I love American superhero series. Aliens destroy cities, villains kill people and prepare to destroy the galaxy, someone has moved there from the past/future/other universe and wants to enslave everyone too. And the main characters are concerned with only one question: how to trust a grandmother / man if he / she did not tell you that 3 years ago I forgot to raise the toilet cover.

13.12.17 by
Today in the Saratov Regional Duma the Chairman of the Regional Committee on Tourism V.B. “Most of the tourist routes we create are losing their popularity because it is difficult to get there.”
She gave an example - you can only get to the mill in Petersburg with your own cars. Similarly - only on their cars - you can get to the place of Gagarin's landing.
"And how did Gagarin get there?, thought the deputy A.A., and somehow he got there".
Members have thought too.

You mean, is it harder for you to survive in your area than for Bear Grills in extreme wildlife?
yyy: It’s like Bear Grills had to survive among other Bear Grills.

Because the leopard is smart and understands that if the first jump is not fatal for the Aikidochnik, then the Aikidochnik will most likely not give a second chance.

From this statement it is immediately apparent that the respected author has never dealt with an angry domestic cat.

About the Sister

"Thank you, mother-in-law, who, having carefully studied the baby, broke through her teeth, that yes, this is their breed, a copy of her sons in childhood, even the fingers on her legs are so long, it comes out not rattled.

My husband and I could not have children for a long time. The mother-in-law, in secret from her husband, advised her to go for a walk. We only laughed at him (I told him of course).
Finally, the long-awaited event happened, the baby was born, but we didn’t laugh. The mother-in-law brought her husband to talk that the child was not his, not at all, advised to leave the family. I was not close to my grandson. Communication stopped (on the initiative of the husband), began to chatter among common acquaintances.
The irony is that the son is a copy of the father and very similar to the mother-in-law, but she does not seem to know about it.

The following events take place in every Russian family before the New Year:
The wife tells her husband to buy a New Year’s garland.
- the husband claims that the old, last year's will agree;
- get old, checked, does not work;
The husband claims that for a real man to repair them is a matter of five minutes.
Repairs will last all day;
With the screams of "Chinese fucking", guirlandes fly to the garbage.
The man goes to the market and buys the same shit from the Chinese.

Vasya: After the scandals that await me in the absence of a response to my wife’s messages in a well-known messenger, I would like to see new features in it: "She read that you read her message in hh:MM and is waiting for your response" and "She read that you read that she knows that you didn’t answer and still don’t answer and at home you are already waiting for a scandal". It would be very early to write it out.

the_stranger: The birthday was fun, especially delighted the animator. The girl in Elsa's costume from "Cold Heart" pumped the soap foam with some combustible gas, after which she took the foam into her hands and let the children tick in it with a lighter. As a result, the foam exploded with a huge fireball right in the girl’s hands. The kids were having fun, and the following phrase revolved in my head.
the_stranger: On their birthday, the children enthusiastically burned the witch and had fun watching it burn.

Ww: A cat bathing hat?
Fiona is AGA. Look at the price and the other products.
WW: For 25 dollars? The American Dollars?
Fiona: Just
Ww: For $25 you can sell aqualangs for cats. In order not to freeze. I put an aqualance on him and threw it into the laundry.

Any man who has visited the nursery will confirm you: babies appear to be all the same.
How a mother distinguishes her child, no man understands.

It does not differ. With the same view as a man. They are really all similar and we do not have a tenth sense for differentiating babies.

here here :

In the end, make a spoon that will count how many calories you have eaten. It will never end (

No-no-no, it is better to let her turn out of her hands and beat on her forehead when she overturns. So much more reliable.

Forums of Microsoft:

xxx: Lack of drivers in the list of devices, hardware id: ptun0901
What is this driver?

Evgeny Moryakov : This is the driver TAP-Windows Virtual Network Driver, in my case this device appeared after using the program KMS to activate the program, on this device driver as I understood to put not real because it virtually connects the program and activates some software, a lot read about it and came to the simple and briefly just removed this device driver for it not to put.

Moderators of the forum : Tell us in more detail, what "program" did you activate KMS? Which OS is installed on your device? How did you acquire it? Tell me, don’t be ashamed.

He writes a letter to Santa. A maid rests next to the chair.
Do you want to write a letter to Santa?
Fatherhood: No
Son : Why?? to
I think I don’t need anything.
You don’t need a new boot? (Our grandmother has a caterpillar)
A lump, maybe I need it.
The next day, they found a letter written by a caring grandson.
Dear Father Christmas. My name is 60 years old. Give me a gift for the New Year"

The main difference between knowledge and wisdom is that wisdom is never useless.

Seven-year-old daughter yesterday first watched "Irony of Fate" and calmly concluded that it is a good movie about unpleasant people. Only Hippolyte is normal.

A guy and a girl kissing on the couch.
She is:
Do you want to put on music for sex?
Go to!
Standing up and engaging Mendelssohn’s March.

Why don’t you follow my instructions? Am I your boss or your dog?
Both one and the other.

My cat is almost 14 years old.
Did you photograph him?
Why Why?
So he gets a passport.

XX: You did so wisely that you didn’t go to visit them. Oh my God, they are somewhat wicked. They say, say, try these "sandwiches with tears", they chew, they chew. In appearance, just bread with pasta, and under the pasta a thick layer of mustard.
YYYY : YYYYYY That was my recipe. xd

My friend works at Oracle, iron support. The client has a seat from one of the stands. At 2 a.m., the temperature steadily rises, then the food is cut off, the hellish overconsumption begins on the interruptor, after 40 minutes everything returns to normal. Change everything you can and can’t. did not help. The client cries and mosquitoes, the management is nervous. Calls for 30 people from a bunch of units. In the end, one girl wondered why it always happens exactly at two. Added access to the card. At 2 o'clock in the morning, the grandfather's cleaner goes to the machine room. Grandpa is called on the carpet, tortured what he is doing there. Grandfather tells him how he walks with the vacuum cleaner, nothing suspicious. The camera was put. At 2 in the morning again. Raise the recording.

Daddy comes into the room, hanging the coat (!) Standing on the back (!), pulls out two wires from the strip, a vacuum cleaner is plugged into one socket (!In the other cup (!Drive the vacuum cleaner for half an hour and drink tea for 10 minutes. He then pulls the wires back and leaves. Everything was explained.

During the process, it turned out that the grandfather was of a very respectable age, and dusting here since the time when there was a paper archive of the department in the room. From his point of view that some cabinets, that others - no difference.