bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №91605
 25.12.2013
Q: Do you remember my brother?
ZZ: Which
Xh: Well, our marching, baidarotnik, all walked in the kayak
ZZ: Dick, you’ll forget this, of course I remember! What has he already stolen?
XH: Yes, it was strange, I can’t say otherwise xD
He is alone all his life, lives only with cats, and his cell phones have not yet been, well, he comes to the market, sweeps his head in the window and asks for the cheapest wireless garment.
ZZ: And what then?
Q: Well, and she asks him, and the mobile is what. Is he talking mobile? I don’t have a cell phone.)
Q: So how is it O_o??? Why is he for you. Leha answers, it is, when I walk on the street, I often talk to myself, so that people stop scratching, I thought, I call on my mobile phone)))))))
ZZ: GHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
XH: Well, what, I closed up and stuffed something there, I’m hz. Like a living

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №91604
 25.12.2013
About about:

Admin, turn off the filter. What a grind. The word d-e-b-a-t has become maternal.

-

This is a jerk, we in the game chat can not normally say that distracted to feed the r****ka (child), and the mob of Ice Monk runs runs with the funny name of Ice Mo***

[ + 38 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91603
 25.12.2013
The Real History of My Name

Parents: We need to come up with a name for our son. Let us call him Egor.
Grandma: It can’t be! He will then be irritated at school "Egor on the back of the bugs"!!! Let’s call him Anton.

So they called...

[ + 40 - ] [8 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91602
 25.12.2013
I’ll add my five copies to the boomerang.
Any bulldozer essentially lives this way because he is prevented from returning to the gathering. No one holds anyone in the city, he wanted - go to the village, there are full of abandoned houses, hands will not be superfluous, and drink something to eat. But yes, we have to work. No money for a ticket? The Rabbit. Do not accept? There is a lot of village. Do you know niche? Learn to Hole. But again, sleeping on other people's entrances and basements is easier and you don't have to break from a busy place. Of course, under old age is more difficult - but my great-grandmother lived and worked until the end of 91 years. So do not hide.
Don't be afraid to dislike them - they are really just lazy and pose a danger (like any alcoholic, but this is a slightly different problem). I really simplified everything, but piss. My cat is more important to me, and I am alone.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №91601
 25.12.2013
Buy a ginger root.
How does he look?
As a root. Children are like that. and beige. The lemon smells.
Which Mandragora?
and yes.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №91600
 25.12.2013
and Habr. Lighting in the snow

... and motion sensors will allow you to make a snowman whose eyes blink sharply in the dark.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №91599
 25.12.2013
We took a little cat, growing, fucking, body. He ate from his bowl, then took food from the old cat, then took breakfast from three members of the family in turn, then ate lunch, took a piece from the masters, then ate dinner to his own, took away the old cat, ate her dinner, hindered the masters from dinner, pulled out three plates, then bit the mouse (toys), attacked and stuck in the corner of the couch, chewed the curtains... He has no worms. It should have been called Alduin.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №91598
 25.12.2013
Mayrin
I like the elves in Iceland.

Daecumot
And they what

Mayrin
They are false.
and in the original article generally mimimi)

Mayrin
There the guy stated that some of course annoyed by all this joke with elves, and he himself is not quite sure that they exist, but on the other hand he and his wife married in a church, the God of which is invisible as well as the elves)

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №91597
 25.12.2013
From the discussion of the popularity of PlayStation among adults:
The nest of corruption: Everyone has their own level of development. In the evening I go to a fitness club or with my family to an amusement park or learn a foreign language.
by R!: Strange to hear this from a man with a nick "The nest of corruption" :D

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №91596
 25.12.2013
A colleague comes to work and asks:
There is a GIMP graphic editor. Is it paid or free, can I put it on a working computer? I do not want to violate the copyright law. Fake the signatures.

Then I realized that he froze, roasted, and left.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №91595
 25.12.2013
I work for Mr. Bush. The level of possession of the compound is high, it is called "uswer, which does not endure the mosquito admin".
I recently learned from the girls that I am a super mega programmer)) they saw that I travel on the Excel sheet without using the mouse, copy it, insert it, etc. and when I started the buttons on the toolbar to press holding alt and printed (ctrl + p) then were more generally in the affix.

This is what I thought. And if I tell you that some columns of the same type are filled with a machine, because I have prescribed conditions there, will they begin to worship me and drive virgins on Thursday?? to

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №91594
 24.12.2013
From the morning discussion...
- Well, what, - decided to make her an offer on the NHG or will you pay for an iPhone?
by Iphone

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №91593
 24.12.2013
What do you know about fraud? My brother, when I found out that I was sitting on asphalt-7, pulled the tablet, threw the bugs there, bought all the top cars and upgraded them to the maximum! I was uninterested to play! And when I instructed him in this, he stated that he saved me time and that is part of his direct responsibilities!

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №91592
 24.12.2013
Just in the morning in the garden, one dad shouted: “Yamanarot, I forgot the camera!” and ran into the car and brought a registrator.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №91591
 24.12.2013
Deputy Prime Minister Shuvalov explained the presence of money in offshores by not wanting that in the case of their wife's sudden death, the children inherited all the money. They, like, have to earn themselves. This is definitely Sparta.


[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №91590
 24.12.2013
From the Women’s Forum:

What is the most painless way to get rid of virginity?
What kind of method of bla bla...

[ + 52 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91589
 24.12.2013
Even when the shell stopped walking from the nagar in the canal of the shell and sent the cartridge to the cartridge, we hit the shell with our feet.
Kalashnikov thank you.
The eternal captain. Called by...Baby.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №91588
 24.12.2013
The thread on the broadcast "School of Evil", discusses literature, talks about Russian classics.
What is your relationship with Russian classics?
Cable is complicated.
A: What are these?
It’s unpleasant to look at yourself in the mirror, especially if it shows ugliness.
Q: Who is showing?
The mirror!
Q: I understand which writer shows you the most ugliness?
Sh: Well, because I am from St. Petersburg – Dostoevsky.
A: He generally shows ugliness to everyone who looks at it.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №91587
 24.12.2013
Youth is vodka, boat and bullshit.
Maturity is cinema, wine and domino.
old age - kefir, clisters and sortiers.
and :)
_______ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___

"and a warm variety"
Someday you will understand how this little clarification changes the matter...

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91586
 24.12.2013
to this:
— — —
Before I registered in Hanze, I walked quietly without a knife. After two years of reading, I carry a gun, 2 knives, GB, pharmacy box, NAS, diet, 2 lamps, spare battery to the phone. O_O
— — —
Camard, you are a maniac. I behave completely rationally.

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