The first comment to the news about the Ukrainian city, in which all the boiler cities transferred to alternative solid fuel - wood:
XX: Somehow I imagined alternative energy sources differently.

In my personal hit-parade of stupidity with a large gap lead citizens who through traffic jams get on a personal car to the fitness center to try to slightly tighten the wrapped belly while sitting behind the wheel.

by Afranius
The funniest thing: when the affars are filmed (and the actors play) about drunkenness and cross-adulters - they are all clearly in place: "I believe!" (c); but it just begins about work (about the teacher's tour with high school students, for example) - immediately there is the same "feeling of shame and embarrassment, until the pushing of fingers in the shoes" (c). That is, the fake sting from the screen is such that there is no longer an allergic rash, but an anaphylactic shock.

and easy:

TTL (time to live) life of the package
There is a mother and a hungry son. The son goes to his mother and asks her to feed him. Mom says she is busy and sends it to Dad. Dad is busy and sends to Mom. This is the time until the son dies and there is TTL.
There were other terms. I don’t remember...who knows write!
It is...
TCP and UDP

UDP is when you argue with a friend in communion, sit at different corners of the room and throw fireworks against each other. He threw - hit, threw the next - missed, threw the third. And then, on that side, there’s a cinderella – the server’s response.

TCP – You have two laptops and only one network cable. You get caught up in it from both ends and try to tear each other out of your hands. A rush there - a rush here, each accompanied by maths. The TCP-IP session is installed.

A friend of mine told me. He works at the customs. So he always roars in the moustaches when he meets "Cossacks" on the street. Because they usually hang clutches from sex shops on the belt, he hangs those clutches and tolls)))

News that the role of the master of Yoda "tried out" a monkey in a mask! Unfortunately, the idea with the monkey failed because the trainers simply couldn’t cope with it. The animal categorically refused to wear a bagged mask and tried to squeeze it all the time.
Commentary
The shootings were interrupted when Master Yoda began to kick his cockroaches into the operator.

to this:
to this:
This wonderful thing is called tampons. But on the packaging it is written that they were developed by a female gynecologist. Do you hear, a woman gynecologist, have you tried your invention to use, having long nails? It’s not just uncomfortable – it’s, fucking, dangerous!

And you would be comfortable if you would be examined by a woman gynecologist with long nails?

In Medunivere, the correct manicure was vaccinated at the subconscious level, because in the department of propedovetics (therapy, so that it would be easier to understand) the nails were forced to be cut (in every school in the table the scissors were lying for such a case, and far from manicure))), there are long nails - there is no permission, because how else to do a percussion or palpation; and in the department of surgery, even the lacquer was forced to be washed voluntarily (do not want-do not wash, but to the classes will not be allowed), only instead of the scissors used 0.5 bottles with acetone or solvent 646. There are no long nails at the doctor. Commercial medicine is easy.

xxx> I remember there was a fishing department in the sports store
xxx> there plastic flies sold
xxx> I was small, bought 10 packs, then played them ))

by Rostov.ru:
The acquaintance today sent (it has a grand vitara three-door)

— — —
I go, it is already dark. Behind me, some shit with such an evil xenon in the tail that I can’t see anything at once. I burst under the nose of the curse, I lean forward, so that the mirrors do not hit my eyes, quietly lowering the speed in front of the light. The hernia is rebuilt in the left row and stretches 1 car forward, it turned out, whether the priora is down, or something else, with the corresponding contingent behind the wheel and on the passenger.
I crawl the tail, and here I am. I rebuild behind him, wrinkle anti-nebula and distant. >: The person includes an accident. My car is high, his low, now all my illumination shines in his face from all the mirrors. I ignore the accident by turning on the TP mode. It is green, the man is not going anywhere. I squeeze my shoulders, I smile, I am not in a hurry. There is an angry signal in the back. There was nowhere to go, I went forward. In short, I drove him another 20 meters to the ring, and I turned it off there to not disturb others.

— — —

One thing is sad - usually such sperm have absolute brain elasticity, and they cannot re-moralize.

The excitement of what has yet to be found on Mars:

- Any new mineral previously thought to be absent on Mars or a new element of the Mendeleev table, as an option.

I’m really tired of joking about the new elements in the Mendeleev table.

What’s so incredible about the new element? The Mendeleev table is just a list of the elements we know that are found on our planet. And the likelihood of finding a new element on another planet is very high.

The probability is roughly the same as finding a previously unknown whole number between 2 and 3.

You haven’t seen the Secrets yet.)

Why do you get depressed, you are young, almost all your life ahead?
Yyy:...full of pain and suffering

Here is this:

From the Medical Forum:
Sergey
My girlfriend has big breasts and it prevents me from having sex. She is thin but her breasts are constantly sticking to my stomach. Advice how to be? It shakes the stomach.

Can someone explain how they do this? My imagination is hurt.

The only interesting moment in "50 Shades of Grey" is when G.G., learning that the heroine is a virgin, was terrified and immediately fucked her.

Here is a way out of any unpleasant situation. of life.

The amazing thing - with friends, with whom fire, water and copper pipes passed, it is absolutely uninteresting to communicate on the network. Well, a joke you will tell, about the weather-work-family a couple of phrases you will twist...with the rest of the network you can talk without stopping!

I saw an old one. I went upgrading, bought my wife a meat cutter in the end. and :)
by :D
Andrew: Well, 250 backs were seen, and the meat machine was the same. The love of the cockroaches won. and :)

Topic on the forum: "I want to be an admin"
xxx: By the way, I recently read an article that the first sign of a latent homosexual is hatred of women
Yyy: What if I’m openly gay and don’t hate women?
XX: It is only about the latent
Zzz: What is the difference between latent and non-latent?
The latent can be tripled, not the latent cannot.
AAA: And why are latent homosexuals discussed in the topic of admin?

How to name the heir:
I should call it Prokhor. Prochor is cool!
What is cool? Better than Armageddon. Imagine"And Armageddon has already come? It is now"

Here you are sitting so harsh and grown up, looking for something there in the innet, drinking champagne from a beautiful glass, the second hour of the night... and suddenly find that you are sitting in the costume hat of the god cow, which the daughter insidiously drunk on me, and I didn't even notice...

We are talking with my husband "hotel" about a new car.
The husband gives:
Wait, did we buy you a cat? I bought!
Meanwhile the cat!
The Grey? and Gray!
Does it hurt the corner? So it’s down!"

to this: x: What does "ping" mean?
-----------
There is an old fairy tale how to explain "on fingers" some terms
Ping in the same room with you sitting Vasya. You scream Vasya went to #@y in response to you sounds go yourself to #@y
Congratulations you just broke up.
TTL (time to live) life of the package
There is a mother and a hungry son. The son goes to his mother and asks her to feed him. Mom says she is busy and sends it to Dad. Dad is busy and sends to Mom. This is the time until the son dies and there is TTL.
There were other terms. I don’t remember...who knows write!