I am 43 years old and I am still surprised by people.
Thanks to you.

The site is still with a hint of humor, so I will continue to crack up with anecdotes:

There are seven dwarfs sitting in the church and discussing something all the time. Finally, a gnomicus asks the priest:
– Holy Father, do you have any monks in your church?
No no no no.
The gnomes are discussing something even louder. interfering with the priest. Gnomicus asks again:
Are there monks in other churches in our city?
and no. Stop the noise there and listen to the sermon.
The gnomes make even more noise. The same gnome asks again:
Are there any monks in any church in the country?
The exiled priest says:
and no. There are no monks-lipputs at all. Finally, stay away from me and do not interfere with the service.
The gnomic who asked, with a sad sight, goes to the exit, and all the other gnomes march after him, friendly scandering: THE PINGVIN TRACKED, THE PINGVIN TRACKED, THE PINGVIN TRACKED!!! to

The hero Bodrov brings through the film the struggle for truth and such values as revenue, nobility and humanity.
– is
The key word is revenue.and :)

Hero Bodrov brings through the film bitter truths about Russian fatalism and imperial syndrome, about Russian hopelessness and hopelessness, about the naked Russian soul, which is always ready to go into all the hardship, especially in periods of such timelessness as the nineties. And the fact that he covers this desperate longing for the meaning of life with pathetic words about the “power in truth,” only better emphasizes the image of the “hard” and “just” idiot with a cannon ahead, who is “the judge of himself” and decides everything with the help of a trunk. Didn’t you have this feeling of powerless compassion, grief and bitter love for Russia?

This is a brilliant film, and you are exposing it to some kind of Hollywood "fight of good with evil".

Here, my American husband and I have been living together for a year, we are going to Russia to visit our parents, and the only phrase he remembered in Russian is: "Cats, cats - mandavoks!"

Uncomfortable answers.

Yes, I remember, once my mom also cleansed the brains for a long time after a joint trip to the cloth shop, when to me, a fourteen-year-old, quietly choosing the material for her shirt, shouting: "Immediately leave, don't dare touch anything here with your dirty hands" - a strange aunt was attached.
In my youth I often became the object of unmotivated aggression by much older inadequate people. As a child raised, she usually silently tried to move away somewhere, but here it became so offensive - what dirt could be in such an adult lady?
I asked her:
Why do you think my hands are dirty?
Why are you still bite up? Let me be your mother...
Well, here she stood herself, and I replied:
If you were my mother, I would have hanged myself.
And at that moment, hearing a suspicious noise where her child should be, my mother approached.
No references to Shurik from "Ivan Vasilyevich" did not help me

At one time, we had a very sound philosopher in every sense of the word. One of the lectures included the topic of parents, how to influence their child more correctly and better and which methods are more effective.

The philosopher asks us all: Who thinks he had cruel parents? One guy raises his hand.

Why is?

"I grew up in the village, my father saw me smoke and locked me in the basement for 3 days, only food brought.

Are you smoking now?

and no.

This is not cruel, but far-reaching.

My father once surprised me. I was ten years old, my father and I went to visit my mother, she was on a business trip to Siberia at the time for a couple of months. And the father's night before leaving the first day of vacation, how not to mark? Sitting on the train, he says, to the lark for the mineral, I looked like and disappeared like the beauty of former classmates. The train touched. I was driving for almost three days. I met my mother and was out of her, almost before the divorce.

It turned out that the father did not share the last cold mineral and fought with some man. Both went to the CPS! I have not even smoked!!! to



Everything was told as it was, there was no reason to not believe the philosopher.

My wife is asleep and I am sitting at the computer, I hear...

It begins to gain turns and snoring grows into a light snoring. I am delighted and amused, I sit further at the computer, work hard, then she starts to press hard on jazz and the female snorkeling goes into a male baryton, I have a little hectic))) She wakes up from her own snorkeling, looks at me (I hold my last strength not to rub) as she gives me " such a pleasant dream dreamed like I plant a plane".

Well, how propellers work I’ve heard so)))

Jackie breaks into the room. Exiled.Because he sits, looks at me and nods again!
I went to the toilet and had food. I stand up and run!! to
Julia: She doesn’t bite. She is talking to you.)
I don’t understand cats.
Julia: Very bad
Denis: Well yes. So many years with cats and I don’t understand.
Suddenly she wanted to tell you something very interesting.
Dennis: Well I guess what: run to the bathroom, see how I can jump in it!

Trapped in traffic jams on the way to work, I write a text message to the boss: "Hello, ass with traffic jams, I am late." He replied, “Hello, my ass with traffic jams.”

My 5 year old daughter learns the word “pizzer” and uses it correctly. I explain that this is a bad word. That if adults, I or my mom, accidentally say it - it's very bad. And if a little girl says it, it is very, very, very bad.

I understood? I ask.

I understood.

What did you understand? and repeat.

If you or your mom say this word, it’s very bad.

If I am, it is shit.

Dialogue with Swami:

and Pen

You are penny.

You are a pen.

The Pen

It was about building foam to close the window.

The case was in the third class. We were asked to write in Russian. Usually, the teacher reads the text of the presentation twice, and then you need to write, but that time it was not so. The teacher said that everyone can read the text as many times as they want, but then, when you close, you can’t look into the textbook.

Confident that this will be the easiest statement in my life, I read the text 10 times and started to write. It was a volume of less than half a page, so I, already then having an excellent memory, could not help but learn it in 10 readings. So I was absolutely sure of success.

In the middle of the class, the teacher fell asleep leaving the class. I have no idea why, but when she went out, she said that she could not write, and if someone would, she would find out. Of course, I had no need to write, and in any case at the time I was so obedient that I could not even think of it.

What was my surprise when I got my job, in which there was no correction, but at the same time it was 4 points. In complete confusion, I approached the teacher who was talking with the teacher of physical education and asked why. The teacher, addressing the physician, said: “What an unconscious one! She wrote everything word by word, and she wants five more!”

I still tremble a bit of anger when I remember.

gray_bird: Studying the three-phase silhouette on the stands without protection is the most exciting thing, almost in every lab someone started the stand... and :)
Tagged with: to smell? We exploded so that a pillar of flames to the ceiling and the ceiling was wrapped. Three-phase CC at 380 volts. He did not even lead his ear. He got rid of reading the magazine, looked at us like a fool... and said only – broke – clean up. And they did. Changed all the burnt electronics, cleaned the stand from the fire...
alex_avr2: Chelyabinsk to Chelyabinsk It is :)
Tagged with: UGU Yuri is electric. Labs about it.

HGH: By the way, medical - fu, ugliness (

Yyy: Why do you think so?

Xxx: He has a taste... as if he had eaten a dentist

Yyy: You just don’t know how to cook them (c) :)

I have eaten all my teeth.

XXX is:

The moderators deleted the post without explanation.
For the mates.
Fuck with him.

The Office. A naturally full-fledged aunt, intentionally outrages the manager’s boy ignoring her attempts to get him into her job.
and yes! The men today!
Without getting rid of his affairs,
The man broke, but the grandmothers grew fat.

I work in technical support of one game in social networks. The player sent a message on his, in the username, we try to figure out what the matter is.

Do you understand what he is talking about?
I: I was not very concerned. About what?
Tester: I didn’t understand, so I ask.
I: Well, it doesn’t seem like he’s working there. I so understood.
Tester: I understand it.
I: Did I understand it correctly?
I don’t know, I didn’t understand how you understood. I understood how he understood.
I: Aaaah, I understand it all.
Game Designer, half-voiced: Drug addicts, fuck. I didn’t understand the fucking.

A philosopher today tested his coronary focus with apples: put a pair on the table and asked: why are people all different and apples are the same?

Oh yeah, I came out like this, I think: I’m going to show him a whiplash here, there’s a point... I’m going out, and they’re actually the same! One size, equally green, polished, waxed...

I thought, and got my one and a half times bigger, red, filled, immediately visible - tasty! And I say, well, glamorous blondes are all the same!

As a child, I was absolutely sure that the laundry room is a place where dishes are washed, i.e. a dishwasher. And when my mom threatened me to throw all my toys into the laundry, because of the mess in my room, I didn’t understand the meaning of this action and what was terrible about it. But I cried because I thought that was what my mom wanted me to do.

I remembered the story of how I drove in the first coupe of a placard wagon and at the time of the lack of network in the train created a roasted wifi network rzd wi-fi free, because the conductor did not want to give me a cup without tea. In general, I never turned it off until the whole car approached her about this waya.