The morning is foggy, Monday, the family fellow sleeps with their eyes open. In this idyllic Chelyabinsky (because the harsh) meteorite enters the part responsible for the house, as always on the energy jizer: "Comrades, you again [...], and again all the reserves of toilet paper spent! I can’t put it out! I do not succeed!! What are you doing with her?and "
From an angle melancholic: "We eat her ass..."

The Duma passed a law allowing deputies to be deprived of mandate for passing
410 deputies may be fired

I went to the zoo today. In the terrarium, my mom first plunged into the process of breeding a pair of frogs for a long time, taking a screw on the phone, and then, looking at some kind of snake, gave out:
What a beautiful snake! This is a great belt!

I have malin training.
All three times!
The grandmother stood up, said the shorts. I did not believe but took it.
Vauu: Labutene now shake her off - you will be the first guy in the village

One of me is angry when you read a quote, and there "What is it, when?". So the hunt to ask "Which h.. you did not learn Russian at school"?

Divorce with my wife. I called my aunt to find out. I proposed a compromise - she takes her daughter, and I take my own and we separate the world.

We have a 9-year-old cat and a child. The cat is patient enough to treat the child, if he gets a lot - he just leaves. I, understanding that the child is growing, the imagination and speed of movement is developing, and the patience of the cat is not unlimited, I decided to hold a lecture on OBŽ. I picked up a cat, called the daughter and said:
- Our cat only looks so soft and furry, but it has sharp nails (pressed on the cat's foot and showed them to the child) and large teeth (showed cat's teeth), so you don't have to pull it hard for the tail, legs and wool, it can scratch or bite painfully. understandably?
Show your teeth again.
He showed and dropped both in opposite directions. After a few minutes I observe the effect of the lecture, unfortunately, the opposite: the daughter chases a cat with a scream:
Show your teeth, show your teeth.

to the religious. Elected from the new "human rights defender" in the Russian Federation:

“I understood that it was impossible to grasp the foundations of law without the knowledge of moral and moral values and began to study religious literature deeply and seriously, began to meet and talk with Orthodox priests more often.”

You know, yes...

“In my first dissertation, I am one of the first [in Russia] to propose to introduce a rule in the law that no one has the right to testify against himself or his close relatives. I propose a rule that prohibits recognizing as evidence any testimony obtained under pressure, threats, blackmail.”

Disorder about what has existed for hundreds of years in law

The Ministry of Internal Affairs was renamed VČK (All-Russian Emergency Commission, headed by Felix Dzerzhinsky). “And we need to give him [the ministry] the appropriate powers to bring order, keep the country at peace and security.”

Human rights of. We know these people and what right they want to protect.

From ZH, to appoint an elderly general to monitor human rights:

Wait a little longer, plastic human rights of categories A, B, C, D, E will soon be released. With compulsory training and passing exams for the appropriate category."

Jesus of the Brain

A 33-year-old resident of California claims that the accident she caused was because she saw the image of Jesus in the KitKat barrel. Marlo Thomas said she was driving south on highway I-15, as she suddenly wanted to eat sweets. She says, “This feeling came up suddenly, I felt like I needed sugar. I picked up the chocolate, opened it, and when I bite a piece, I couldn’t believe my eyes. It was Jesus! I mean, right there, in my chocolate bar! It was like he told me I was chosen. I closed my eyes and started praying, thanking Him for the revelation.

According to Thomas, the collision with the car that was in front of her occurred during a prayer. The speed of the collision was 75 miles per hour. The car, which was hit, crashed into the front cars, which were blocked due to the accident, which happened two miles away. "Miracle" Thomas managed only minor cuts and scratches, thus remaining virtually unharmed. She said, “Jesus saved me. Because I prayed, I was not hurt. The guy who was in front of me was not lucky. If he had prayed, it would not have been so bad for him. Apparently, he did not pray. He should use his time more wisely.”

As a Buddhist to a pagan, I advise you to answer this Muslim woman in a Christian way: I will do to you just as you do to me. c) grandy_mc

XXX: What are you doing?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY I made a mistake and now I am trying to correct it.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
YYY: It does not work. I think so and leave, no one will notice anyway.
The same goes for programming =)

What in your name... I have long decided to call my daughter Barbara, the original old name, I thought, so it turned out that she was born in December. On December 12, a TV show was broadcast about the Great Martyr Barbara. In general, the district pediatrician told me later "You are my fourteenth newborn Barbara" :)

She works as a teacher in primary school, 3rd grade.
M is shorter
M: Today we were told to give 6 lessons a class hour on the subject of religion
M: I decided to read them the chapter from MIM
The story of Pilate and Jesus
M: Comes to me after a classy hour boy
Q: What is the name of the book you read? Well, about the prosecutor and the dog!"
M: I had difficulty holding the rod.

Amazing is nearby.

Today (early yesterday) on the way to work almost struck down a pigeon, slowly and lazily crossing the road over the pedestrian crossing at the height of the front glass.

Jesus (& Co) promised the death of all sinners.
One promised the death of all the ice giants.

I personally don’t see ice giants around.
© by

When did you last go to the theater and what did you do?
Five years ago, I don't remember what, I was asleep at the beginning.
Hm, why did you go then?
to sleep...
Have you been to the opera once?
I usually don’t remember what I do when I sleep.)

Victor Zinchuk wrote on FB:
“Stop faking that I’ve allegedly reacted badly to the play of such great guitarists as Richie Blackmore and Ingvey Malstine! And do not include me in the trio "Observers" or what else there invented! I am neither Lozha nor Mikhailov.

What to do if a snake bites: 10 tips of a herpetologist and a snake"

Just sit down and wait a little - soon all the problems will end.

Give up your meaningless stuff!
The heat has come to our city.
It is 28 degrees!
The only thing that stopped me from going to the beach was the shadows of snow hiding in the shadows. Leaves on trees, grass, mother and mother-in-law flowers, and snow!
But that’s what stopped most aunts from taking off their coats and hats, I don’t know.
Siberia is in horror on May 1. They promise zero and snow.