bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №77765
 21.02.2013
Why are you tired of lying down all day long?
YYY - I turn around

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77764
 21.02.2013
He attached a shell found at sea to his ear... A few seconds later they offered a cold beer and cooked corn.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №77763
 21.02.2013
Growing up is when you stop biting the baton you bought.
and no. Growing up is when the son began to bite the baton purchased.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №77762
 21.02.2013
The courier calls.
Please specify the address. There is no such "Cossacks Street" in Moscow.
I: What a street?
The Cossack Nuclear.
OK, the order number?
The courier says the number.
I open and look. I ask: What is the street?
Tagged with: "Courier"
I: Now read again and slowly.
Courier: Co-lo-des-ny... / an uncomfortable pause /... and bl.

[ + 33 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77761
 21.02.2013
I think, even 200 years ago, people said to each other, “Hey, the government has led the country to the shit... not what it was before... this country has not stayed long.”
and 1000 years ago

Anth 11:39
Even 10,000 years ago! "This leader will destroy the whole tribe, the fox."

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №77760
 21.02.2013
Talk to Dad about my husband:
Who is there with you? What can work off?
and :)

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №77759
 21.02.2013
Comments on “Anti-Tobacco Law” on Rambler.

Well, now we will live better, wealthier, corruption and oppression will disappear, the sewing in the entrances will cease, the factories will work and there will be a paradise in Russia.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №77758
 21.02.2013
From the hub, comment to the topic "how to become a system administrator, a guide for beginners"

F1RST: How to Become a Simple Man: A Guide to System Administrators, Volume 11, edition of Criminal Psychiatry – M: Prospect, 2011 and 1024.

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77757
 21.02.2013
Reply to Mouse

xxx: today bought this mouse, connected in five minutes, everything works, the design is very nice, not pleasant only that the wheel does not talk a lot, and so all the norms.

Connect the mouse for 5 minutes.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №77756
 21.02.2013
Faculty of Philology. A couple in Russian. The teacher has been reflecting indefinitely on the sound and pronunciation of different words in the language. Arriving at the word "cement", he stops, his gaze is filled with cosmic distancing.
Cement is yes. Cement is an important word. Here you will work on the construction, you will need to ask for more cement – and you will know how to ask for it correctly.
Ten pairs of female eyes look at him with a little hidden horror.
And we say, “McDonald’s. The McDonald’s.”

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77755
 21.02.2013
News title: "Governor of the White is ready to participate in the next elections of the head of the region"
I think that for the White Goths, then I understand the meaning of the word "ready" and I think that for the White. And then it turns out that it is still a name.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №77754
 21.02.2013
Dialogue between two friends. The first has lived in Russia, the second in the United States for 10 years.
1st- buy me the arbalet "mark, model" and passed the spare parts by mail.
Do you have an arboretum?
A zombie apocalypse?
So what is the problem with buying?
1 -Yes, he has a tension of more than 43 kg. Importation is officially prohibited.
A total of 43? Bass guitar up to 200 kg.
But you will not shoot from the guitar.
If the zombie apocalypse, then the guitar will be useful.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №77753
 21.02.2013
A: American people, looking at the Chelyabinsk clips, ask what the word “nikhuiyasebe” means. I explain that this is "meteorite" in Russian. Russian is astronomically rich.
B: They have not yet heard of the astronomical term "ahtyzhyobanytynahuy". He just hasn’t arrived yet.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №77752
 21.02.2013
From the announcement on Avito:

Apple iPad 4 Retina 16Gb Wi-Fi
The price is 12,000 rubles.

"The price is low. The party was removed from the customs, without disbursement. There are 13 available. Black and white flowers. ...
Payment at the meeting.
All checks are possible at the meeting.
Call after 22 hours. tk. Speaking at work is not comfortable.
Phone 8 926 666-94-82 Ask Oleg Kydalov"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №77751
 21.02.2013
Our proger has tested various WordPress plugins on the free hosting bcr.by. The sites were mostly filled with all kinds of huts like the Green Elephant. There were 5. Today he was called from bcr.by and asked - nahuya he plants elephants!!!!!!! to

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №77750
 21.02.2013
I am angry with my mouse.
XXX: You jump down and he jumps up.
Turn the mouse.
XXX does not work like this.
XXX and red in the eye

[ + 11 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77749
 21.02.2013
1: What kind of shit are you?
Yes, I work in a managerial position, I have money in the family, I close two not weak loans without problems, the apartment is super, the house is fine in a beautiful place, the hands are right where they should be inserted and the tools are eaten, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I’m not a fan, I do sports, and she says, “If I didn’t fuck so well, I would have left you for a long time.”! to

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №77748
 21.02.2013
Here is another story from the life of Maine Kun Varlak.

The Preamble
On the site besides him, another red cat, 6 cats and from 16 to 32 Maine Coon kittens, lives another cute creature in the 64-kilogram format, namely a fragile girl from Central Asia.

Fabula
Once in the summer, persons of non-Slavic appearance began to obsessively offer tracture tiles, tubes and other labyrinths... It was proposed obsessively, with arbitrary penetration behind the calice, lapping women by the hands, etc. While all this was happening to the neighbors, the dog was quietly lying down, only strangling the remnants of the ears and something about herself, such as "Ponahali".

And here is the historical moment, the calf opened up and the avant-garde in the number of three eagles broke into the territory, proclaiming the air with screams of "the most expensive tile is inexpensive for you, beautiful woman".

...neighbors then told the picture for a long time, when they flew out on a pair of Jara and Varlak for a meeting with the reef, the haw and the wild mew, and the "dear guests" politely disappeared with screams, where the "sheitan" was bluntly guessed, "demans", "fso braai" and "brother, don't uizja, mine wazmi".

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №77747
 21.02.2013
You have a wife, and I have a cat.
It’s easier with my wife.
And for the cat Nuno still parents to manage.
Buying a pot

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77746
 21.02.2013
What do you hurt, what do you hurt?
She: Aha, down of life (
He: What is it for?
She: Fuck you guess! Three letters
Q. What is it that grows?? to

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