bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №95092
 10.03.2014
To tears touched the tragedy in the news story of a man who returned from abroad, where for several hundred thousand made a hair transplant. On the joys on the way home, he was drunk, strongly bullied, was detained by the police, convicted and shaved.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №95091
 10.03.2014
Was there a grandfather in Hogwarts?
YYY: Moreover, Snow even purchased frogs through underground witches!
zzz: (dreaming) Yes, one repair can replace so much...

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №95090
 10.03.2014
This is:

The child in the queries: "Gauss gun with his own hands"
Something I am worried about...

— — —
Don’t worry, my childhood friend and I also tried to collect it. It is even good.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95089
 10.03.2014
Children under the window.

The rat! The Rat!! to
to stand!
The dog is small!
The Fucks!! to
Stand up, rats, hands up, weapons on the ground!
Even if you know what you are saying, she has no weapons at all!

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №95088
 10.03.2014
Well, as the saying goes: shake, da pory - there will be no empty time.
XXX: I am about rebuilding.
yyy: "Shea da Pori" sounds like something French.
My grandmother always said so.
XXX: She told her mother.
XXX: She was a bitch.
Oh, and she is Napoleon!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №95087
 10.03.2014
shshifter: the statistical probability of dying - the micromort is called
shshifter: 1 millionth chance of death
sable-fuzzy: kind of like
shshifter: 1 micromort is contained in 1.5 cigarettes, in half a litre of wine, in 2 days of life in New York. in 1000 bananas)) (dose of radiation)
shshifter: and all that.
Sable-Fuzzy is clear. Volandemort is like a dohullion of micromorts.

[ + 26 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95086
 10.03.2014

Any work you pay for is a branch of hell.
You can’t become a ranch, become a philosopher.

From personal experience:
The less they pay, the hotter the villas. Where you are well paid, it is usually enough to work well. Not everyone can do that.

The hell is the lowest paid job. Because the employer thinks these are nowhere from him, otherwise they would have been gone long ago.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №95085
 10.03.2014
goalkeeper of Finnish women's hockey team Noora Ryatou will defend the goal of the men's team "Kiekko-Vanta" next season

And you are here Chelyabinsk, Chelyabinsk.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95084
 10.03.2014
Gugliem decision of the Russian Academy of Mathematics of March 3, 2008, adopted following the results of the World Congress of Mathematicians, held from February 25 to March 1, 2008.

According to him, 0^0 is no uncertainty and no unit, but completely itself 0.

Thus 0^0 + 0^0 = 0

This is very similar to the phrase from an anecdote: "In wartime, the value of pi is equal to 4".

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №95083
 10.03.2014
A narrow thinking:

This is one of the most important things in the world.
Do you work at home every day from 9 to 23? A pensioner? If you do, you will either hate it or not, you will not be able to do it.

And so - try whether to work, or study to go, or go to the street, go for a walk, to the library.

This is one of the most important things in the world.
Didn't you think everyone works strictly from 8 to 17 five days a week?
People, when you have already removed the chains from your brains and ceased to think patternly...

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №95082
 10.03.2014
xxx> I can ask your opinion.
xxx> as a man
yyy> let it go
yyy> for every case scratched the forearm with the word "man"

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №95081
 10.03.2014
xxx: You understand that this little nursing cat has grown up and turned into a Cat, when he, by the habit of drawing the curtains, tears off his nails all the carnage...

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №95080
 10.03.2014
to this:

Only now realized that black and white cats are smarter than cats of other colours. I have 7 cats in my family, two of them are black and white and only they fall into the toilet all the other fucking where they fell.

It is Mafia. Others are not allowed


[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №95079
 10.03.2014
I lie on the couch, reading quotes of a year old, loudly a sick loved one, lying next to and eating grapes. I get to this:

Before the meeting, the director tells: "Scientists have proven that the smarter an individual, the less she lives."
A secretary passes by and with an undisclosed annoyance: "Devil!".

I get up to check what is it that I am lying so cold and I realize that there is a pot cover under me. Further dialogue
I do not have a vineyard in my mouth.
I: I am lying on the cover of the pot.
L: Yes, we will live in Dooolgo

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №95078
 10.03.2014
Oleg is wild. "Coursework"

I can no longer have any appetite. I joke because I have to. I drink when it is poured. It’s all purely from principle. Gusev, you’re smart, tell me when will it all end?
“And you shot,” Gusev advised.
The leader whispered recklessly:
I tried a hundred times. I lift up the cock, look into the dool and I understand – nothing holds me back. I can press, you know? Just simply. And it’s so boring... And then I remember: I’m going to work tomorrow. Would something funny happen? So I live.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95077
 10.03.2014
“When the Union collapsed, Russia stole the only aircraft carrier from Ukraine...Now Ukraine has stolen the only new electricity in Crimea. The 6-year-old electric car is the newest, four-wheeled, just a pearl.

It means tickets.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95076
 10.03.2014
It’s fun to do stupid things with smart people.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95075
 10.03.2014
Their accuracy is +/- 50 years.
Here is a simple and accurate test:
1st How old are you?

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №95074
 10.03.2014
This husband :

If a husband does something without the instructions of his wife (for example, he buys powder instead of taking from a box for shoes with pots), he will be punished by all the severity of the family relationship.
And the aunt just pumps up the scales of education."

My sympathy to you. How do you breathe without permission?
We have a family principle: make a man, don’t speak by hand, don’t like how – do it yourself.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95073
 10.03.2014
The human body is perfect. Absolutely no idea where it will be in the morning after drinking in an Irish pub.

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