bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №142153
 13.06.2017
Patriarch Kirill considered 200 new temples in Moscow insufficient.
- We are still very behind the "Five", although we have overtaken the "Dixie".

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №142152
 13.06.2017
Neradence: Just I pulled out that fur ass from behind the couch where he’s stuck, as he got into the closet, pulled on him from the refrigerator, and now passed under the ceiling to the other side of the headset and pretends he can’t go down, so it has to be removed and taken on.
and ah. very credible. You might think, I don’t know, how easily you jump from the second floor into the window with the fearlessness of a ninja and get into a fight with a neighbor’s dog.
Cats are the most agile attenshvhoras that nature has just invented.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142151
 13.06.2017
Adult working people with grandmothers do not live!
YYY: Do they give away to the elderly home?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №142150
 13.06.2017
XX: Restraint is adorning man.
zzz: The skulls of their enemies decorate a man even better.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №142149
 13.06.2017
I live at sea. What do you order me to go on holiday in the summer?

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №142148
 13.06.2017
Review of Assassin's Creed:
xxx: a man falls from one and a half meters high and so AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
yyy: suddenly fall from a metre height down the head. I’ll see what you’re doing, but nothing bad.
LOL: I wasn’t like that when I was a child.
YYY: That explains a lot.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №142147
 13.06.2017
The duality

As an example of the fourfoldness, I will give the work of Schopenhauer "On the fourfold root of the law of sufficient basis." With numerals larger than four, the design does not survive for the same reason that in primitive languages there are no numerals larger than 10: there is no need. Formally, you can construct a fifth and a tenth and use it. Occasionalism will come out, but it will not spread and will not be consolidated, because the language does not need such words.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №142146
 13.06.2017
An open event in the kindergarten. The teacher asks questions. According to a carefully rehearsed scenario, the children raise their hands and react boldly. Everything is boring and uniform. Only one boy was not at the rehearsals, nor does he want to accept the role assigned to him. He raises his hand on all questions, but the teacher ignores him. Finally, he breaks out of patience and after asking the teacher, “Why was the duck called ugly?” he jumps up and cries loudly, “Because he is a toilet!” The hall explodes with a wild whistle. Not funny was only the teacher and the mother of the boy, who, reddened, ran out into the corridor.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142145
 13.06.2017
I thought I, as a former editor, would no longer be surprised by anything. It was a mistake to see today on a forum that a schoolboy is looking for the title of a movie about a pathological anatomist who talked to the dead.

[ + 39 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №142144
 12.06.2017
Not everybody was badly borrowed, but stupid unstoppable mothers with their uneducated offspring! Today in the bank, one mom tried to do her business, when one girl was running, and the other was chasing her on a selfie! In the bank! And both whispered like siren...Isolate your children if they are not taught how to behave in society. I won’t go to a children’s cafe or a playground – I’m even scared to think about it! But the bank...a quiet, quiet haven...and the last one was taken away!! to

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №142143
 12.06.2017
You’re talking about Linux, the server, and the hard days of the sapport... And I’m happy to agree to help one wretched woman (a great specialist in her field!) Find out on Windows 10. Types of windows incomprehensible pops up, well, I think in a couple of hours I'll fix it. I came in and just fell into the precipitation - it turned out to be PAPKI. The usual files. She never in her life sat behind the comp, only because of someone else's shoulder saw, and then bought a notepad on the 10th! Well, we learned with her to click the mouse, print the letters in the notebook...In 5 hours we learned the right and left buttons, created a whole of three folders and two txt))) Peter, by the way, we live in, and she is a very nice person. She said that her son was unable to teach her azam — patience was not enough — so she called me. Surprisingly close by. All are good!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №142142
 12.06.2017
Photo manicure by men
What a terrible nail!
Zzzz: You haven’t seen your feet yet.
Www: photo of Rosomaha
Yyy: I’m sorry, but do you feel comfortable cleaning up? of academic interest.
Vvv: Wiping - no, scratching - convenient

[ + 45 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №142141
 12.06.2017
I studied in class 8. The story happened in a geography lesson.

I looked at some comparative statistics on Russia, and here I noticed that the amounts are more than 100% out. Usually I preferred to remain silent, let someone else sneak, but here it was bombarded - I raised my hand and noticed that there was some mismatch.

The teacher did not agree with me, and no one in the class stood on my side, although the people were not stupid. Everyone laughed, and I was surprised how it happened.

The next lesson was history. Why did I remember this? And because in the middle of the class, a geography teacher looked in, asked for permission to enter and apologized to me.

She said that my confidence in the mistake did not give her peace, she went for advice to the teacher of mathematics, and she confirmed to her that the textbook was wrong.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №142140
 12.06.2017
and Eugenia :
There is a refrigerator in the corridor. There is a bakery in the refrigerator. There is a box on the bakery. On the box under the very ceiling, a cat sits and wonder: what is "never" and "breast" and how can these two ugly words relate to oxygen?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142139
 12.06.2017
Why did you go looking for a new job?
ууу: Yes, it was the case, we went on a big trip around Estonia, there the dialogue was about this:
SS: Leesh, I look, you started to run. How are you at the pace?
WOW: Well, 4:30 somewhere at the pulse of 150, I add slowly.
SS is not bad. Not far from the triathlon. How many kilometers do you sail?
Kick: Light, you better ask how much he earns, it’s more important in triathlon!
WOW: It was sad.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №142138
 12.06.2017
Priority of holidays. She went to me somehow before my colleague's vacation and began to blame me for what I'm going for the second time in the summer (the vacation we've crushed), here's the xxx, she has a child. One parent for the whole department, xxh was fine and did not object, especially since her child was 15, and the schedule of holidays was approved in December. And then this protector of foreign children taught me that I don’t go there, "I need to go to the sea in the summer"))

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №142137
 12.06.2017
News "In Chita in the apartment of the sisters of the employee of the mail found two tons of letters"

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №142136
 12.06.2017
I am unwittingly upset when I hear the word "selfie".
Pichincha volcano is 4500 meters high, it is impossible to walk, and it is necessary to walk, 11 kilometers. And here is all this suffocating red-roze crowd with sticks dictating, suffocating, how they are gorgeous here and generally they are nice. 30 with palms. The Roman, his mother, a legion with stendars is going to conquer Pichincha!

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №142135
 12.06.2017
My father loves Russian rock, especially the DGT group. Since I was a kid, he has included many songs of DDD, I liked them. One song I remember very well is Boys Major. There was such a line of ‘...weighted rice, journalists, magnats, poets and super singers...’. I first heard it at 8 years old and since then I remember strongly that rice can’t be eaten, otherwise I’ll be fat. My grandmother always wondered why I didn’t eat rice at all. Now I am 24 years old and yesterday I, when I accidentally stumbled on the DHT and decided to listen, learned that there were the words of the fattened ACTRIS. Actress, shit, not from rice!
You could have eaten rice all the time, right? and :(

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №142134
 12.06.2017
In a country where the main troubles are the fools and the roads, it is cruel to require people to come on time.

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