bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №102859
 16.09.2014
Yesterday after work went into the "Verny" for water, hit the cashier of the trainee, a young guy of some sort, he burned the zucco there :) The man stood in front of him with 2 packs of tuborg for 4 banks, so he beat him not 8 cans, but the barcode from the pack 8 times. It ended up like a beer box. The man stands, looks at how he beat and says, "A little more and enough for the jigguli! and :)

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №102858
 16.09.2014
here here :

In a burning battle about an ambulance. A friend in the one worked, told about cases when because of such challenges, but the temperature is high, the head hurts they did not have time to get to the road or an accident and save someone's life. And how many idiots they see every day you can’t even imagine.
Well, in addition, ambulance doctors are people who now have just collected a person after an accident in parts in a literal sense, and then have to go to the deadly sick to beat down the temperature.
_________________________________________

Working with people is hard, it is well known. Once you have chosen this job, you have to get used to it. Doctors themselves are far from angels, although emergency practitioners, according to my observations, are often much more professional than those who work in hospitals.

Cold and cough on a strong frost... Believe me, it’s not a problem yet. Much worse than diarrhea with sclerosis... You run and don’t remember where.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102857
 16.09.2014
This is:
Everything goes according to plan (c)

Flying at all. We need to know the classics.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №102856
 16.09.2014
Review of "The Wolf of Wall Street"
zeferor wrote (a):

During the scene of kissing Leonardo DiCaprio and Joanna Lamley, Leonardo was so nervous that it took 27 dubs to shoot the scene as needed.

Is he nervous? He is beautiful!! The clever guy...

gixnax Átha wrote(a):

She is 67 years old

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №102855
 16.09.2014
News in one line: Egypt has offered “AutoVAZ” cooperation with the state company Nasr.

To doubt that the car is standing in a damned place is becoming more and more difficult.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102854
 16.09.2014
<CTpaHoe> correspondence in the chat. Participants: Milashka, Ninja and Ivan Kakashkin
<CTpaHHoe> provider representative, executive director and IT director discuss the terms of the contract

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №102853
 16.09.2014
I listen to Queen Made in Heaven... I’m amazed at Freddie Mercury’s courage! Deadly sick, with pneumonia, managed to sing two albums half a year before his death. This is bleaching!

yyy: Dima, I understand that 38.2 and all things...but you, @lord, don’t relax there!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №102852
 16.09.2014
On the 4pda discussion of a smartphone with a leak lens, which is more a camera than a smartphone:
111: soon will be smart with the film release
222: Sony has long been producing smarts with film.
333: Yes, many release with films)) I take the film right away)
444: Please do not throw the film - I will take it to the greenhouse)))

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №102851
 16.09.2014
Interfax: The Kozhevnik beer factory decided to start the production of Mozarella.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №102850
 16.09.2014
Conversation with the labor protection engineer at the construction site:
3 liters of vodka and bottles! What else do you need from the medical point?"

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №102849
 16.09.2014
How can you hear the difference in the sound of a Fender guitar for 6 thousand rubles, for 60 thousand and for 200?

Buy the first, second and third for your money.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №102848
 16.09.2014
Kissing a smoking girl is like licking a ashes.
Kissing a non-smoking girl is like licking a washed ashes.
Kissing a washed girl is like kissing a non-smoking ashes.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №102847
 16.09.2014
It is not funny...
I was 17 years old, just after the New Year’s Eve, January 2nd. The temperature did not fall. And still a little sick stomach, not stronger than with PMS, but the period is not suitable, and there were no complaints on the stomach before that. Yes Yes Yes! I have called you, my "Dear" doctors. I heard that I lay down and eaten the salad, I could not convince, and the stomach at palpation hurt the same way as without it, on the recommendation I drank no-shpu... released, overnight called again, did not take again. I waited for the day and on the no-shpe went to the hospital myself... This is what I did: called - come, you can't determine what happened in the apartment - go to the clinic with the equipment. He has undergone three cavity operations. At home, we only had a thermometer and a pressure measurement apparatus, and this is all the knowledge and capabilities of the average person, who had almost never been sick before.
With disrespect for the impostors, who do not have a place in the profession, the 25-year-old disabled of the first group.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №102846
 16.09.2014
At work: they call the worker, I answer with a cheerful voice: the company is like that, I am called like that, I listen to you! I am answered - fucking, a drug addict - and hang the phone... Here to cry or laugh.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №102845
 16.09.2014
Kirill_T: I said and will say: the dollar is an extremely unstable currency. Everything jumps and jumps up. While the ruble has been stable for several hundred years = 100 kopecks,

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №102844
 16.09.2014
Neighbors are pleased.
It is forbidden to smoke and feed cats.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102843
 16.09.2014
I am a real alpha predator. I eat meat with blood, vegetables with blood, fast food with blood, peelings, eggs and even ice cream with blood. from human. Visits to the dentist:

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102842
 16.09.2014
We go with a friend around the city, we see an advertisement - "speaking flowers", she is so thoughtful: "children are sold"

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №102841
 16.09.2014
proud of her mother.

The tax service monitors the atmosphere at the workplace. She fills out a questionnaire for employees.

Question: “What positive points do you see in your work?”
High level of technical equipment. At least: we have the most powerful servers in the city.

Question: “Is it considered a prestigious job in your institution in your city?”
Mother : No. Few people know that we have the most powerful servers in the city.

My mother is Sisadmin at the City Tax Inspectorate. \m /

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №102840
 16.09.2014
Hot news: Kabaeva agrees to head the board of directors of “National Media Group”

"Well, how do you live,
Since when have you been taken to the gardens?
We often starved in the garden.
What kind of work do you do?"

"To happiness it is a sin to roar, the roar replies,
My Lord has no soul in me.
I am happy and happy,
I eat and drink on silver.
I’ll crawl with the barrel; and if I’m tired,
I roll on carpets and a soft sofa. c) the wings

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