I am a dean at one of the Russian universities. I came to college, two students came to me, decided to joke about them:
I: Ladies and gentlemen, if you answer me three questions at once, I’ll give both a quote on any subject.
C: Give it up!
Q: In what year did World War II begin?
from:1939
In what year did the Great Patriotic War begin?
C: Silently RJut 1941
I: Write me a quick algorithm for converting all GIF files to PNG in Bourne Shell
These students take a leaflet, what they are advised to write, I think everything is okay, and they give me a leaflet in a minute...
C: for file name in image/*.jpg
by Do
if! file $filename gc grep -q "JPEG image data"
then continue
fi

if convert $filename ${filename%jpg}png
then echo "$filename -> ${filename%jpg}png"
else echo "$filename don't converted"
fi

Done

I: Well, I promised once... Which object to close
C: The philosophy

After that, he thought for a long time what kind of beast he taught them philosophy.

M0rgan: Even if at some point a woman is all right, then very quickly comes the moment when she begins to not be happy with the fact that she is all right.

The icebreaker Admiral Makarov is 134.85 meters long and has a displacement of 7.550 tons.
Missile cruiser Moscow - 11490 tons.
- Roman Abramovich Yacht Eclipse - length of 162,5 meters, displacement of 13000 tons.

Take the yacht, arm with rockets and send to fight with pirates.

I understood that for me the remarkable film “Through the Universe” reflected the entire system of life in Russia (not only military), with only three replicas:
Is there a reason not to serve in the army?
I am a gay transvestite of pacifist views with a tumor in the lungs.
You will go down if there is no flat foot.

I was on the bus today.
Conductor(k): Does anyone get out at the next stop?? to
Girl (D): Yes, I am going out
Q: Press the button
D: It is not pressed.
K: Because it doesn’t work.

You are a psychologist?
YYY: a little
Q: Do you have a diploma?
It is a piece))

Do you know I’m getting married?
YYY: Are you married?
xxx: yes
YYY: Then I know

Criminal case on the death of the family of Nicholas II is closed.

XXX: Fuck, they won’t put Lenin, so it will lie.

The wife walks around the room, sings, "I know the password, I see the landmark, and in the evening the brigadier fuck me."

I am "What is fucking?and "

Remember the simple rule - only TP call their boyfriend - MCH.

Science is a decompiler trying to bring God’s program to the source code.

News on site: "The officials will be taught to turn off the lights. 24 million rubles will be allocated for courses over two years. Officials trained in this way are expected to reduce electricity consumption by 15% over five years.
The first comment:
24 million to train officials to turn off the lights... a federal energy-saving campaign... I love you Russia!

xxx: The end of the shelf life of the yogurt means that the bifidobacteria have moved to the side of evil.

KVN 50, "Odessa gentlemen" they remembered... Ah, youth... Here is us, in the past, at the prince-to Kiev, the funny skymorohs at the fairs mixed so laughed. Remember, "child with hryvnia", "what will happen if you put a arrow in the eye", "grandfather on a green car"... Lie in all Kiev, you know.

Secret Materials 5x11 (1998)
Mulder (M), Scalley (C) and three friends (IT) investigate the death of a computer genius.

M may have killed him.
I found this disk in his computer.
IT – what is it?
C is dark.

When I got home, I turned on an emergency call (RNT). The video of the accident is coming. I was stressed in it by the words of the host:" while doctors were fighting for the life of the woman, she received serious injuries";

Oh yeah, yesterday
Q: What have you forgotten?
Wow, was it still?
I’ve gotten up, right?
Here I am a cattle.
HH: No, I didn’t stick at all.
Here I am a cattle.

and 129
Danny Yakovlev
23 December 2010 at 17:33
Posts Tagged ‘how was my day’"
I got stuck in the morning.
Managed to remove the valve from the heating system.
The result is a stream of boiling water in the ass. How I jumped onto the roof through the u-u-zenk outdoors, I don’t remember. He stumbled on top, through the smell of the boiling water - and on the rope...
I lost this dropdown. How – I do not know. Theoretically it is impossible. I have learned)
5 is I spent 1.5 hours looking for a sparkle with mates and a lighthouse.
6. because it became impossible to work - I went to the boss in full. Despite the dry clothes.
I bought a new drop-off. in 15 minutes. I was called and an old woman was found. Now I have two!
8. opened in the metro "chernovik" Lukyanenko. The first phrase: “There are days when things don’t go well.”The lady who stood next to me ran off the escalator from my hook.

I understood what superpowers were.They opened up when I carried a cup of tea at the computer and realized that in a moment I was sneezing. From the door to the comp ~ meter 4. I sneezed. The circle is on the table. No drop is poured. I do not remember how I did it. >_<

Mathematics for Women’s Forum:
I met a guy for 2 years, they loved each other.Delo went to the wedding, I liked him to my parents, all badly, but we never had sex. All just kisses and hugs...And I want sex, I haven’t had sex for 6 months.