bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №94492
 25.02.2014
The boss explained to the client today: “Well, it’s there, in prison! You don’t know the prison – not local, right?"

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №94491
 25.02.2014
During the discussion of the working process, a new concept was born - Panic Blowdown, which best describes the behavior of some comrades.)

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №94490
 25.02.2014
The Jew, right?by :

I walk with a rabbit (year and five months)

Such a sho? Have you been walking with Rebecca for so long?
Is that what he tells you?
Awesome to you!

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №94489
 25.02.2014
Judging by recent events in Ukraine, Russia is the only country in the world that pays for being sent.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №94488
 25.02.2014
<Nervniy> I call it I look like an idiot
<grifon> a provocative question)))))

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №94487
 25.02.2014

xxx: 16.10.11
with Birthday)

yyy: 16.10.11
thank you 😉

xxx: 16.10.12
with Birthday)

yyy: 17.10.12
What a busy letter...
In this case, thank you)

xxx: 16.10.13
Happy Birthday to you :)

yyy: 16.10.13
The trend continues)
thank you )

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №94486
 25.02.2014
Previously they were farmers, planting tomatoes and trousers. But one day, everything changed. Once, farmers realized that it was much more fun to burn all in a row from a machine gun than to dig potatoes. Thus began another world war. Yes, the reason was exactly this: If you don’t believe it – be sure of the 5strike!
Join us! Grow up the most evil team of the most evil soldiers, and show everyone the Mother of Kuzma in the new, stunned game 5Strike! by Facepalm

[yyy]: I thought at first that this was a description of Maidan

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №94485
 25.02.2014
X: No, I will not come to you. Lenny, the cursor, and all that.
Y: Well you know. And the cat, by the way, became affectionate, murmuring. Suitable, the legs are treated.
X: Wait for Sunday.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №94484
 25.02.2014
I pointed
=========
to this:
I loose 803g, take food and leave. The seller picks up the jaw, the line shakes with laughter."

Tell me, please, ALL Ukrainians say "put" instead of "put"?
Is this a new fashion, illiteracy, or is it really the rule of the Ukrainian language?! to
I want to find out...
= is
"тг", after the figures, as if it suggests that the Ukrainians are not very involved here

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №94483
 25.02.2014
Sidor: And I want to give a bracelet to a girl from the most expensive metal.
Which metal is the most expensive, eighty? Here is! I will give her an eighth bracelet.
chemister: Oh, that the girl was sick of his smell and a couple of days later she died in pain from osmium poisoning :(
The most expensive metal is California.
Chemister: You just need to give in parts, or the critical mass can be formed :)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №94482
 25.02.2014
With Habr, about the new technology of reading up to 1000 words per minute:
It is incredible! Words flash in front of the eyes, and only then the meaning appears in the head.
Only there 500 words maximum, can you try a thousand? How do I buy this thing?
I really am afraid that I would not read a novel like that. The brain is stressed
- Once blinked - a couple of pages past... Until it is with the sensor,
which fixes the blinking of the eyes, useless thing.
Half of Samsung’s eye sensors are out.
They really work through the ass, but what a potential!)
The eye sensor through the ass is a breakthrough!! to

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №94481
 25.02.2014
Yanukovych has been declared in international search. It is still unknown where it is located – in Ukraine or in Ukraine.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №94480
 25.02.2014
Gender shit on both sides!! to
Friends of Nedaalok-daalok-macho-zadrot-lesbians - NAH!!! to
Both sides of the Maidan!! to

Read funny quotes.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №94479
 25.02.2014
Only the one who recruited me can dismiss me from this job.
What is the obstetrician?

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №94478
 25.02.2014
In Ukraine appeared the parliamentary faction "Freedom".
What is the "Debt"?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №94477
 25.02.2014
Discussions of SCO. and Advertising:
Not to harm a man of good will? Can the rest mean?
YYY: It does not mean. When I say “Don’t eat shit” it doesn’t mean “eat anything except shit.” It just means, don’t eat badly.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №94476
 25.02.2014
A friend of Cole came to me today to talk about important topics. While I was talking about the same important but sad topics on the phone, Kohl's friend orphaned to the corner of the table, that is, sat down, stuck in the elbow - and that's all. I slept. With little thought, I wrote on a piece of paper with an evil size, and it will be so with everyone, I laid it on Kolya and made my face more whirly.

Within fifty minutes, Kohl’s friend served a disciplinary cause, disciplining by his appearance as much as two flight-bounters and one large-volume accountant =) (c) schreik

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №94475
 25.02.2014
ProstoKostya: Could this not be a joke?
Nislupko: There is no joke on the Internet

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №94474
 25.02.2014
There are far fewer people willing to die for an idea than they are willing to kill for it.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №94473
 25.02.2014
This story happened on a large metallurgical combination.
There in the brigade of auditors sent a young girl-practitioner.
And then, after another check of the warehouses, they asked this girl to enter all the data to the computer. She, of course, sat down to work, sat down for a long time and delivered the result by the end of the day.
It is good that someone from their brigade, before sending a report to the bosses, decided to run through his eyes. This someone and discovered that in the warehouses in large amounts there is such an item as the "worm dog". After long discussions, none of the colleagues-auditors was able to understand what this was.
Called the executor.
It turned out that she didn't like the wording "naked cable", and she wrote somewhat more tactically, and she wasn't even confused that this "dog" of different diameters was wrapped in drums and wooden drums.

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