Before telling me a joke, remember my internet since 1994.
Do not confess your sins to your loved ones, not everyone is born a priest who forgives sins.
In the line in the store in front of me is my grandfather of the 80s. It is his turn, the cashier pierces the goods, calls the price. Daddy climbs into the pocket of the jacket and gets from there a cheap button phone type Explay or Fly, with a bank card attached to it with the help of an isolant (probably with a contactless payment function), applies the phone to the terminal of the cash machine... The terminal feeds, signaling a successful operation. Looking at the disturbing seller, the grandfather explains: "The grandson said that the card can be attached to the phone, and so pay. Very comfortable!
To be a successful politician in Russia, you only need three things:
Lack of conscience to be more comfortable stealing;
Steel nerves to calmly perceive the poverty of ordinary people, knowing that it is partly your fault;
The acting talent to pretend that you believe in the nonsense that you broadcast from TV screens about improving the quality of life of Russians.
The Ministry of Internal Affairs of Russia has repeatedly announced a tender for the purchase of a civilian passenger aircraft Tu-204-300 for 1.7 billion rubles. The document is published on the website of state procurement. Passenger aircraft with VIP apartments will be purchased at the expense of the federal budget as part of the state defense order.
I don’t think anyone is going to agree with me that the MDF is (!) We really need a plane!! With VIP apartments!!! And are you ready to finance this (the purchase at the expense of taxpayers)?
The_toad: In fact, if you look at the Krebs cycle, it’s hard not to notice that any little-small profound god would have done it better. Such a ridiculous blunder, such as the Krebs cycle, apparently arose as a result of the tail approach of evolution.
user_ami: Do you know at least one "professional god"?
The_toad: Yes, I am with many of them on a friendly foot. Sometimes I say to some Kukumats: “Well, brother Kukumats?” – “Yes, brother,” he replies, “so it’s all...”
A little news:
In Samara, the founder of anti-corruption organization will appear before the court for giving bribery
In the United States, a chicken without a head lived for about a year. Her head was cut off, but she did not die. She was fed from the pipette right into the esophagus.
The owner of the chicken toured with her around the country, earned good money.
Writing with my words xxx
Dxxx, we even have such a head of department in the company. It can even go without a pipet.
Written by LXXXX
A BDSM dating site? Hm In principle, the development of this resource
and short. When your cat suddenly
Healthy and healthy today.
He did not hit the crystal, he did not hit the coat.
Fuck what you have to do in the pot.
The rest is vanity!
The cat hunger.
Look at the cat!
Fingerprints of human hands remain on many surfaces: in the subway, on perils, etc. Therefore, they do not represent special secrecy.
But here are the fingerprints – behind this is the future of authorization!
At night, a family of ducks settled in my pool - a mother duck and a wreath of small ducks. They swear everything, in the real sense.
Baby in the morning: Dad, can I leave a duck for myself? I will take care of him and feed him, and when he grows up, we will sow him!
For the past six months, she has constantly taken her 12-year-old son's magazine GEO, each monthly issue is usually devoted to some city or landmark of the country. The child liked to read, but recently suddenly outraged and said: "Mom, how much can you read about cities???" I have geography at school! Take GEO on another topic..mmm...for example..." and after a short reflection (ooo, I'm now learning what's interesting for today's teens) continues joyfully "...about THE END OF THE WORLD!!and "
The news:
Nevada has declared a state of emergency due to marijuana shortage.
The commentary:
With the marijuana shortage, the people of Nevada faced a harsh reality.
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12.07.2017
My uncle got me somehow. I never touched my finger, but I brought it here. I smoked, cameled, self-affirmed... I was fourteen years old, my parents died for two years, a shorter, bad period.
So, my uncle took off his belt and even almost stumbled on me, but nothing happened. Inhuman, he says, and dangerous. Suddenly the kidneys will fly... I began to loudly override and reject options, everything was wrong. Rosemary is not possible, because the winter and the city, the stoves in the house did not run, the clutch dirty unhygienically, the wire is painful, the line is not smooth, the green carpet blaster is ridiculous... In short, when I began to suggest my options, we realized that nothing from this idea would work. So I remained unbeaten, so they roared like two idiots.
Serving as a soldier is guaranteed brain dilution, a jacket is just a waste of time. The only rule is a staff officer, because they pay for the wrong, and you do nothing to do.
YYY: and if the leg is torn off - in the mess, a wooden will be given, a mothershed poppy and a black mark!
I have received an order of "organic" cosmetics. I open the package, it is pleasant, but suddenly smells like some sort of hmmeli-suneli. Expectation: Tested with Indian sections. Reality: the probe was laid - a Chinese pad with a therapeutic phytosphere. It smells right through the packaging. No, hmmeli-suneli in "moisture" no, but there is mint pepper. The feeling is fire. This is all you need to know about Chinese cosmetics.
Stalin was a bloody tyrant.
Citizen, let us go by. You are arrested for insulting the feelings of believers in Stalin.
With LOR:
by Jopich1:
After buying the next pack of beer I was convinced that the brewers are lying and deceiving - instead of 0.5 add 0.4. What is a conspiracy?
and Xellos:
When milk began to be packed at 950 - I was silent, I don't drink milk.
When the strawberries started to be packed at 875 - I was silent, I didn't eat strawberries.
I always thought that a joke is when both sides laugh, not one. This is not a joke, but a ridicule or humiliation. This also applies to joke.