Our people will be sick as long as doctors are paid for being sick.

This story, about our younger brothers, happened a few years ago.

It started with the fact that the aunt, who worked in the JEC all her life (now also) saw a mouse, when she in fear stumbled around the courtyard with a piece of somewhere picked carrot, and then rushed into the basement window of our house.
The impressive woman was very upset and soon, on her initiative, the workers came and all the roofs in the basement windows under the first floor were sourly cooked.

It was in December, and the same day suddenly hit strong frosts.
The courtyard cats were heated in the basement, and those who went out to the city for food returned and found a welded entrance. They wandered through the courtyard and wondered – why did they do so?

And here, I go out of the entrance, and I see a complaining cuddling cat of a familiar color.
The local cat pulled their kittens out to play in the yard and apparently didn’t have time to bring them back to the basement. He climbed to the staircase, it was cold, his mom cried and cried.

The thought of the cats, who probably remained in the basement, did not happen. Their mother is probably now running around the house, trying to climb to them somehow, or at all in the basement locked up... well, first all the mice will be eaten, and then?

I then called my handcuffed friend and said:
The cows in the basement were cooked, and I have a familiar cat there. Let’s open up, right?
Is the cat familiar? You are giving. Your job is to do without a scandal.
- Everything will be okay, we will get the cat and cook later, and I will have half a liter.

And I think - it is not difficult to cook, but the frosts hit where they are now.

But they started solving tasks as they arrived. While we pulled out the iron sheet, a cat was found. She went unnoticed, sat down and watched the situation.
As soon as they opened the window, she immediately jumped into the basement for her children.

A young man gathered in the courtyard and discussed what was happening.
They remembered that the homeless cats were on the frost and immediately told their parents about it. The animals are frozen, the animals are frozen.
Everything went on by itself. The initiative group of tenants demanded to explain why they blocked the ventilation provided by the GOST.
The decision was cancelled, and cats and cats were able to survive that frosty winter.

Probably this is the same case when everyone was delighted - and children, and cats, and mice.

Paying a fine to the GIBDD, the terminal refused to accept a mint bill, so that a human and good man would never come.

She worked in her youth for a year in a Moscow preschool institution, during this time she saw a bunch of inadequate parents, nurses, and so on.

So here’s the story of one papule who brought his six-year-old every day at 7: 00 and scored at 19: 00.

The evening. We return from the walk at 18:20, we are going to eat dinner. The kids are tired and want to go home. For dinner they bring potts with pasta and meat. In the door appears a papule (code name Filex).

The dialogue (F-file, I am):

Q: I came early today.

I: Good night, you can take my son.

Q: You can take dinner with us, we’re in a hurry.

I: Emm, well, we don’t have food to take, let the child eat quickly and you go.

F: We really have no time, bring us with you, we pay millions of rubles for our children not to starve.

I have already surrendered.

I: We don’t have containers where you can collect them?

Here, the papule takes a file from the bag and stretches it out to me.

F: Please come here, hurry, we’re in a hurry.

While the assistant of the educator inconveniently folded the pasta with meat in a file, the phrase heard behind the door:

F: and pour out the sludge, or the son says he is not watered.

Picture: a happy dad, holding a file with the flowing meat, plants his son in a steep march and leaves at sunset.

Patience to you teachers!

I don’t know if I wrote about it here or not. I have lived for 24 years in the glorious city of Rybinsk. A few days ago, our officials broke the records of alternative talent. And the thing is this: our brave servants of the people calculated that the cost of travel in the city transport should be increased, but not how, but by 85 kopecks. The cost of travel in the trolley bus from October 5 will be 18 rubles 85 kopecks. Isn’t it beautiful. What comfort for the conductor, what convenience for those who pay for the trip, and the funniest thing is that the coins, nominally 5 and 1 penny, ceased to be issued 5 years ago) And whether it should be handed over at all. I don’t know why I am writing this here. To grieve or to cry.

When you hear the word "masturbation", it is always red like cancer.

When I was 12, I thought it was, fucking, monthly.

One day in the class, my stomach was squeezed and I ran to the school doctor.

The doctor asked, “Did you eat something like this yesterday/today?”

I answer, “No, but, you know, I’m on masturbation for the second day, maybe that’s why?”

I will remember her eyes for a long time.

I was 15. You can go to the river with friends or to the cinema or elsewhere, but I decided firmly that it was time for me to make money on my houses. I am at home the oldest after my dad, of men... I generally told my parents, and I started to think where and who I needed such a responsible. But the solution came by itself: our neighbor, with whom we communicate well, learned from my mother that I was looking for a job. And a miracle! He urgently needed a promoter. The word is what, as soon as he said it to me and even promised 100r/hour, I agreed. And I started working: I distributed advertising leaflets for 5 hours a day without a break. Summer, the heat was walking in the usual shale, and the legs at the end of the day, but it was worth it) 500p a day! This is a whole fortune!! One day, a man approaches me and says:

Will I pay you $150 per hour?

And let it! What to do that?

- Also leaflets, only glue them at the entrances

Let me think!

First a trial period. You will have a week to disclose, photograph, report and, of course, free!

Faith in people has been lost. He saw that I was 15, and decided to throw the boy on the grandmother. But I wasn’t down, so I sent him on a long walk. He saved my faith in the people of the neighbor, because he did not need any promoter. I just found out this year, by chance. Why him this? He said he just wanted to help me, others could give up. I did not regret the 15,000 that I paid for my honest work. I got something more than just money, I understood the value of that money and again believed in People.

Thank you Uncle Serena.

Pre-pensioners will now be fired six years before retirement.

Peter in the 90s

It was too late. We sat in the room. A lamp burned on the bedside, my mother laid out the pastion on the computer, I told about the events at school. Suddenly in the darkness of the corridor appeared bright lights - orange, yellow, white.

“Look, how beautiful it is, Mom,” I said and pointed my hand to the lights in the hallway.

Mom took her eyes off the computer screen, immediately jumped up and ran out into the hallway. On the floor at the entrance door, a flame burned brightly, flame tongues licked the door and climbed to the jackets on the hanging and shoes at the wall. Mother stumbled, went into the bathroom, jumped out of there with wet clothes in her hands and threw him into the fireplace.

She tried to call the neighbors, even the best friend of Aunt Tane from the third floor... But no one risked to get out of the apartment and see what was going on outside our door, in the entrance. Firefighters arrived and shut the door.

It turned out that the door was filled with gasoline and poured gasoline under the door. Then they burned. Dermatin covering of the door burned easily. The ceiling and walls on the floor were in black divides. Probably a week later, my mother took me and my brother and went to Moscow with their parents. Dad stayed in Peter to deal with the requests of the racketers.

In Moscow, we were hardly attracted to school, also in English, near home. The English school was different. They came here not to study, came here in leather jackets and to measure the cars of their parents. I didn’t have a leather jacket, I didn’t have much. There were brains. A couple of people bought such merits and I got friends. Moscow, in general speaking, seemed unfriendly to me, and the school was strange. On the controls, you could use textbooks, teachers even suggested the number of the page... it was fashionable to upload rights and argue about the ratings, with lessons they helped each other for money. And there was also a drawing that we did not have at school. I still remember how I fought over the drawing of the hook until my grandfather explained that it was possible to divide the circle into six parts by putting a circle on it with six rays.

And then I won some math Olympiad, by chance, it seems I was the only one in the class to put a module when calculating the square root. In general, we just did this at the school in Peter already, and the Moscow program lagged behind us. I was given a note and pencil.

The most interesting thing happened after the Olympics - the winners from different schools were invited to participate in the selection entrance tours to the mat. school. But it was a completely different school - normal, filled up with the same botanists as me, without parental jeeps and leather jackets. To say that I wanted to go there is to say nothing at all. I wandered and prayed all the selection tours, and on each tour we became noticeably less.

On the board were written logical tasks, on the table was a sheet and a pencil... after experimenting on paper, you could raise your hand and explain the solution of the task to one of the teachers in the class, not necessarily to the end, and the answer was not important. Some answers were counted, some not. We could not prepare, but we could pray. And I prayed.

My mother didn’t know why she took me to the exam. The task on the board she did not understand, her child was not a genius. But it was she who pushed me at the end. According to the results of the tours, several people were selected, who had to be asked again at the interview. And here, when the question was decided will take this white-brush or "this guy," my mom spoke to me: "Speak English, talk about your foolish football, about playing guitar. You wanted here. Interest the people!”

Oh, what a charm, she’s playing football! We have a female football team!

I was taken.

New Legal Services:
Assistance in dismissal of employee of pre-retirement age.

I will call you one day about the workplace. I asked if the salary was delayed. Are you looking for a job or just want to get a salary? ! to He hanged the phone.



Later I learned that in this shark office for two or three months the money is held.

We have few parking spaces in the yard, so we often block the cars and leave the phone number under the front glass. I go out this morning, my car is locked. I call the phone number and the girl takes the phone. My phone is not my car, but my husband’s. He gives me his number. I call, he goes out, resets his car, I leave. But...

In the afternoon, a morning girl calls and asks at what address the man’s car was. I am talking. After a second’s silence, she said: “Happy!

Sorry man, if anything.

Poverty in Russia is dying out, so it has gone down.

Have you seen your husband’s eyes at least once when he sucked? No is! And I sucked at the cousin for the New Year, and then my husband went to the bathroom! So what? He had such eyes!
In 2008, they decided to go to the New Year in Lagos-Naki in a hotel, a place of course beautiful, the air and atmosphere far from civilization. On January 1, the comrade convinced me and my spouses to do a heroic act and go on a tour to one of the caves. I wanted to stay upstairs and drink a glint wine, but my wife insisted on the tour.
I have to say that the descent was by a metal staircase and the transition deep into the cave by bridges that crushed and bended, and since I did not sleep and still got sick from the water, I like a zombie slowly moved in the crowd in the darkness of the cave and hardly listened to the tour guide. I was not alone, there was still a brother in a chain with a thick finger, with a barbecue with a piercings and a dim sight. Well, in short, a very specific pashan, who came to a huge jeep of the type of Tahoe, and who also hardly gave in to the conjury of the spouse and agreed to a tour instead of a glintwein.
Five minutes later, in order to warm my frozen fingers, I wrapped my wife and pushed her arms under the coat and began to wrap my chest and rub my cheek on her hair. When asked that she was accidentally not cold without a swimsuit under her sweater, she shrugged her head and whispered in response. The radar began to work, she felt that she was holding something in the pop, began to rub and murmur. I quietly said to my ear that it would not depart from me, or everyone would see my radar in a combat position.) She whispered that everything was okay! So we went out to the central square where there was a lot of light, I stumbled and suddenly saw that from the opposite square looking at me with the blinking look of the spouse in the same coat as the lady I embraced!
With the scream of Yopt... This is not my wife! I pulled my hands out of my coat and jumped away.
What has not been communicated to the people. Everyone except me and the girl. What to roast? Imagine a painting with oil – She’s all dotted by embarrassment, and I’m with a standing hero and frightened eyes! From the shock he did not fall, and I tried for ten seconds with shaking hands to put him in one of the jeans pants, as the short jacket did not cover anything.
Reaction of participants:
Father of this lady:
It is stupid! It was necessary as soon as he began to embrace, turn to the exit and drag him into his daddy's car!
The lady (excuses me):
Dad, I was thinking about taking him by the hand!
A scream from the crowd:
I had to catch the shit!
The Canadian pashan:
The Brother! It is beautiful! You made me feel good for the whole day! Drink at the top.
The Wife:
A good year has begun!
At the top, a particular pashan dragged me to the bar with a shale and glintwein, where we had to fix our health for another hour.
And my wife has a smart woman...understood and forgiven...)))

Dear President Vladimir Vladimirovich! The inhabitants of Primorye, Khabarovsk region and Vladimir region are interested in whether those who voted against United Russia will be attracted by the article "Extremism"?? to

It was in Minsk. year of 2006. We worked on one object. As usual, the people with the boron on the saucer. Who is from where. My husband and I only knew each other. There is a company of four villagers. Six people are unfamiliar. We took the room as a home. We work. After two weeks, things start badly. Denzels as by the maneuver of evil will themselves disappear from the pockets of clean clothes. In different quantities, but every day. Everyone matters who for whom. But the disaster continues. Stir things like a dust. It is uncomfortable to carry. It can be forgotten or missed accidentally. After a week such a hernia already reaches a frank bite. My husband and I wanted to set up a seat. As always, the case helps. I brought color Xerox to the office. Only a misfortune. Delivery to the door and in the office onli ladies. We, as decent, helped get in for what was included in the gentlemen's league. And here I stumbled. The next day I asked for $20. Of course, ladies tortured me with all sorts of punishments, but my intelligent appearance reassured them.



Tomorrow the boat was abandoned. It was in the wallet, but the corner was visible. In the evening, the bill was extended. Who doesn't understand and the comrade said that I was a bad man and a bad man if I didn't look. But I knew what I was doing. The exchange was on every step. But the grandmothers were checked everywhere.



No one came in the morning... And at lunch the mints came. He told me what he borrowed from me. I naturally denied the origin. There, of course, rose up and cried out from the others. Everyone immediately wept who rats... When the mints left, I explained how it was. I only said that this note was found... In the end, the devil who was wearing our pockets received a conditional period, and in the household it became quiet...

At the end of the fifth course of the institute, the teacher in two sentences summed up all our studies in one phrase: “After graduation you are not needed by anyone, so agree to any proposals! »



This phrase settled very deeply into my brain, and after receiving my diploma, I set out to look for the perfect job. We did not know about headhunters and super pockets at the court in 2007. Therefore, the algorithm was as follows: 1) You go around the city 2) You find a building in the name of which is the word "energy" 3) You find the human resources department 4) You go through an interview 5) You realize that you are not needed here 6) go to the first point.



The problem, of course, is the lack of experience, skills and practice in the workplace. Engineers are only on paper. During the interviews I was unable to answer basic work questions.

After a week of such wanderings, one staff member gave the phone number of a company director from a neighboring city, who allegedly needed students, but it is not certain. This is my 100% chance! We called and agreed to a meeting. has arrived.



The director is not there. I call him. He apologized and said that the interview would be conducted by his deputy.



The Deputy arrives. This guy is an energy worker. With a powerful voice and constructive humor. They greeted. He looked at me. I asked a couple of questions, such as how I reached them, who my parents have, whether I am engaged in sports. I asked anything but not about work. Then he calls the director and they have the following dialogue (I hear the director’s answers):

ZAM: Sanych, here my student is sitting, I think to design it!

Are you confident? What kind of guy?

Yes, normal and clean! Such an intellectual

What is his height?

Above me, it is 180.

Okay okay, then make up.

I sit in the soup.



The deputy pointed me to the door where the human resources department was sitting, indicating that I could register. I arrive in a slight shock, because I was not even asked about the assessments! “This is a document for them,” he went back to the staff department when he was trying to hand him his diploma.

Later it turned out, the director is a high-healthy man, who values in people steadfastness and believes that the engineer should be high. This makes it easier for engineers to communicate with employees.



In the end, I remember this place of work as my universities. And most importantly, I needed the place. I am very grateful to those people and to the team for their lessons. There were many of these lessons. Everyone is interesting in their own way.

If they ask you what your mood is, they want to ruin you.

Former President Theodore Roosevelt in 1912 decided to return to rule the country again, as he was dissatisfied with his successor William Howard Taft.
During the campaign, Roosevelt decided to distribute 3 million brochures with his speech "Confession" and his photo on the cover.

Picture by Theodore Roosevelt. At the bottom of the image is the inscription "copyright 1910 by moffett studio chicago".
When the edition was already printed, Roosevelt's campaign leader discovered the record. And I understood a catastrophic mistake – no permission from the copyright holder was obtained for the use of the photo.
The copyright law allowed a photographer to demand $1 for each copy of the photograph. And in 1912, the loss of $3 million is equivalent to the loss of more than $60 million now. That price the staff could not afford to pay. And re-printing brochures cost not only money, but also time.
Roosevelt's chief of staff was George Perkins, an experienced man in solving various difficult tasks. Perkins would have to try to negotiate a more lucrative deal with the photographer. If you were in his place, how would you deal with these negotiations?
But after a careful analysis of the situation, he decided to enter into negotiations with Moffett a little differently and sent him a telegram of the following content: "We are going to distribute three million brochures with a photo of Roosevelt on the cover. This is a great opportunity for a photographer. How much are you willing to pay if we use your work? We need an immediate response.”
Moffett replied quickly, “Thank you for the opportunity, I’m willing to pay $250.”

The man parodying Vladimir Vladimirovich in the Kamedi Club has already aged. Vladimir Vladimirovich is not.