bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №79185
 24.03.2013
Review of Vampire: The Mascarade
A: Whoever owns information, he governs the world!
B: The nodes are running!
A: The anti-delivery are running! Nosferas are savory!
B: Vampires generally suck, regardless of the clan and the universe.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №79184
 24.03.2013
From correspondence on the provider's forum.

Anboder (19:00:00) And yet, your specialist promised today to be from 16 to 18. But it’s gone, just like 1% of my packages!

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79183
 24.03.2013
the beginning of the recipe of the Uzbek plow: "Sat your wife and her girlfriend carefully overw..."

[ + 31 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79182
 24.03.2013
XX: What does Valuev do in the Duma?
YYY: He thinks what he thinks

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №79181
 24.03.2013
Zkir: Most of all, programmers are like a cat who brings a mouse to his master, either to express his attitude or to teach him to hunt. But that man does not eat mice and is not able to hunt them, cats are uncomfortable.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №79180
 24.03.2013
I will bring you a dream.
WOW is meaningful?
You will know what to dream about.
WOW: I know and so - a drummer dreams: I want to sneeze, a naked grandmother dreams - it is time to visit Olka, a dreamer dreams - you need to eat. What is missing is dreaming.
HH: With your logic it looks strange what you dreamed yesterday))))
It is terrible to imagine what you miss if you dreamed of JIGURDA O_O

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №79179
 24.03.2013
If you suddenly have an insurmountable urge to kill, do not be afraid, this is a normal reaction when changing the distribution.

[ + -15 - ] Comment quote №79178
 24.03.2013
Fuck the shit from here. Everyone who summarizes “all the babies, all the men,” put two strapon in your ass and calm down. Fuck your heels to see here.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №79177
 24.03.2013
We go for a walk, we go to the cinema.
A cup of coffee)
I don’t drink coffee.
A very clever man once said to me, “Whoever doesn’t drink coffee isn’t a fucker.”
I seem to understand the reason for my failures on the personal front

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №79176
 24.03.2013
I once in my youth foolishness cooked a cat with a sausage with mustard.Eat a cat.Eat and cry.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79175
 24.03.2013
Nordica: Koreans came to our office today, presented the fourth helicopter. He is so cool! There were so many bats in it. For example, it measures air temperature and body temperature. You sit like this, what’s wrong with me, maybe I have a fever? I pushed the phone to the wrist, and he measured the temperature like a thermometer.
So there is no diabetic? You drop him blood, and he has your blood sugar level?
Nordica: ah, and in pink phones built-in pregnancy test))

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №79174
 24.03.2013
I sent a letter. And the girl behind the stand, designing it, suggests to me: "Maybe, through an airplane? It is more expensive, but faster!" I jumped out on her, and then ten minutes of laughter could not... From Moscow to Moscow by plane!))

He laughed in vain. This kind of traffic is really faster!

[ + 26 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79173
 24.03.2013
Is there anyone who downloads movies with 40 GB?
The movie theaters?

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №79172
 24.03.2013
Dzhel: Someone got into her mind that if you don’t know something in a conversation, you should try to show what you know and say something. As a result, the Holocaust became a Jewish holiday, Garrielle Garcia Marquez – an American writer, and for dinner we almost ordered Omar Khayama instead of the marine representative of the carcasses.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №79171
 24.03.2013
...in the innet appeared so many photos of Pugacheva, as she badly lost weight. In the meantime, she just moved her head.
and Jokx :)

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №79170
 24.03.2013

The guy:
The name of the man, the cat labs leads by bd
Let me go to you tomorrow, do we do it? Did you have any plans?
The girl:
Oh, please, let it be a shit.
This is not a database.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №79169
 24.03.2013
Now on a trip to London, I joked before leaving for work - such as a polonium vessel on the task of the FSB to London and with Berezovsky, something needs to be resolved.
I think I will be at work on Monday.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №79168
 24.03.2013
XHH: I am practicing in school as a computer science teacher. Today I call a guy to the board to solve a simple program on Pascal. He stands, is dumb, cannot handle the operation of whole-number division. I suggest him solve the column and understand that there is a mod, that there is a div, but he refuses.
YYY : Why? The child of the calculator did not find a decision in the column?
This miracle tells me that you cannot use multiplication and division, but you must use only addition and deduction.
YYY: 0_0 man processor! to

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79167
 24.03.2013
Conference on 3D graphics
<suomi> docks are read only by losers and miserables. True samurai 3D graphics always model by naïveté! This glass looks like a straw goblin.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №79166
 24.03.2013
xxx: reminded me when I was still working at Procter & Gamble.
Report of the Marketer:
We are launching a new shampoo.
- Focus groups most liked the phrase "contains mineral oils"!
That’s why we’re going to write on shampoos.
Although this is strange, because the only mineral oil is processed oil.
But in the shops and buyers do not have to say this.

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