From a mother’s life:
Stephan’s son was taken to his mother. Dima’s husband at work. I was alone at home! All the day! No one orated (Stepa), did not want to eat (Dima), did not give me advice (mama), did not suck a cat (Stepa), did not throw things (Dima), did not kill non-stop (mama), did not pull me for my hair (Stepa), did not leave on the table coffee cups (Dima), did not wipe out these cups (mama). I listened to music loudly, scattered everything, walked with a shaken head, did not wash the cup and slept on the bed in clothes (all is forbidden). I was even sad to sleep that day. Sleep is an unconscious state. And I wanted to feel every minute, to understand it, to feel it.
Previously, this was not appreciated. What I used to call loneliness and longing is now a Mediterranean cruise and an avid party.
For the first time in a year, I stayed home alone. For the first time in a year, I am alone in this apartment. I’ll go, I think, popping up on the bucket in the corridor.
Then I turn and swing on my back, pushing my legs back and dividing my hands to the sides.
And I’ll turn on that kind of music that I usually say, “Are you crazy? I don’t listen to this, it’s Yuri Antonov.”
P.S About the cat. As soon as the door closed behind everyone, the cat fell where he was going. Sleeping or losing consciousness.

In principle, if you do not buy anything, then the prices are normal.

Hi, I am on an interview.

Good morning, but to whom?

N: I do not know.

I: For what vacancy?

N: I do not know.

I: What do you know?

N: Well... I don’t know.

Q: (seriously) The Director in our company already exists.

>>> The retirement age in Belarus has been raised by three years.
The document is aimed at improving pension provision in changing socio-demographic conditions.

The law of the Russian Federation on registration at the place of residence is called "On the right of citizens of the Russian Federation to freedom of movement, choice of place of stay and residence within the Russian Federation".

I bought jeans today. I went into the sample, I sample... suddenly, I hear, a male voice is delivered from the neighboring cabin (with such a capricious intonation, in a scream, breaking into a whisper).

Don’t make me wear that shit!

- Well, Serezh... - a woman’s voice, quite calm, sounded.

Wear them because you like them.

The jeans are good.

Are you stupid? I want the same ones you brought me from Italy that year!!! to

But...

I want them! All of it!! to

In this spirit, five minutes. I came out of the sample and saw how the capricious Sereza (years 25 in sight) threw a woman (years 40-45) in the face of jeans and with the words "You ruined my day!" Leaving the store...

I don't know who it was or who those people were, but I had a desire to catch Serez and fuck him.

I was at work and my phone called.

I am : Hi.

I believe in Nicholas.

I: Unfortunately there is no such thing.

She: How can I address you?

I am Sergey.

She: - I would like to invite you to go to the theatre for a comedy.

I: Thank you, it is not interesting.

She: Well, we would go with a girl, have fun, have fun.

I: We don’t like fun. I said it because I’m tired of advertising.

She: How is it? They love to have fun!!! to

There she gave me a genius idea.

We are Goths. We do not like fun.



At that end of the wire, a pattern quietly broke and a sharp wild laugh in the tube. I was already at the limit and also started to roast. Then they said, “Goodbye. I don’t go into your life anymore.”

I remember working in the export department of a large factory. We sold the tubes. I translated our Soviet guests into English for the Chinese so that they could do the same for our guests. One big contract for a lot of money dragged us into a long job hole without weekends. I watched the movie while that. The film was “House of Wax Figures”. The employee asks how I feel about the movie, I say the movie fucking, but one plus is that Peris Hilton is coolly killed. It is wrapped in a tube. The employee asked, “Which tube?” I answered without blinking the eye with "the seamless austenitic tenth." Then pause and roast.

For several years, he broke up between his family and his mouse. All this time he suffered morally, because at home his wife and child were waiting for him, and the mistress walked around rental apartments. Finally his conscience could not stand. He decided to act like a true gentleman: to marry a mistress, and transport her to himself.

said and done. The ex-wife and child were courteously exposed at the door. And with the mistress they played a wedding, and began to build a happy marriage. Advice, as they say, yes love!

I recently met him: lost weight, drowned, small eyes run frightened. They talked.

Immediately after marriage, the mouse was replaced. From a playful girl, she turned into a sturdy aunt, and the formation of the Matriarchate took place in the family.

Another sad circumstance is pathological jealousy, because:

A mouse knows that the spouse is not faithful (who knows how she does not know it).

B) Mouse knows all of his donjuan tricks (because before his former wife he usually excused her/her).

In this regard, any meetings with friends, corporations, fishing and so on are prohibited in the family. The phone and correspondence of the spouse are checked daily. There is a check call every hour. In other words, the situation is close to fiasco.

I tried as much as I could to encourage him. But at this moment, the happy spouse was called by the Mouse, and he, relying on the phone, ran somewhere.



Gleb Ponomarev ©

Yesterday I went with my family to Dacia. While I was playing Matt Damon from The Martian, my grandfather and grandmother planted tomatoes and prepared greenhouses for them. Having finished planting the potatoes, he went to help them, and actually to install the bows and cover them with a film. To add to the rigidity of the design, the bows were connected with the twisted steam, which my grandfather was kindly provided by the installers, who in the winter carried the equipment from the roof to the entrance.

Satisfied with the resulting design, he said:

What a benefit of the internet!

One of my colleagues told me today. Her friend has a cat - a prosthetic black and white, but beloved. When he became old, the blindness disappeared, he loved to spend hours and days, in thoughtfulness lying in the shed, from where he came out only for important affairs. And the hostess bought another - but not a simple one, but a Persian with a genealogy. They lived friendly, the peach grew up, began to target, of course. A call from the club says, “There’s a girl for your boy.” The Persian girl was brought and the cats, shocked at the beginning of the first meeting, soon joyfully took up petting and role-playing games. The owners, washing up, went for a walk, like, let them alone. The old man in the garbage was forgotten, or he simply showed no interest in anything.

Kisa left, the owner soon called, said - all OK, valuable Persian cats to be. You know what cats are.

Here is a growing generation for whom the Brigade is a classic.

Recently, sports news in the search engine resembles the news tape of the achievements of the pharmaceutical industry

What is the name of the girl who gives her roses? Well, in the sense, it goes into some chemistry and it then leaves roots and all things?

><><><
Bernard Shaw would have called her “a thin flower store,” and you would have called her “my beautiful lady.”

The children did some creative work that had to be sent to the contest. I asked my grandmother to buy a envelope. She left, half an hour she was not there, an hour, we are already worried - the mail is five minutes walk from home... She comes an hour and a half and says: I had to go to another department - we had no... marks. There was no Morocco in the Russian Post Office, Karl!!! to

XX: I bought a laser plane builder.
XXX: For digging in the garden is a great thing! and :)

YYYYYYYYYYY
XXX: What
YYY: What will we eat?
xxx: I don’t know
XXX: What do you want?
YYY: to eat
XXX is logical

At our entrance there was a rumor that a man had died alone, and this rumor, because of her speech, was unwittingly spread by the woman of Tamara. It turned out that everything was okay with the man, and today, when he saw her, he says to her: See, Tamara, Easter has not yet come, and I have already risen!

I had a friend who liked to tell that he had an IQ of 92, and since the average is 90, it means that he has a higher intelligence than the average, and was very proud of it.
Now I can easily recognize this subtle line: under-average intelligence is when you don’t really know what the average is, don’t read the test cap (and generally the small font in any documents), don’t google in case of doubts, and in principle never doubt your correctness.

xxx: News "A tower crane fell in India onto the Air India aircraft it carried" and I am: Staaa?
Yyy: Oh, these Hindus with their physics...

Lizardian: “A collection of cult photographs of the last 100 years that demonstrate the grief of loss and the triumph of the human spirit.”
I like such names. It’s a pity that they don’t write – a unique photo you could have seen a hundred times in a collection of 100 unique photos you’ve never seen.