bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №90505
 02.12.2013
The article 4 times finds the idea that the entry threshold for programmers is very low. Why is? And since it is not so high, why is there still a shortage of personnel?

Employers don’t need people who just crossed the threshold. They need those who know not only how to cross the threshold, but also to enter the room through a closed door, to climb into the chimney, along the way building a staircase of sublime materials, parallel to performing Schubert's valves.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №90504
 02.12.2013
I work in preaching. A couple of weeks ago, one of my students proved to fellow students that summer is due to the fact that the Earth, revolving around the Sun, rises into the orbit of Venus (i.e. Venus). It becomes a planet from the sun, becomes closer to it) and we are warmer. When he laughed at her, she was very angry. The bachelor must be obtained in a year and a half.
If you recognize yourself, no insults. This cannot not be shared.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №90503
 02.12.2013
As a child, I, like everyone else, collected candy fantasies. I had a very good collection. The value of the specimen was determined by beauty and rarity. But there appeared a cowboy, to whom a mother from a confectionery factory brought candy fantasies in rolls. At one point, the value of my “treasure” was rapidly approaching zero. This is the first time I have experienced hyperinflation.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №90502
 02.12.2013
The Smartphone Forum:
My glass itself broke not very bothering but already 9 cracks on it and becomes more and more with each fall.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №90501
 02.12.2013
The last few years have brought the security guards two shocking surprises in a row: hackers, it turns out, hack! The spies are spies! Who could have thought of that ten years ago?
YYY: Another surprise from the last one too. It turns out that the intelligence services are listening, and the insiders are merging. Shut up now.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №90500
 02.12.2013
She came to us in the accounting office of the chief, immediately after an economist, such as a young special, something she was taught there for 5 years, probably, and after all, she took exams.
The first working day, after a couple of hours "work" gives the vote:
Should we pay taxes to the state and not it to us?

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №90499
 02.12.2013
About the men:
She: Come, we need to go to the store.
I can’t, I’m sick, I’m sick. (About 10 minutes It is with a thermometer.
What is your temperature?
He: Not yet, but I’ll probably wait.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №90498
 02.12.2013
Artists, take the courage! Everyone is eagerly looking forward to the comic about ananas!)))

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №90497
 02.12.2013
by Alex:
I didn’t have a normal combo for two days.

by alisa_dorian
It sounds like "I have not had normal sex for 2 years")

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №90496
 02.12.2013
In the office.

Tomorrow, Katie, at what time will you be?
Yyy to breakfast? Maybe at 10 o’clock...
XXX: Okay, I am going to reflect. Catherine, at what time will you be there tomorrow?

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №90495
 02.12.2013
In our house a boy jumped out of the window.
xxh: wrote in a posthumous note that he does not want to live in the same country with Milonov, according to local news said that it is all the fault of anime...

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №90494
 02.12.2013
IUU (12:01) :
We went on Saturday to the Mushroom.
Do you know the burning of this story? Well, I probably don’t understand something about modern children’s art.
UJT (12:03)
A short narrative:
The spider dressed in a flea to give the flies boots with gold clamps, where he poured poison! To let the flies dissolve their legs when they wear these boots! But the good mosquito in time recognized the spider in the flea and gave him puzzles. Then the bee-maid came and brought honey to the flies. But the mosquito thought that it was again a dressed spider and for nothing wrapped the butt of the bee grandmother!!! For this reason, all the insects condemned him and driven him to the dam. At this point, the spider still hit the fly, and then there was a five-minute scene of hardly beating the fly with some stick, and she was exhausted all this time. Then the mosquito saved her, but flew, the fox, from the mud too long.) And since Lesya is well acquainted with the original of this work, she, gently speaking, was in the shower of this show. And I too. I bought a ticket for the 5th of January. I look forward to the show.
Thirteen (12:07)
Fuck, I have to put it somewhere.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №90493
 02.12.2013
xxx: I was once told in the accounting office: "what? We’ve already given you that paper, right? Oh, sorry, it is we, apparently, in the labor orgasm confused..."

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №90492
 02.12.2013
Tagged: Ubisoft

I now understand why they are so fooled.

xhh: to run their game, I have to run a steam, from steam to start the game, instead of the game, their luncher uplay is launched, which launches the game, which launches, then says that you need to download the DLC, it closes, the luncher pumps the dlc though fuck I bought the game through steam and what shit could not immediately download them at once, and twice in different places you need to enter the series of the game.

Buy a license, fucking.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №90491
 02.12.2013
The most fucking

If you are pursued by a black helicopter without identification signs

XXX: Speaking bad signs

xxx = = =

Especially if it is flying low.

YYY: Even for the rain

xxxx :D

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №90490
 02.12.2013
In the Japanese city of Saitama, a woman-passenger failed to belt into the gap between the composition and the platform

On July 2, at the Minami-Urava station in the Japanese city of Saitama, a woman-passenger crashed through the belt into the gap between the composition and the platform. About forty passengers pushed the car away from the platform and the woman was rescued without any damage.

One wagon of such a train weighs about 32 tons along with the wheels. The delay from the schedule in the movement of compositions on this line, which arose due to the incident, was no more than eight minutes.

According to the old good Japanese tradition, after the rescue operation, the woman apologized to all the passengers and employees of the station for the inconvenience brought.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №90489
 02.12.2013
What is most funny - in the afternoon, the locals are so cultural-intelligent, and the Russian language where you hear it - you will meet some.
In the night the opposite. The Lithuanian bull goes out, begins its breakdowns. And out Russian-speaking intellectuals, polite and cultural.)

>> is the night watch (Russian), and the day watch.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №90488
 02.12.2013
to this:

Some dualist published in Odnoklassniki his following "calculations":
Previously, the salary was 70 rubles, and the bread cost 20 kopecks, so today the salary should be 70 thousand, not 7 thousand, because the bread costs 20 rubles. If you agree, press the class!and "
I explain in detail:
20 kopecks - 70 rubles = 7000 kopecks,
20 rubles – 7 thousand rubles.

My comments to such a message with the indication of error were systematically deleted by the author, remained only praiseful "oh, you are right" and so on and so on. So it’s even bigger horror than you think.

[ + 32 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №90487
 02.12.2013
I enter the DNS - a consultant appears (k)
Hi, what can I serve?
I - Hi, dearest, be so kind, help me in choosing the memory operating for my computer
K - of course, strike, go to the windows. What memory do you have?
I - be so kind, I do not need a DDR 2, and memory in it, four gigabytes is desirable.
Q. I am very sad about not being able to help you. Such a component is not available.
I am sorry, I am sorry. Wouldn’t you look for a gigabyte for two?
K - here, please, operating memory, two gigabytes in it, Kingston overseas firm, and costs one and a half thousand rubles. Would you like to buy this wonderful item?
I - Of course, please take me to the box.
This is the moment, Lord.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №90486
 02.12.2013
A friend of mine wrote sadness. The sadness. What a Mexican word... Caballero in sorrow ate paella.

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