My house burned today. We lie in bed and rest. She reveals: I had the best sex in my life! Remember the date! Today is March 23. It is easy! Today is my mother’s birthday. Where is the phone? Need to call urgently!

She: It is your fault!
He: In what?
It is: in everything!
He: I am not involved in 9/11 and the genocide of Jews

Oksana (16:43:56 24/03/2011)What types of anti-human executions do you know?
camer (16:44:51 24/03/2011)I may be wrong, but I think all the executions are a bit anti-human

Today on the 1st pair (naturally, still sleeping) the paddle whispered that it is not good to sleep in pairs. He twisted and silenced... Then we heard the knock and the matyugs of the teaching – it turns out that the smart man himself fell asleep. stood

Today, after hearing the name of the company that produces sausage in the store (there was a tasting), I first thought I heard it, but seeing this on the forehead of the promoter's girl, I realized that there are still people in Russia with a non-standard fantasy.
are ready?
Company "Pepper Metalist" O_o

Let’s start with two liters for each.
I : go out for me!!!! ))))

It was. It also reproduces.

We have a client at ADSL, the Orthodox Church. Modems we issue to subscribers different, including Huawei. My dad calls and says the internet doesn’t work. Tech Support asks the standard question, which modem he has. In response: "Well, with no godly name at all..."

Or Epic Fail? I’ll tell you what an Epic Fail is.
He went to work in the morning, slipped, fell, beat the joint of his right hand. I go out of the injury, in the pocket of the 5-thousand note, you need to exchange, I go to the bank... attention, a guy goes into the bank, in the coat, a wild look (in the injury the hand was fixed), the right hand in the pocket and does not remove it, a quick step goes to the box office.
The guard grabs his right hand and pulls (the shit is so painful!) with a shout full of pain I turn and give him in the mouth with my left hand.... fly 3 more mouthworms, put on the floor and turn my hands.... in 2 hours I appear again in the trauma point.... in the end I go home with 2 fractures of my right arm and a sick joint.....
Is this Epic Fail?? to
No such stuff.
I go home (I came in the afternoon and not in the evening as usual from work) and at home my wife with a lover... in the end I chase this fool down the stairs, at the exit of the entrance I slide down... again the same injury point... a fracture of the left arm... the doctors are already rubbing the whole composition....
I sit at home, both hands in the plaster, my wife to my mother collapsed.
This is Epic Fail. ! to ! to
I remembered the text of the group "brick"
Today is a bad day, everything falls out of hand.
Danny Boy here told me - fucking, smoke bamboo"...
Does anyone have a bamboo to smoke?
...and yes, this text I tried to grab with my hands in the gips...

If the work is paid little, then you should get at least pleasure from it.

security
Not further than today I went to the passport table to get an excerpt from the home book. I stood a short line, gave the employee a passport and said, “I just need an excerpt from the home book.” The girl smiles gently and asks, “Only?” I’m a little surprised, but I’m silent. She takes her passport, checks carefully, enters data into the computer, looks closely at the screen and suddenly... wildly screams: “PROTECTION!!! The protection!! I'm in a stupor...I think something is wrong with my passport? Or have I been searched? and a pause.
A guard comes out and says, “Well, what do you need?” The girl said, “Serga, close the window! It’s cold, it’s blowing.”
Finally... :-)

Dreaming of becoming a millionaire, one thinks about how to spend a million, and never about how to earn it.

Dima Bilan: “I was sent by God to make music”
Nikita Mikhalkov: "I have not sent anyone!"

Your equal
M is younger. four and a half years)
Write it normally. for half a year
M is four and a half. He wrote
Not the Russian.
M: You don’t catch up. Is it 19 years old that I understand? Four and a half years younger than me.
G: Write the number
m: *wall * 4.5 years
No need to send smiley, I don’t see them anyway. I smoked there.
M: It’s not me who smoked it, you can’t understand it. I write very intelligently.
I am 19 years old, four and a half years (4.5) younger than me.
How clearer
She is 23 and a half. 22 and a half.
She is 19 and a half. It's almost me 24. the age difference is 4.5 years old)
I could not write for 0.5 years. and 0.6
m: with 0.5 and 0.6, when it comes to 4.5 - four and a half)
Write in Russian I don’t understand you... your codes
M: We went short. I swallowed as soon as I could.
She is 20 and a half.
M: I wrote that she is 19 years old..............................
Yes, it is a fucking shit. You tired me of your jingle.
M: You burn... I was extremely intelligent and calmly speaking and explaining) I was already tired of explaining. Do you know where the 4.5 years came from?
by :. year of. I am angry with your points, I don’t understand and I don’t want to understand.
m: I am 24 years old - her 19.5 years = 4.5 years the age difference in us
I can’t do more, write numbers.

YYYY
When I was a child, I thought that the brake fluid was rough and poured under the wheels when it needed to brake.

X: Yes, sec, where is my hairy monster...
U: O_0
I am talking about the cat, fool!

Oxy (21:25:22 22/03/2011)
Mom bought some tea hanging, quite expensive, up to 50 grams.

Oxy (21:25:30 22/03/2011)
Inscription on packaging

Oxy (21:25:41 22/03/2011)
assorted

Oxy (21:26:10 22/03/2011)
apparently, the developers meant simply the word assortment with encrypted ti - tea

Oxy (21:26:44 22/03/2011)
In the end, there was something like a backpack (%)

LISANDER 19:28
You have a jigsaw brain.

The old lady (c) calls, she mistakes the number:
I am ALO
A to Z, Z to Z?
I am not, Misha.
C is gene?? to
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!! to
C is wrong. He puts the phone.

Leave the Japanese in peace. We are not as prepared for winter as the Japanese are for earthquakes.

Good when you are 4 years old.
You can take
Broken control and call my mom.