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[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126598
 09.04.2016
When a collector girl calls me, I just tell her the truth that I am an adult, bearded, forty-year-old, eyebrowsy man with obesity and a beer bub. And then politely and very obsessively I attempt to get to know her. It is a pity that I have not met any of them yet. The cable why are they throwing away (men, by the way, also, tell me why???) is

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №126597
 09.04.2016
Not leaving the house:

A shit in an empty place! Those who are disturbed will always find something to do. to the children in front of parents, baskets, large sports bags or even better grandmothers with bags on wheels, which take up to 3 steps at a time.

I don’t count how many steps anyone takes, I myself never stand up to anyone, but sometimes protection from the fool does not save from those who are able to think only of themselves.
Yesterday, the grandmother standing in front of me with a bowl on the wheels, stepping from the escalator, suddenly froze in place and started rushing with her bowl to do, because of this I just had nowhere to go down from the escalator, and I was almost knocked down by the big aunt who stood behind, she also had nowhere to go down because of me and my grandmother, and the escalator, unfortunately, was over.
There were still people standing up and down, a lot of people. And if my grandmother had not finally left, and my aunt had not picked me up under the stomach and pressed me like a cat, it would be hard to say how it would end.


[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №126596
 09.04.2016
You laugh in vain.

UsaIsAnAsshole: I know a nineteen-year-old guy who didn’t know the word “assenization” and suggested that it was a complex technical or scientific term.
UsIsAnAsshole: Aha. Perspective Assenizator Engineering or High Energy Assenization Research Institute.

High-energy assenization is a wildly complex and expensive industry. It is especially necessary to drive with such a shit as a neutron - it is secondary. There was a whole cycle of articles on how radioactive shit is calmed.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №126595
 09.04.2016
I’ve always naively thought it’s me deciding when on the week of my floor. Today I realized that this is most often decided by my morning cuddling cat, less often my creative child.

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126594
 09.04.2016
A good manager, for the fact that I was crazy in the classroom, threatened that I would dream for the rest of my life, and scare with dictates... 30 years have passed, I have long since recovered, maybe enough? No, not, but I have dreams.

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126593
 09.04.2016
P.S I’ve met a lot of stories about how some girls don’t like how other ladies wander around the dressing room naked. Not a story from a guy. But believe me, most of us melt from the closet to the shower and back completely without clothes. And no one pays attention to it.

Simply for the sake of historical justice: we don’t like the fact that other ladies dive into the closet naked. It’s understandable, but it’s still a dressing room, nobody’s cuddling in the sweaters.
We are haunted by dumb phytonaches who swim out of the shower and like the queens start to wander around the dressing room, not considering it necessary to dress. Not from the closet to the closet. They will dry their hair in front of the mirror, shave their nails, trample with their girlfriends, dig in a bag, get up with cancer, talk on the phone. All this is naked. Not only do they foolishly interfere, discussing in the whole voice their cats and puppies, not only do they occupy the fans for hours, do not allow them to the mirrors, lay down the scissors on all the benches. We also need to shock the breasts, and demonstrate the intersection. There is no concern about it, it is just angry.

I have never been in the men's dressing room, but something I doubt that there are such men who get out of the shower sitting naked back on the bench and, for example, for half an hour stick to the phone, scratching the hairy muddy. I think they still dress first and are naked for no more than ten minutes and only if necessary. Therefore, there are no stories of borrowed guys. If I am wrong, correct it.

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №126592
 09.04.2016
Taken from Screenwriter.ru By the shattered gaze of the attendees, Makar understands that there has been a hundred percent shit.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №126591
 09.04.2016
Comments on the article on GT:

StrangerInRed: Strange, but why is it not on the hub?
5erG0: This is my first post. I have not mastered here yet. I can't understand the difference in directions - hubr, gick, megamozg
IronHead: The difference is about this:
Habr: Quick algorithm for image recognition on 8-bit microcontroller by table method
Hicks: Look, I twisted the display to the Arduino!
How to Sell Chinese Arduins or the Realities of the Overloaded Sales Market

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №126590
 09.04.2016
Reception at the veterinarian:

Doctor: And what is his name? (Referring to the big cat in the hands of the owner)
The owner is Marcus. My mother called him Barry.
Doctor: And what name is he responding to?
Hostess: In my principle, he does not respond to anything.

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №126589
 09.04.2016
The forum chemicals.ru, the topic of "electrolysis of the house":
xxx:"Electrolysis at home". It is okay to electrolysis of cooking salt, etc., but the house is poorly conducting electric current)))
WOW: Depending on what tension to give... until the break. I’m just afraid to imagine what reaction products will be.
Q: What are the reaction products? On the anode - House with a plus, on the cathode - House with a minus. When recombined with dimerization, the House-2.

[ + 15 - ] Comment quote №126588
 09.04.2016
Yandex is not happy with the fame of Google as a project cemetery, and they also decided to shut down everything good and leave everything bad. Soon Yandex will shut down mail and search and focus on its main product: Yandex bar with uninstall protection.
How will they then get it?
XH: They won’t pair it up, they’ll preinstall it on new computers, with firmware in the UEFI's bios and automatic installation through the OEM's binary (to survive the reinstall).

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №126587
 09.04.2016
The trade deformation. I remember working in the export department of a large hoax factory. We sold the tubes. I translated our Soviet guests into English for the Chinese so that they could do the same for our guests. One big contract for a lot of money dragged us into a long job hole without weekends. I watched the movie while that. The film was "House of wax figures". The employee asks how I feel about the movie, I say the movie fucking, but one plus is that Peris Hilton is being murdered. It is wrapped in a tube. The employee asked "which tube?". I answered without blinking the eye with the "unsewed austenitic tenth". Then pause and roast.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №126586
 09.04.2016
xxx: Masha, your design version for their website is very good! But I don’t think he’s very good for his orientation. Well, imagine - some op of the world, on a desert road riding a gang of bikers. They are entering a road trip. They stop. The eldest man comes down from his iron horse, fixes the eggs, opens the door with his feet, enters and says, “TWO WORKSHIPS!”

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №126585
 09.04.2016
“The Norwegian politician has admitted that he feels guilty that the black man who raped him from Somalia is being deported to his homeland.”
Commentary :
“Let him, as a Decabrist, share all difficulties and burdens.”

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №126584
 09.04.2016
Where does the entire fauna of the carbon forest come from?
YYY: Printed in the coal. and ;)
zzz: This is a selfie of the carbon period, to live in such a way that in hundreds of millions of years, the descendants of...

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №126583
 09.04.2016
A man remembers his mother’s deceased girlfriend:

She was an interesting woman. No, not in the sense of "for the whole head", in the good sense!

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №126582
 09.04.2016
xxx: in almost all the songs of Kippeloff there are moments where the hell you will understand that he sings there)

YYY: and you painted your penis in black.

[ + 28 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126581
 09.04.2016
Years will pass and everyone will forget who Messi is, and our players will remain in anecdotes forever.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №126580
 09.04.2016
At the subway crossing, he noticed a subtle beauty with a huge suitcase and eyes full of horror: she looked at the stairs going up. In Stalin's time, the transition between the radial and the ring was richly decorated, but the death of the disabled. Not that there is no escalator, but also a guardian. I offered help, pulled the suitcase up and rolled it further, explaining that there was another staircase from the other end.
I know! - the girl smiled when I finally finished breaking up in gratitude - I caught the nerve at this transition to student years!
...??? to
She was dumb and couldn’t get to know. I looked at myself in the mirror and burned - such beauty disappears! My friend recommended the method. I found my husband on this transition in three hours and I still do not regret it. And the method is that you approach the staircase with a healthy suitcase and look at it more regretfully. Who will help first? The guy I liked. And while we go on the move, you’ll talk and see if he likes you. Well, physical condition is visible, I loaded thirty barrels of pounds in this suitcase. Of course, almost everyone is married or not in my taste. Then sit on the bench for half a minute, and back on the transition. There were also many hunters to drop the suitcase. During those three hours, I had twenty appointments, exchanged phones. For the first time I felt like a star. Even a sex bomb. Many went to drive home. And I referred to a rough dad who allegedly was waiting at the exit of my station. It helped magically. And then I met my future husband, here on this ladder. He expressed a keen desire to meet his father. So he went with me to my station. He stumbled at the lecture. And my friend, the author of the whole plan, had foreseen it. I demanded in advance to change her name in my socket to "Papa". We get out of the subway, Dad, of course, no, I call a friend, she answers by bass, that they called for an urgent meeting, get there yourself. You would see my husband’s pleasant face. And now, I actually got there, with the same suitcase. Thank you and goodbye!

Nippon was long. But the entire conversation lasts just in this transition is a couple of minutes. This is a really effective method of dating :)

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №126579
 09.04.2016
Adult life is when “March Home!” Not my mother, but my wife.

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