>>zzz: Sex is when the need for teenage is satisfied by a woman.

A woman’s hand is asked when she is tired.

“Look, I bought a waterproof watch, 50 meters hold.
Why do you need a waterproof watch?
Suddenly I will fall under the rain.
Under 50 meters?

Stx: My kids burned out yesterday.
We went out, we stood near the entrance.
and there on a sidewalk two non-riding riddans - kopecks (vaz 2101)
The younger (3 years) carefully examines the rusted bumper, the wheels dropped
And he says: "Papa, look at me. The car was broken"
and the oldest (5 years old): "he was not broken. This is Gigi!and "

Are you working again?
I want to be rich.
Does it happen?
and almost. But my tired roses have ceased to recognize.

I have a colleague, a nice and kind man. Because of the circumstances, we always come to the office first. A wonderful Monday morning. We are alone. I’m in the headphones, trying to work, and the ugly keyboard is constantly stuck. I can't stand such arbitrariness on her part, I begin to scream: "Why do you, she, don't work, I'm working here in the morning, and you don't!!", I break the headphones, I raise my eyes, a colleague, pressing a sandwich, looks at me frightened and sneezing, so complaining: "I eat"...

The Ugadi Weather
I look out the window, there is a butterfly. True, beautiful, "snow turns, snow flies" I open the window, and there is a drop! Drops of drums, streams of journals, cars on the fields are cut.
Neither give nor take, again in the matrix video and sound were synchronized.

In 2006 I went to Turkey with my parents. I was young, 13 years old. In three days I gathered a small company of peers in a hotel from different countries. So we gathered somewhere in the morning to chew. A boy stands next to the pool. Let’s think we’ll take him into the company too. I approach him as the most blatant:

Hello to you! The Russian?

He moves his head. “No”

The English?

He moves his head. “No”

The French?

“No”

The Doyle?

“No”

Fuck, who are you?

- Belarusian

Weapons in the Metro

Salt olive in the subway is also not forbidden, but I have never seen anything like that.
"Bla, as the hunting of olive is straight to swallow, I will not reach my station".

They split up when she decided not to communicate with me, but only to sit on my neck and grab my brain. What did I do wrong? Or am I the only one?

Do you seriously expect five lines of your post to tell you exactly what you did wrong "? And that your conflict with your already hated ex-wife (a great indicator) will crumble in your favor only because you complained here? We would also learn a lot about you, be sure.

Only when the funeral will be carried out at the expense of the treating doctor, medicine will really become - paid.

Yesterday I ran along the Volga coast in Samara, on a quiet sunny day. Loved vessels on airbags cutting across the ice. They look spectacular - everyone has huge ears, like Cheburashka, with propellers from Carlson. I was crazy to fly like that. But it must be expensive. Finally I accepted the thought that a thousand and a half is worth that happiness. And if they are two, then they are gone. They reached the base from where they started. There were six of them, different types. I watched from a distance those who sat down pretending to throw a price. God knows what elite tourists, grandmothers are. Probably to pull. I ran, I asked - how much the excursion time (I am soon to the airport), and how much it costs.

The uncle-captain of the aircraft on the pillow looked at me ironically. He replied, “60 rubles. We are not a tour, but a trip. The municipal transportation.”

A celebration of something. Let the modest pensions, but in which other country can grandmothers fly on the ice for less than a dollar?

“Sema, I want to tell you that it has become very difficult to climb the career ladder now.
“Abram, I’ll tell you more, it’s even hard to get to her.

Here’s how to make such a great calambur:

Because of the lack of a maid, we live with a courtyard.

In the original was: "for the lack of a maid we have a courtyard".

I haven’t watched news on TV for three weeks. It turned on, and Trump is no longer ours. Oh well ok. So even easier. We will now know who is to blame if the entrance is not cleaned up.
Obama will hand over to Trump the keys from the home phones of Russian entrances.

xxx: Interested in the story "Lucifer" on Lost. Satan is on the ground to rest, falls in love with a girl policeman and helps her solve criminal cases... well, I don’t know, compared to the hunters of demons from the Supernaturals (let’s take a section of the first five seasons, which are considered a classic of the genre, and then part of the audience begins to care).
YYY: It depends on how you present. The plot of any movie looks like a shit, for example: a man flies into space, looks at his daughter from a bookcase and shakes the arrow in a black hole.

here here :

If your acquaintance went to your mother for 5 minutes a day, I believe you never saw her. And that I lived a week and never saw a cat - no. As the saying goes, go, know the measure. That the voice of the cat never gave, neither whispered, nor murmured, with a stretch, I can believe: there are silent individuals. But in seven days, a mother with her daughter never took a cat on her arms to scratch, scratch and scratch the ear - it is already completely beyond the possibility.

If you sit and walk all day, staring your eyes at the phone, you can not only notice the cat, but also the mother.

I always thought I was a complete profan in everything about comps. But even I was uncomfortable when my boyfriend, who took to clean my system from dust (seemingly, it was necessary to at least somehow self-affirm, to show that he is a man), telling me something with a smart look, called the cooler a hard drive. For a long time I proved that he was wrong and that I know what this iron looks like, because I bought the whole filling of this system.

Posts in a group of acquaintances
Anonymous please. I am looking for a young man, who today at about 17:30 accidentally took the chips at the box office in Magnete (street. Then he followed me and brought them back to himself. I want to share these chips with you first, and then my life!

I like it: 19

xxx: nothing to yourself, first pressed the chips, and then the life is plagued.

<zoi> it is normal people in nightmares dream of monsters, and I dream of html and raw exceptions.

From the school composition: "The boy received a bad assessment".