bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №98093
 18.05.2014
The pepper cork rolling on the asphalt at one point taught a sliding, silent citizen to speak, and his first word was not his mother, although his mother was present in this phrase.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98092
 18.05.2014
A minute of humor with the Russian Post.
At work I have to carry a lot of different keys, and since I have Narnia in my bag, I decided to order a keyboard for Ali. I ordered, paid, waiting for packages in the snowed Tomsk (on the street February). Two weeks later, the track lights up at the Beijing airport, after which there is silence. On May 7, the app on the phone gladly informs me that my package is not somewhere, but in the glorious city of Novosibirsk (to Tomsk about 300 km). Previous experience suggests that somewhere in a week the package should reach me. And indeed, the app on the phone wakes up again in 10 days and joyfully tells me that my package is in a glorious city... Samara, 2584 km from Tomsk... Even a bit offensive that some keyboard travels more than me)

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №98091
 18.05.2014
Gay, gay... You first allow polygamy. Polygamy for discriminated Muslims and polygamy for company, so as not to be offensive.
Or you, you understand, still traditional not all rights are ensured, and you are already about non-traditional cotton.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №98090
 18.05.2014
Russian rescuers evacuated more than two thousand people from flood zones in Serbia
Where are the American rescuers? Why are they not seen anywhere in the world?
They are all involved in 911.
What about Chip Dale?! to

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №98089
 18.05.2014
...collective, on the control panel, small, large... in general, I take a step in their direction, but... in a moment I remember that I am 23 years old and sadly continue to melt to products.

It reminded me how a 22-year-old girlfriend was crushed that she saw slick shoes of bright yellow color, but after all she is not a teenager anymore, but a solid lady... And I sit next to her in my 30s in wide pants with overlapping pockets, a T-shirt with Bart Simpson and a backpack, and I don’t know what to say to her XDD

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98088
 18.05.2014
Appreciate your loved ones and inspire. I only have a cat and a computer.

Generally speaking, the idea is right – value what you have. But only a year later, she is already married and deeply pregnant? Does not give any thought?
/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

How did she dare, really?
to meet another and become pregnant, and it is instead of a year to wear mourning for the bpowering her mudic))))

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №98087
 18.05.2014
boblenin
I have a great editor. Its major disadvantage is the high entry threshold.

Qw1
Entrance to VIM is easy. But coming out to an unprepared person is a problem.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №98086
 18.05.2014
We sit in the house at the table, a five-year-old boy runs and screams:
Guess what I have in my pocket?
The adult choir:
The ring!

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №98085
 18.05.2014
The Peders!
Get rid of the gays!
– – – – –
and Barrymore! Are you gay?! to
No, I’m just down, sir.
Why not with a woman?
Don’t give it, sir.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98084
 18.05.2014
I read Mr. Initiatives on the ROI website... and here:
This will force absolutely all dog owners, at least to comply with the already adopted laws, in particular - not to walk dogs in places where there are people without a namordnik..."
I read over. "Where there are people without a namordnik"
People without a murderer!
I think.
The initiative is generally really good, but, people... Even when you write such serious things, check it out. And then they’ll get the stuff...

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98083
 18.05.2014
The rope holds down Fafnir, a giant wolf.
_____

People, don’t give in to the proverbs of Loki – the name of that wolf is Fenrir!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98082
 18.05.2014
From Habr:

The aircraft has already been used, has successfully survived a lot of carrots. For those who are not in the topic - carrots are such a figure of the highest pilot, when the aircraft is stuck with its nose in the ground :-)

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98081
 18.05.2014
on one of the entertainment resources of the network, someone suffering from justice in relation to various food additives, flavourings and even with them, laid out the article of his own hand:
- I am a chemist... bla... lovers of reading the composition... bla-bla... sees something there and shuts his eyes in horror.
- "The thickener in the yogurt will almost be some starch"
The majority of food additives are no less natural than all the other ingredients of the product.
And all in such a spirit, reassuring and reassuring.
He smiled, in fact, with a comment:

Dmitry: In all this, I am personally most stressed that the "Lemon cake" that I ate for dessert has in composition (aromatizer identical to natural lemon), and a detergent with the aroma of lemon which I then washed dishes has in composition (Lemon extract natural).
How is it?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №98080
 18.05.2014
Iza very much did not want to call his father-in-law, but the month ended, the free minutes were not spent, and all the others he already took... tired.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98079
 18.05.2014
Start from far away.
Have you ever seen someone falling badly? What did you feel about yourself? I dare assume that it was a short-lived pulse of pain (or simply increased sensitivity) in that part of your body that corresponds to the damaged place of the fallen person. Or you see someone eating something incredibly tasty/acid/salty – while the receptors in your mouth immediately react. Someone sweetly pulled - your muscles immediately react.
This tool, laid down by nature, is empathy. It helps you better and faster understand what a particular person is doing right now. The body projects what it sees onto your body before you can understand the information. It helps you properly process this information.
I am for what. There are gay and lesbian. Most people are deeply indifferent to their intimate life. Exactly until it is displayed. Men kissing people cause indignation in natural men precisely at the expense of empathy. For the same reason, the apparently kissing lesbian couple in men does not cause much protest.
What to do with this information? and nothing. Just think out loud.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №98078
 18.05.2014
There is no age limit for information. That is the preamble.
I was with my kids in Spain 10 years ago. In Barcelona, the elderly (15) decided that he wanted to see the sea. I found the nearest water section on the map (there was just the port) and wanted us to go there. And we are not interested in looking at the port, and secondly, my husband's back was wildly sick - 2 km he was dragged with a fist. In short, we decided that the older man himself would go to the port (he knows Spanish better than us all) and we with the younger (12) take a taxi back to the center and go to the erotic museum.
From this was born the phrase of the younger, which became family-friendly - you are lucky, you looked at the ships, and I was dragged into this boring museum.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №98077
 18.05.2014
>>>>
I tell you. One day I went to a festival and was among the prize-winners. I come back – the boss invites me and asks – do you sing songs? I say yes, I sing. That’s what the boss says. You either stop it, or write on your own. No shame at the office.
It turned out that I was mentioned in a post in the JJ of a completely unfamiliar girl. Remember, it has been enough.

Your boss is a real fool and fascist. Get rid of him until he has invented anything else. You will not shut down the song. Even a high salary, right?

[ + 16 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98076
 18.05.2014
bbb: Conchita managed to hang complexes to both sexes at once :) Her figure is more chic than most women, and her beard is more chic than most men.

[ + 39 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98075
 18.05.2014
I am the idiot who left my wife because she became less interesting than when I fell in love with her. She didn’t betray me, she loved me, she did everything for me. I thought it wasn’t enough and I left. In a year I changed more than 10 girls, on the second day of communication convincing that they are not even close to worthy to stand with my ex-wife.
This is what I have to do: I decided to go and accept, I found her deeply pregnant and married, all the same happy, and with a smile without which I left her with my claims. Men, don’t be like me, appreciate your loved ones and inspire them. I only have a cat and a computer.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №98074
 18.05.2014
From one forum to the question of synchronization of female cycles:
They organize female special forces, wait for synchronization, and then for days with the PMS plan special operations that require the use of force and special cruelty.

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