bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №136561
 05.12.2016
X: The lecturer began by saying that all our ethics is about God, and not less.
I immediately asked to clarify what God specifically meant. There were at least 10 Muslims in the audience out of 40 present, so I asked to further clarify what number of wives to consider ethical – one or even four.
The professor spoke something even more ambiguously than usual, and he did not give me any more words throughout the course. But "written out" to me in the end, which was quite enough for me.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №136560
 05.12.2016
of life:
A love triangle with three dumb corners)))

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №136559
 05.12.2016
The Parental Forum. Russian-speaking resident of London.

I broke up the awkward callers. They call with an Indian accent and ask, “How are you doing, madam?” and “So I’m going to sell something or cheat.” They say: "About your computer". I calmly answer: "I have no computer". And sometimes they say: "About your mobile". And I say on my mobile that I don’t have a mobile... They’re losing... %) %) %) :crazy: :crazy: :crazy:
Sometimes I say they went to the police. And my brother likes to take the phone and say in a strict voice: "Dudaev’s Headquarters. The Police Department"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №136558
 05.12.2016
Personally, I was tired of the dinosaur habit of slightly swallowing and asthmatically spilling, stretching the saliva between the cloves. This stamp of artistic and scholarly films is completely unbearable.
I’m waiting for Chinese scientists to prove that dinosaurs were singers.
They will be able to rebuild them.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №136557
 05.12.2016
Discussion on geektimes of an American businessman, one
The price of the medication increased by 100 percent.
For such people there is a special place in hell.
The throne?
zzz: with heating

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №136556
 05.12.2016
I watched Mr. Robot. The woman next to him is doing something and is listening to the ears.
Elliot, the main character, comes to meet with a mysterious hacker who is known by the name “White Rose”. The hacker is incredibly cool. I decided to guess what would surprise the screenwriters of the series and say:
And then it turns out that “White Rose” is an 8-year-old school boy.
My wife calmly:
Or Yuri Shatunov.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №136555
 05.12.2016
The AAA:
My girlfriend once said:
Even if the whole world is against you, I will silently stand behind your back and quietly supply you with ammunition.
So when the menta took me, she said she saw me for the first time and ran away. The cock.

The BBB:
I forgot the ammunition.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №136554
 05.12.2016
They have a neighbor, and they have a dog. I say someone at the end of the street has dogs fighting. They are probably coyotes. I - O_O

Hashtag "Canada", hashtag "Life in a Small City "

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №136553
 04.12.2016
From the Telegram:
Where to buy coffee? Ordinary small hand.
Grain in a bag, and a hammer on them

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №136552
 04.12.2016
About the ass.
I was 6. Swimming in the river. He went out and pressed his cowards. There are no bushes nearby. The grandmother says: turn your ass to everyone and press out - the ass of everyone is the same, that of men, that of women, it is not ashamed.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №136551
 04.12.2016
xxx: oh, this is unforgettable from Chinese sites
xhx: rubber sanitary pad = "waterproof control point"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №136550
 04.12.2016
The habit of walking around the courtyard in gallows - swing your feet and go for yourself, convenient and practical. Once the strawberries got caught, or the sellers trumped into the bag, or in the warehouse of finished products into a bunch, - the seller in the market said that they level up when they stand. not settled out. It took about a year until it dried up and broke. As I put my clothes on, as I put on both hands, so I remember the torgash with the words: the fools sell, and the idiots earn. In the subsequent purchases, the галоши chose the normal ones, and once again forgot and swung on the "hold in hot water, they are leveled". not settled out. I remember the fools and idiots. They know how to sell.
So a friend sold beef, - in cows with experience, the fat became yellow, buyers had a question. The phrase "maize fed" was used. The meat was sold.
By the way, why am I writing, maybe anyone knows how to level up the gallows? and share.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №136549
 04.12.2016
For fools the law is not written, the mark on the road is not stamped.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №136548
 04.12.2016
In Iceland, near the Vatnajökull glacier, on which the volcano Hvanadalshnucur is located, between the cities of Habnarfjordur and Fagurhouliemiri, and the small island of Westmannajökull, is located at first sight not a remarkable city of Vic.

xxx: Imagine the French who write about the fact that somewhere far away in Russia, in the Urals, between the settlements of Novokaolinovii and Nagaibakskii, there is a village with the no-not-not-not-not-not name of Paris.

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136547
 04.12.2016
You said that information from the internet is enough for fair elections. We have a terrible internet in the village, young people only on social networks. The influence of television is huge. We didn’t work on television for a month so my wife became a dissident. Now the new TV, the wife is happy with the election of Trump etc. etc. The opinion has changed to the opposite! The role of the Internet should not be overstated.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №136546
 04.12.2016
Not for the sake of boredom, but for justice: like gold, it is not titanium carbide, but titanium nitrite.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №136545
 04.12.2016
I’m going home with my bags full of five. I go into the elevator and press my floor button. With the scream “Oh man, wait for me!” A girl runs to the elevator. Since my hands are busy with bags, I stretch out my leg so that the lifts do not close. The girl from her side is trying to do the same with her bag. As a result, my leg pulls off her bag, the rope closes, the elevator runs.

Girl, if you are reading this: honestly, I’m not intentionally!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №136544
 04.12.2016
Early morning. To a woman who is not waking up in bed, there are two people - a husband and a hungry cat.In the end, she can't stand and comes up with the words: OK! Now I will give you something and you will leave me, animal! Both aggressors were delighted. But, husband, who clarified: Dear, and who exactly did you mean? I did not receive an answer. And I didn’t get anything (

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №136543
 04.12.2016
Who is in the airplane today?
I do not recommend this place to visit.
You should go there with your lover.
Tagged: fucking
Dmitry Automotive
Dmitry: With a shotgun *

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №136542
 04.12.2016
Good relationships improve relationships.

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