Mamihlapinatapai (sometimes written by mamihlapinatapei, usually read as mamihlapinatapei) - a word from the Yagan language of the Yagan tribe (Fire Earth), is listed in the Guinness Book of Records as "the most comprehensive word" and is considered one of the most difficult words to translate. It means “the look between two people, which expresses the desire of each one that the other will be the initiator of what they both want, but no one wants to be first.” beautifully...
yyy is beautiful)
zzz: "tweethinking"

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №96000
 30.03.2014
The soup overheated, left to cool and forgot. and brother:
Your soup becomes an atheist.
M is?? to
He began to forget the Creator.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95999
 30.03.2014
bylpall (15:10:02) How we were called Maslopuzes in the Army
Man_uL (15:16:35) and we were rabbits
Man_uL (15:17:05) messaging across the country
bylpall (15:18:39) And we are on the tank, tank clean we are clean, from the tank we are clean tank dirty, after washing the tank clean we are like the devil one teeth glowing
Man_uL (15:23:23) )))), amused by

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95998
 30.03.2014
Citation
In one cubic kilometer of sea water dissolved 10 kg. of gold.
But to extract them (evaporation, electrolysis, etc.) It is 1000 times more expensive than ordinary...

1st You sit next to the sea.
2nd Wait until it dries.
Three Collecting the gold.
4 is The Profit!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95997
 30.03.2014
Listen to "Downton Abbey"

Without a trick? You know Grandma is coming!
Oh no! I did not know!
Do not change clothes. It’s time to know what real life is.

Anarchy in the UK.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №95996
 30.03.2014
A friend invited me for my birthday. When they went, they never thought about what to give. In the middle of the drinking, the namingman sent us with a friend for vodka. I took two bottles and went to the box. See: on the shelf near the box, among all kinds of gum condoms, there is a gel for anal sex.
I: Oh, let’s give him a joke!
Friend: Oh, what it will look like in the eyes of the saleswoman - two men buy two bottles of vodka and anal gel...

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95995
 30.03.2014
About the names.

A girl named Stephanie studied with me. Stupid was rare.
And if it were called Masha, it’t get so much in the eye.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №95994
 30.03.2014
In a technical university, there should be Linux and, accordingly, an openoffice, rather than a share for the secretary.
– – – – –
and the autocad, solid, compass, apm in the tech.vuse under the wire to launch?)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №95993
 30.03.2014
What is common between barley and milk (that barley drinks milk is not the correct answer).
– – – – –
Eggs and milk can collapse.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95992
 30.03.2014
Oh yeah yeah yeah!
How many pregnancies?
There was not. Only two abortions, one miscarriage and five unsuccessful IVF attempts. I have never been pregnant, yes.

Therefore, it is better to ask the same question three times with different words, then at least some hope is to get the necessary information. Partisans are fucking.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №95991
 30.03.2014
My 5 copies about the sound of Soviet cinema classics. In the 80s, my parents visited in Baikonur with relatives and watched Chapaeva in Kazakh:
"Thanks to me! Shooters and bars?"
"Jok, Vasily Ivanovich"

"Vasily Ivanovich They are white!"
"Thanks to you!"

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №95990
 30.03.2014
Vampire-phuist, shortened days, sewing with a cross. by mikefender

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95989
 29.03.2014
On the subject of abbreviations and abbreviations of names of subjects in the institute. I studied at a technical university, so we somehow got a subject - JESUS (information and measurement systems for the management of stands).

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №95988
 29.03.2014
My husband was travelling to Luca. I ask: Did you bring me a hotel? Without any hope, I ask, just so, clean air to shake. He is like that once! Hand in pocket. He got a bucket from there and gave it to me.
Today is March 8th, please note.
A loving man will always find something for you in his pocket, because he thinks of you when he collects cloves and when he sings songs.
To the question "what do you do?" I refuse to answer. must be!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95987
 29.03.2014
XXX: I immediately made the conclusion
Yyy: The fan you see I Yoda
zzz: “Yodi Master’s worshiper you see me.” If you speak the Jedi language, follow the norms of the language.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95986
 29.03.2014
What can I do with the perforator every Saturday? Do they do holes in the house?
2: Do the repair. They have an interior design in the style of Masdaam cheese :)

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №95985
 29.03.2014
It takes about an hour to get to space. I’m going to go to work :-(

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №95984
 29.03.2014
Tesla installs a titanium shield and aluminum detachers on the Model S bottom:
“We are confident that these changes will also help prevent fires in extremely high-speed collisions where the car can break off the wheels, as happened during another fire last year in Mexico:
The incident occurred after a car at a speed of 180 kilometers per hour entered the circular circuit, rolled out 5 meters of a concrete detector and lost the left front wheel, and then broke a two-meter concrete fence on the other side of the road, losing the right wheel, and then crashed into a tree. The driver was able to get out of the car and leave the accident site independently without serious injuries, and the fire, as in other cases, limited to the front of the car, began in a few minutes.

Sarah, and those people missed something else.

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