bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №135281
 27.10.2016
The respected!
Explain, please, why a mother playing in Italy with a child in the sand is a dumb pitch? Just because she has a child? In this case, your mom is exactly the same. Because she plays with the child in the sandbox and photographs him? Do you know what else to do with a child, for example, a year old, at sea? If you think that you can and need to go on tours with him, looking at the sights, you are forced to be disappointed - if a mother with a one-year-old child prepares for the excursion, then your excursion will be covered with a copper basin, and then it will be twice TP. If you watch the baby for half an hour and the mother takes a picture of him, have you automatically concluded that they spend the time all 24 hours a day? Maybe before the birth of the child, she travelled around Italy, and not only, along and across, but now brought the child to the sea, so that he could burn, swim and clutches - he is supposed to do this by age, because it is only you who were born at once 16 years old with a higher education, and they are ordinary people. When you lie down on the beach, no one thinks about you – oh, fucking, TP, arrived without a child and lying on the beach instead of looking at the sights. And when you take pictures of yourself (yourself-something the whole young man is doing now) or friends - you are also not told that you are TP, came to shoot.
Some people have a direct urge to fool someone because their ideological considerations are different. Live calmly now.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №135280
 27.10.2016
In the morning brought two compasses for repair and suddenly burned a glimpse on my compass, pissing everything, I thought, but here the daughter (2 years old) decided to put a bay... a sleeve (capped) and we put it on, I was already on the computer, I, fuck the sleeve to sleep, smoked, put on...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №135279
 27.10.2016
Arr... we need a telepatic proctologist to extract TZ from the place of the customer he thinks!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №135278
 27.10.2016
Yes, with the current rate of growth of users on the Internet, any battle in six months is boldly not fearful again.

and.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №135277
 27.10.2016
I explain to my colleague how to get to my home:

There will be many turns, and at the end there will be an impasse.

A fellow breathing:

Like my life.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №135276
 27.10.2016
This is where the chatter about Childfrey begins.
I immediately realize that this topic is endless. So I urge you all to break away from each other! It is each person decides - to give birth to children, not to give birth to children, what fucking thing to climb to each other and try to understand and understand? A waste of time and nerves.
I don't understand when some stick to the Childfrey with the notes "children are good, children need to be born, give birth quickly, who will give you a glass of water in old age, you need to continue your family and so on, and I also don't understand when Childfrey stick to people with children "on the face of you these wealthy larvae, you will ruin your whole life, and so on.
You are. We have children, but we are perfectly friends with a family couple who do not want children, they are both over 40, they travel a lot, live exclusively for themselves, but this does not prevent us from being friends, gather together for holidays, they do not show any aggression to our children, on the contrary, they give gifts, play with them.
There are people with a certain philosophy, and that’s their right. But this, of course, has nothing to do with 12-year-old minors who want to raise children, and stupid teens who make collages about how a child burns in a fire, or how his hands are cut off. The latter - with deviations requiring the intervention of a psychiatrist.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №135275
 27.10.2016
Dieto recently issued an excellent classification on Borges.

Trying to feed a tiger with a bulka

Mom, do tigers eat pancakes?
Mother : No. They eat meat.
Q: What is unflavored?
Who will eat them in the woods?
C: I do not know. The man. Or a Chinese. Or a tourist.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №135274
 27.10.2016
I urge you all to break away from each other! It’s everyone’s choice – to have children, not to have children.

So is the salt! We don’t want anyone to decide without us. We want to decide for everyone and tell everyone!!! to

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №135273
 27.10.2016
xxx: I definitely can’t play GTA San Andreas, and it’s all too much to get there.
On the one hand, you feel like a little Hitler – because burning bandits with napalm is not only fun, but also racially beneficial to the genocide!
On the other hand... I never felt like a greater Jew than when I tried to pick up money from a corpse in the fire and burned myself.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №135272
 27.10.2016
Q: What legal state are you talking about?! to
XHHH: brother scattered with a bunch of minors
In the courtyard at night, they wept, beat bottles, mocked women.
He crushed one of his sleeves, and he crushed him from his 2.05 height.
The one was literally wet in the pants, the others ran away.
He didn’t even have to beat anyone, and now he’s serious about his business.
xxx: there are such misleading phrases as "threateningly looked"
xxxh: and " repeatedly threatened...Call the police!"
Mental injuries to a seventeen-year-old teenager... no words...

[ + 29 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135271
 27.10.2016
<shamir> How much will the cremation cost?
<Br.Cyril> The minimum set of ritual cremation services, including the cost of the panicle and urn, will cost €190.
<shamir> and You used to cremate for free.
<Br.Cyril> Sorry you are confusing. Maybe a bit cheaper, but not free.
<shamir> Yes no, exactly four hundred years ago.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №135270
 27.10.2016
Calculate how much you need to spend on a cat (and even cats) and how much on a child. Just not at least take, but so that the clothes are high quality, and the school is good, and travel at least once a year.

At least at the very least. I feed two cats with high-quality naturals for 600-700 rubles a month. Another 400 for a cheap filler. What kind of child can beined for 1000 a month? And what kind of child can be kept while on maternity leave, if his father, for example, dropped into the blue range? Children are not toys. Again, children are not toys. This event is very expensive in terms of money, time and mental strength, and does not guarantee a positive result in the long term. So before starting them, think: maybe a cat is enough? From a poorly educated cat society will suffer incomparably less damage than from a poorly educated person. by DIXI.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135269
 27.10.2016
Mikhail: I connected to the computer of a friend, standing in his office, by timvier, to update SPU_orb, so I did my job, happy I drink coffee. He calls and tells. In the office, the people from the ninth pasht, and at the beginning of the ninth comes a cleaner and washes everything thoroughly. The cleaner is the grandmother of God, with the technique not even "hello-what is it?".
She washes the floors and then the monitor begins to shine and the images themselves change.
In general, as it turned out, the grandmother with a scare heated the monitor swabrown...
Michael: This is how it is. I went out to update the remote, and eventually the monitor also sentenced.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135268
 27.10.2016
Today, sheeting an ancient sewing of orders from 1993 (on pergament!) at the request of the pension fund, found a wonderful thing: "In connection with repeated violations to translate a buffet in such a lottery". It is poetry!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №135267
 27.10.2016
Are all the villagers stupid? Or you principally can’t communicate with people, because in your fucking taiga there’s no one to communicate with, just shake and drink vodka? You, the defective Thai drug addict, what did the "hilly citizen" ask about? Did he ask you about the village? Did he ask you, old idiot, how many months you work and how much you rest? Fuck the two! You, Churban, were asked about the specialty! Do you know this word? Or do you do what the boss tells you to do? Why have you written so many words on your hands with dirty nails and not answered the question?

I, a chilly citizen, officially declare that I have nothing to do with this post, I do not support or approve it, and I consider the author of this post to be a ham and biddle.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №135266
 27.10.2016
U.S. Ministry of Justice: attempt to fix violations in elections is a violation in elections. A perfect democracy without witnesses

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №135265
 27.10.2016
Why haven’t you come from Siberia?
Who paid for the parents? Remember: everyone pays for himself, but in connection with the fact that you can't make money running in the diapers, you take a loan from the state, which you need to repay. Don’t believe, get acquainted with the system of education loans in the same U.S., where no one is taught for free.
The ambulance is doing well. All three of my grandmothers survived due to timely emergency calls and shunt operations.
Keep silent about disability. I had a friend who tried to refuse her. So it didn’t work out: they got a stroke and didn’t have to run anywhere.

Have you tried to go out?
100 km from Moscow. In the children's clinic in 7 areas - 3 pediatricians.
What a shunt, the simplest operations to do no one. Half of the therapists are deep retirees. From all the equipment only X-rays work, and for him as long as the turn reaches, it may not be necessary. Uzi is only a plate. In pharmacies, the most popular goods are bandages, systems for droplets and saline. To get a disability you need iron health to go through all these circles of hell. Truth some form quickly, when there is no more than three months to live.
I can write for a long time, but I don’t want to.)
P.S There are no people living in Siberia. To see your mythical treasures you need to tour the capital to buy?

[ + 27 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135264
 27.10.2016
We all have us, WWE. There are moments of mental weakness. I am like a decent person in the autumn, comfortably sick and started reading fantasy. About swords, magic, zombies and dragons.
The payment came immediately. Now Yandex.Direct and Google and all-all-all are pursuing me with the ads of experienced magicians – and that’s all, as you understand, the overwhelmed aunts with demonic makeup, and there’s no force to drive them out of our layer of reality into the outer darkness.
and divide me

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №135263
 27.10.2016
He worked in the MTS in the call center, worked in the night shift. Since there are very few calls at night, so if the same number calls twice overnight, this is noticeable. And here at night there is a call, the greeting is not played and here in the telephone (K is the client, C is my friend):

Is it the MTS company?

Stupid situation, discrediting the company cannot be broadcasted, but answering "No" is also not suitable.

(C) Sorry your dialogue is not constructive, I am forced to finish the dialogue.

Time passes and a call comes from the same number again.

Is it the MTS company?

(C) Sorry your dialogue is not constructive, I am forced to finish the dialogue.

And so a few more times. Eventually, the same subscriber falls out again, I look forward to repeating the dialogue:

Is it the MTS company?

- (C) O_o, Yes, this is the company MTS, my name is Maxim, how can I help you?

P*Doras, you are Maxim and your company is Y*Anna! ! to ! to I put a phone*

And he did not call again that night. Thanks to you! ))

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №135262
 27.10.2016
All this mess with the evil clowns-killers must end! Cruel night dresses sooner or later will lead to the fact that every guy in the clown suit will meet someone who will not be afraid of him and escape, but will defend themselves. And it doesn’t matter what: a knife, a stick, a pistol, in this situation it will be perceived as self-defense.

In the police records of the Berlin police appeared information that in the dark hours of the day, a 16-year-old boy in a clown costume with a cuvalda wanted to scare his acquaintances teenagers. One of them, a 14-year-old boy, took a folding knife out of his pocket and put the clown in his chest. Then he pulled off the falling and bleeding mask and found underneath it the face of his acquaintance. After that, the children themselves called 911 and provided first aid to the injured before the arrival of the ambulance.

Next is the most interesting!

The clown was taken to the hospital and there was arrested - a guard was placed at the chamber. The 16-year-old is accused of attacking teenagers. The action of the small man with a knife was recognized as self-defense. Once the clown recovers, he will be tried.



Great dress, good luck to you!

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