My comrade made a presentation for colleagues and bosses about what he has done in the past six months and what results he has obtained. Slide down to 25-30. He showed the direct leader, and he said:
– Everything is great, only you show it tomorrow at the meeting, and there are millions of other questions. You have five minutes and you have nothing to do. Make a shortened version, the first two slides and the last two, and put it entirely in the intranet. Whoever is interested will see later.
- I know I am our people, nobody will look specifically. Unfortunately, the results are interesting and important.
Come up with something if you can.

Comrade invented it. Edited several frames in the middle, added to the charts and tables Sasha Grey and a couple of stars in swimsuits. At the meeting, he showed the first two slides, then scrolled to the end - not too quickly, but not very slowly, so that something body-rosa flashed on the screen, but could not be considered in detail. The full presentation, he said, look at the intranet.

Then I checked the logs – a complete success. Everyone without exception found the time, carefully read his presentation. The results of the work were also studied. Why looked so carefully? Because in the intranet he posted the original version, without the girls.

U.S. President Joe Biden said in a letter to Congress that the actions of the Russian government represent an “extreme threat” to national security and the U.S. economy.
The Finger! I would say that the actions of the Russian government pose an extreme threat to the security and economy of Russia.

My grandmother was born shortly before the war. She became the third child in the family. When the war began, she became ill, she was placed in a hospital, treated for a long time and even sent by plane to a distant city for surgery. Her mother did not return to the hospital. It sounds awful, but I will not write about the reasons for this. I want to tell you, from my grandmother’s words, one story. The grandmother was 3 or 4 years old, and they with the children and an educator from the children's home returned from the river, where they were swimming. Summer, hot, wet children walk along the dusty road that leads through the field. And the grandmother shattered her legs to blood because of the wet floats, and walked behind everyone and quietly cried. At that time, alongside the children on the same river went the company (?) The soldier, and one soldier noticed the crying girl, and when he found out why, he got a nose cloth and bound her wounds on her legs so that they didn't crack on each other. The grandmother still remembers the motif (drawing) on that nasal wrap, and in her youth she often wrapped it on her wipes.

Beginning of the 90s. The ruble jumps like a roast. I work in a cottage. Parallel to me, in one of the rooms, a man works, a stove (so he called himself), puts a fireplace. My name is Sergey, 50+ years old. Furniture in the third generation. It works carefully, not in a hurry. A fireplace with expressions. I wonder, on smoking, at lunch, I approach, I wonder what and how. Sergey is not “thirsty,” he tells, shows, explains. The young man! (I even remember what I recorded, mostly the proportion of the fireplace.) Naturally, the conversation also came about the price, in that troubled and difficult time. Sergey and then did not "break" and reject, but said straight and simply:

- You won't believe the Obserwator, but the price I have is still Soviet - 2 TONNES OF BENSIN... Gasoline is liquid, but in our country it is the hardest currency!

I, when I lived in the new building, on the 22nd floor, heard how on the 20th floor the sugar in tea (or coffee) was mixed! On 23, the neighbor narcissist was there, and his mushroom was constantly playing very quietly, and some of the compositions I liked were chassameled from the phone. A neighbor from the 21st floor came to work at 5.45. And they had sex, up to 5.50, then cries with morbidities up to 6.10, and at 6.15 she went to work, and you could sleep in silence. And on January 1, at 8.30 a.m., a fool began to hike with a perforator on the 6th floor. It was unforgettable. They almost shot each other. Beyond his floor - the neighboring apartments, was aware of all the conversations, even those that were a whisper! I have lived in a private house for more than 5 years, but there is still a residual phenomenon - listening to music in the headphones, and speaking in half a tone. And if the child screams - first thoughts for "neighbors", and then goes away.

I remembered the story of a five-year-old comrade.

His sister started dating a new guy. They were about 20 years old then.

The boy swallowed her head with fables that he could not take a loan. And if she fits in the loan and they take his car, he will ride her and drive her wherever she wants. This foolish lady went without words and they flew on the wings of love to the branch of a bank.

(Seems to be green or blue)

Everything went according to plan. According to the plan of the bank:

Thus, to the years not many, then accordingly, the conditions of slavery. The amount is more than necessary + insurance + many months of overpayment with horse interest. Approval in one step.

Fortunately or unfortunately, the banking system interfered. and specifically:

Identification of trusted persons and their telephones.

The girl blinking the eye called the phone and the data of the bat.

When the employee of the bank called the number to check the information and informed on what issue he was calling, he changed his face and probably dropped the man into his office chair.

My father was a military. He pumped such speech into the tube, that probably now this bank has forever put this girl on the blacklist.

The loan was refused. The girl at home received great stars.

The boy disappeared almost in a few days. The girl’s dad has nothing to do with it. Love has suddenly ended.

If our culture masters less taught us life, they would have much more time left for creativity.

One day I told my friends on April 1 that, say, the Americans were very sleepy: everyone at the entrance to the plane would be forced to blow in the tube, and whoever found a pair of alcohol - will not be allowed. I believed everything! Some were angry because they were going to fly to the United States.

Unfortunately, I don’t have much to do on April 1. I try as I can. Damage and flight of fantasy distinguished me from my childhood. I had a classmate Igor. I admired and appreciated him: he accompanied me, and even one day in the first class, he took from me a dropping bag of milk, which was given to us on the extension, and brought it to my house. After that, I decided to marry him, which scared the family. But all these plans disappeared when we turned eight. Igor came to my house for a visit. Just the first April. I first just wanted to show him the various interesting things I read in Perelman's Interesting Physics. She lubricated the needle with butter and carefully put it in a glass of water. The needle was swimming.

Igor was surprised and asked how it was. The first movement of the soul was to tell him about the surface tension, even though I myself had not yet understood it well. But then my true essence took over, and I began to lie inspired.
- You know, my dad works in a secret laboratory, they are given special needle oil for testing. They are soaked with needles, they do not drown. They want to change the composition a little so that the iron ship can be soaked, and it did not sink either!

Igor believed, told in school and at home about the latest developments. My excuses for April 1st were not taken into account. Very offended. I had to look for other men. It would be a good party!

Rosstat a reduction in poverty by increasing mortality.

In 2012, I bought my child the first cell phone, that would go to 1st class with a cell phone and was on the communication. A few months later, the collectors began to call. Looking for a Larissa. He explained, wrote letters to the collector’s office, the cellular operator and the sportlot. Everything is useless. Called 5-10 times a day.

...

It has been 9 years and the debt is all sold and the next collectors are not there and will call, but not so intensely. 2-3 times a month. The biggest break was when I said I know where Larisa works and gave the address of the LDPR Department in Labytang.

However, there is a small plus in this story.

The child most often does not receive calls from unknown numbers. If you take it no longer scares when from an unknown number scream or threaten or require to name an address, surname or something else.

Grow excellent immunity to phone spammers and divorces.

I was driving with a taxi driver this morning, the mood is great, and he has such a nice smell of baths in the cabin, like pine pines, resin, oak!

I say to him, “You have such a good smell of bathroom.”

He kept silent and replied, “This is my garage burned.”

Go ahead silently.

In the university we had a variety of lecturers and lecturers. Just watching a person could make life easier for themselves at the exam.

One of the lecturers was a guy, 30, call him Petro Ivanovich (PI). He is not a boy, but already at this age defended the doctorate!

So, over the course of the semester I concluded for myself that this person loves order and punctuality, even the tiny pieces laying on the table in some order 😂 Some professors wiped the board with a sleeve or the bottom of the jacket and drew lines as needed. No line - take a chair and draw a straight with the help of a chair. What nonsense am I writing? Is it easier to paint by hand? ! to It may be easier, but why did one of our lecturers use a chair as a lineup? So is so. The contrast between people is noticeable.

Here is the exam. Pi comes with a lot of tickets. I value the quality of the paper. It looks like the tickets are fresh, printed and cut before the exam. Maybe it seemed. And it does not matter. Next, I bet on the fact that the tickets in the stack are ordered: the last from above, the first from below. If this is not the case, then you will have to buy a ticket.

The whole audience is sitting, the lecturer decomposing the tickets, and I look and try to see where he puts the 4th ticket (which I knew well). Then I go and get my ticket, yes.

I have a fourth ticket :D

I came to the address, went up to the floor, I ring the door, a man opens, I give the bag and check, I say to pay by check.

The man turns around and cries, “Ola, you ordered some shit again. A woman comes out and they get into a mess, as if I wasn’t there. That only in this dispute is not, they remember everything they can, insult each other. Then the woman went into the room, and the man followed her with screams. I was at the door, I was forgotten. In general, I waited for 15 minutes until they stopped screaming and remembered me. Suddenly everything smelt, the man comes out and says, “Sorry, boy, we are sitting in the apartments at a distance. Tired of each other. There was a reason to argue, the couple wanted to release. Thanks for your patience.” I paid for the order, and the teas gave :)

I had to work in one company. The working schedule was strictly stipulated. How much to eat, how much to eat, and so on. And it would only be suitable for workers on the conveyor and assembly workshops. But also for different workers.

And there was a fool among the bosses who loved to punish for it. I also received a fine. I smoked not on schedule. To my explanation that ten minutes ago, when it was my "smoking" time, I was engaged in shipping the goods to the buyer, he didn't care.

very well. I started stopping unloading/loading if I had a break on schedule. It came to the owner. How is it that the customer has come to pick up the goods for several million, and Skoffin, having not loaded the last pallet, stumbles the loader, takes the keys and goes for half an hour to lunch? In response, I pointed to the schedule and explained that once I was already fined for violating it. No need a second time.

I don't know what they were talking about there (the owner and the fool), but after a while the director approached me and said that from now on I am directly subject to the head of the warehouses, and I can't care about the fool. As for breaks, it is all in my opinion, the main condition is that loading / unloading goes without stopping.

A wise ruler develops the country’s economy.

A cowardly dictator is propaganda and repression.

I have a good companion, let’s say Miron, now a young man. He is a childhood disabled - polio, walks with great difficulty, relying on a rod, but the saturation of the biography is enough for ten healthy and still remains. I will try to tell one of his stories.

He then lived in Makievka, worked in the mine. Not in the mine, of course, but in the mine management. They had money, had good friends, had a fun company, often drank together. Friends went to the crawl, and Miron with them, of all the exercises he could only snatch the rod lying, this was what he did. Once I heard that there would be a world powerlifting championship among disabled people in Hungary, just lying on the floor, and I thought what if not to go there. Further from his face, for minor inaccuracies, please do not pin, I did not turn on the dictionary, tell me how I remembered.

“We had to start the Ukrainian tournament. Last month, I did not exercise at all. Coming to the medical unit for a certificate, the mesister says: you have high pressure, not for loads. I: Okay, I will not be stressed, yes, completely, that is, halfway, just to get to the World Cup. I come, and there all the guys do not read me, former athletes, disabled became after injury - amputation or a vertebral fracture, but still the catches are the ones. I dropped 120 kilos, nothing at all. Normal weight starts at 160. I went to the coach and said:
Take me when I get to Europe. A month before the championship, I will be training, I promise to bring a medal.
He looked at it with doubt, but said:
“You don’t have a budget, but if you find $400, go for your own. There is a seat in the bus, half a squad. Well, that is, five stitches, two working legs on all. And in your weight category we have none, the rest are all lightweight.

Well, I scratched 400 bucks and came to Budapest. They all stayed together in a hotel, ate together, and I was a mansion. I came to the gym late, lightweights already started to compete. I see that in my category up to 100 kg three participants registered, and in the next over 100 - only one German.

I think: you have to get into 100+, then the silver medal is guaranteed. He weighed 98 kg with pennies. I went to the buffet, took two liters of juice, I remember, they only had cherry. Two liters of beer would be poured into yourself without problems, but beer is not possible, doping control. Pip-drinked this juice, some of it drank. Another coin in the socks was pushed and weighed. 100 kg and 100 grams.

The German in the first attempt ordered 130 kg, and I - 115, to be sure to take, then the medal and points to the team in the team count. He saw that I was so weak and said the second weight was 140. I’m also 140, it’s my personal record, but if I take it, I’m ahead because I’m lighter. He takes easy, and I am at the limit of strength. There are strict rules, the bar should go strictly horizontally, you cannot wait. It happened, I counted.

There is a third attempt. I have a chance if he orders a lot of weight and doesn’t take it. But he is a German, accuratist, ordering a minimum of 142.5, to be sure. And he is wrong, the stick went wrong, he did not count the attempt. All in all, I became a champion. The coach rushes to embrace me: no one else in the Ukrainian team took gold, I brought the most points. In the team rankings, Ukraine shares 3-4 place out of 12 countries. Later, I was fed with the team, and I did not go back to the end of the bus by the mansion, but with all the boys."

Then Miron began to exercise seriously, pushed out 180 kg and more, won a few more medals and even went to the Paralympics. There, indeed, did not shine, but there is also a story about it, I will tell you if you like this one.

Patriarch Kirill vaccinated against the coronavirus. Ordinary methods don’t help anymore.)

Once arranged for one job, and there was a cowardly colleague. I sat opposite each other in the office, and I noticed that he often looked at me with one eye because of the comp. It was not in itself a pipet, but somehow loudly to say, absolutely unfamiliar people were. And so it lasted for a while until I went somehow to drink a beer with another colleague and told him the story about these strange things with contemplations. On what a colleague stunned and says that it is not a strabismus, but an eye prothesis, and he does not actually see them.

What is the difference between the Soviet and modern system?
Those who now burn the country’s budget, in the old days, would burn the forest.

In the mid-1960s, wooden houses were demolished in the district of Parglovo in Leningrad, freeing space for new residential construction. In the courtyard of the displaced house, the workers found a surprising object - a grave, over which a obelisk with a attached photo was raised. From the photo looked a dog with large intelligent eyes - a mixture of the "dvorterier" with a racer. The signature read: "To Dear Friend Treasurer (1939 - 1945) of the rescued ones.” It was clear that the monument was somehow connected with the events of the blockade, and did not take it down, and through the passport table began to look for former residents of the house.

A week later, a gray man came to the yard and carefully took a photograph of the dog from the obelisk. He said to his builders:

This is our treasury! He saved us and our children from hunger. I will hang his photo in a new apartment.

The man told an amazing story.

In the autumn of 1941, the outskirts of the northern areas of the city relatively little suffered from shelling and bombing, the main strikes of the Germans were on the central part of Leningrad. But hunger came here, including a wooden house for four families, each of which had children.

The common favourite of the court was Treasury - a playful and sensible dog. But one October morning there was nothing to pour into the dog’s bowl, except water. The dog stood, I think. and disappeared. The residents breathed with relief - there is no need to look into the hungry dog's eyes. But the treasury did not disappear. By lunch he returned home, carrying a rabbit caught in his teeth. It was enough for lunch for all four families. Trebucha, legs and head were given to the main predator.

Since then, the Treasury has started bringing rabbits almost daily. The suburban fields of the desolate Soviet farms were filled with unharvested crops - in September the front approached the city. Cabbage, carrots, potatoes, beets remained in the pit. The rabbits are divided. They have grown up a lot.

In the families of the courtyard regularly cooked broths of rabbit. Women learned to sew warm winter sweaters from skins, exchanged them for non-smoking tobacco, and exchanged tobacco for food.

Treasury hunting expeditions suggested another rescue route: children with saucers walked on snow-filled fields and excavated potatoes, cabbage, beets. Let them be frozen, but foods.

No one died in this house during the blockade. On the New Year's Eve on December 31, children even installed a tree tree, and on the branches together with toys were hanging real chocolate candy, which were exchanged from the army rearmen for a rabbit caught by the Treasurer.

They survived the blockade. Already after the Victory, in June 1945, the Treasury, as usual, went to hunt in the morning. After an hour, he came to the yard, leaving a bloody trace. He exploded in a mine. The smart dog, apparently, felt something, had time to jump back, so he did not die immediately. He died in his hometown.

The inhabitants of the house cried over him, like over a loved one who left his life. He was buried in the courtyard and a monument was erected. When they moved to a new home, they forgot about it.

The man asked the builders:

If you can, don’t build the treasure tomb. Put the el at this place. Let the kids have a tree in the winter. As then, on December 31, 1941. In memory of the treasury.

The inhabitants of the high-rise new building are already accustomed to the fact that a large beautiful tree grows near one of the entrances. And not many know that it is planted in memory of the blocked dog. She saved 16 Leningraders from starvation.

Alexander Smirnov

by St. Petersburg