bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №129759
 22.06.2016
UEFA proposed to leave the Russian national team normally, for disqualification, filling the mouths of the English, no use playing football...

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №129758
 22.06.2016
At the box, a man in front of me slowly puts out foods, including one nectarine. one one. The treasurer breaks through all the products, weighs the single fruit, calls the amount, the man pays, and, breaking the products in packs, handes nectarine to the seller. A bit upset:
Is it me?
The Man:
“No, instead of what I ate, let them take it to the place.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №129757
 22.06.2016
In Russia, a law has been passed that prohibits the symbolism of organizations cooperating with the Hitlerites during the Second World War.

Thus, Russia has banned its own state flag – the symbol of the Russian Liberation Army of General Vlasov.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №129756
 22.06.2016
There were no fruits and vegetables on the box, before me a aunt with an apple tree:
- Maybe you will pay for what you already have, and wait for the administrator with the apples? Should I try water (a couple of Coca-Cola bottles)?
They say, “They have seen such a ‘occulation’ in various kinds of people.”
Just because karma will spoil not only them, but you too.
I just came from the church.
I decided to take the phrase on arms and use it at meetings.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №129755
 22.06.2016
Hm, ladies and gentlemen. For the curiosity. When do you get to do three jobs?
I have a major on ATP and work in the office "horns and horns". From 08.00 to 22.00
Only sleeping time remains. There was an offer for the weekend, but I can forget how the child looks.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №129754
 22.06.2016
By the way, the question is, think of the leisure: but who is educating all these hardworking and foolish?

How who?
Of course the mothers!! to
Yes, my son, the time has come. So you approach that girl and the member trembles..."

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №129753
 22.06.2016
Residents of the Motovilikhin district of Perm paid attention to the fact that the river Iva flowing in the surroundings has colored in bright green. In social networks appeared photos and assumptions about the nature of this phenomenon.

Apparently at night some Permian plant poured chemical waste into the Iva river.

XXX Factory for the production of slurry. Any Futurama fan knows this.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №129752
 22.06.2016
This is the whole essence of any deception: to impose on the people of the first world the ideology of the second.
Who needs this fat, I would like to ask? Everyone lives in their own bay, and in our age you can easily move from the surrounding of females / males to the surrounding of people and personalities.

I don't know how you do in the country of people and personalities, and we in the usual small township have male / female and people with personalities to live in the same multi-storey houses, drive children to the same schools and often even work together. Because the levels of intelligence, professionalism and earnings are not related to the level of psychological development and the ability to see in people the personality.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №129751
 22.06.2016
Two discuss the salaries of deputies and officials and compare them with the salaries of other citizens.
- Yes, and doctors, compared to these, in the full paragraph...
and AGA. Surgeons no longer cut people for money, but simply. For the pleasure.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №129750
 22.06.2016
X is PPC. All the morning I sealed "Russian puzzling"
A: Do not correct

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №129749
 22.06.2016
Electricity in the area today.
I sit. A mother and her eight-year-old daughter sit in front of her. After a minute next to me, carefully wiping out all the surfaces, Mademoiselle sits down.
The child observes the whole picture with astonishment and at the end of the process says: "You left the anti-gas at home?"and "

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №129748
 21.06.2016
Man dreamed of a cat and a shepherd. He got two-in-one: a chihuahua of shepherd color, who can sleep, snoop and lick. What can a man be dissatisfied with?
Do you want each animal individually?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №129747
 21.06.2016
English courses, courses

Teacher: Do not use the word "must", "could" or "Would", because "must" is a very strong word, it obligates and compels to perform; do or die! It is used in harsh conditions.
It can be used in the army.
Or in the area.
Zzzz: And who else was there?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №129746
 21.06.2016
Approximately half of what you named belongs to the list of professions in which it is forbidden to take women because of harmful or dangerous working conditions.<> Read this list of the two-thousand-year edition - there are several hundred professions in which a man is not sorry.

Who is not sorry? Who does not regret men who bury their health at work?
I think that most women are unfortunate and most women are just rushing to stand up or take over their lives, so that the stumbling feeder even after the shift lay down.
And not a pity, I think, those whose salary is "up to the knee", vacation abroad, travel everywhere paid and instead of vacation "holidays". One such recently directly in the air laughed that, well, the 12-meter conu in the multi-storey are in demand among the population (((
And no, the problem is not that he is not a woman by gender.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №129745
 21.06.2016
Match Russia - Wales, in the frame of the Russian child-patient
The kids are sorry
XHH: They can’t leave anyone away.
Tag: after the match
HHH: And they can

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №129744
 21.06.2016
It is so hot that you don’t even want to turn on the solder.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №129743
 21.06.2016
The Corporate Chat:

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Eat bananas, they are in the kitchen!! to

yyy [10:05]
The reason?

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The right changed!! to

yyy [10:05]
Hurry to! We are old!

zzz [10:05]
And the bananas?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №129742
 21.06.2016
At the box, a man in front of me slowly puts out foods, including one nectarine. one one. The treasurer breaks through all the products, weighs the single fruit, calls the amount, the man pays, and, breaking the products in packs, handes nectarine to the seller. A little embarrassed, “Is it me?”

The man: “No, instead of what I ate, let them take it.”

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №129741
 21.06.2016
The provider appears to be cheating. The channel falls, I call the TP to argue, and there the robot with a joyful-self-satisfied tone moves:"Hello! Do you have internet? We have it!"
This is shit.

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №129740
 21.06.2016
I don’t understand one thing: why are men so outraged by the women’s struggle for their rights? Are women going to take away some rights from men, or are they going to hang some duties? In what way? Explain, guys, what you are so afraid of.

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