bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №103114
 22.09.2014
Now in the chat, the comrade asked, “Are you conebal?”
Fuck, I actually thought for five minutes what it was for a word... There was a man chasing horses. It turned out to be easier: "cannibal". Oh my Moscow!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №103113
 22.09.2014
Is it possible to use the services of landscape designers?
Now, they say, everything is possible. Someone in the suburb of Moscow has a crocodile living in a pond 24 hours a day.

The rumors, as usual, ruin everything. This is aunt.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №103112
 22.09.2014
Anti-café in the city of N:

There was recently, the atmosphere is not bad, one "but" in a guy with a reception or manic-depressive psychosis, or he is an actor and rehearsing roles.
At our first visit, he enchanted everybody! 10 people in the company.
Moreover, I approached this individually: someone made claims (just claims!) about the calculation of large banknotes, he was rude because of the absence of records (although all were recorded), scratched if he could not hear the name, and then and then...
He did not argue with him, although the precipitation remained.
He came in again once in a week, now he hugged each of us at the entrance. Snooping like dear guests, again, without objective reasons.
I understand that everyone has their shortcomings, but it is more pleasant to deal with adequate people.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №103111
 22.09.2014
The first in the series of artistic discoveries of Alphonse Allé was a completely black and almost square canvas �The Battle of Negroes in the Cave in the Deep Night� (1882), originally displayed in a golden frame by his temporary companion and colleague, humorist writer, author of waterlists, Paul Bijo. Without stopping on the achieved success, a year later (at the second exhibition �The Binded Arts�), Allet exhibited a virgin white sheet of Bristol paper entitled �First Communion of Chlorothic-blind Girls in the Snow Age� (1883).[4]:p.XXI Another year later, the next painting by Alphonse Allé was perceived as a kind of �colour explosion. The rectangular landscape �Culture of tomato harvest on the shore of the Red Sea by apoplexic cardinals� represented a bright red one-color painting without the slightest signs of image (1884).

[ + 38 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №103110
 22.09.2014
One with his ex can talk on the phone, the other ex-prostitute chooses...
It was directed by Vadim Roger. He was not married once. Some of the names of the former are: Bridget Bardot, Katry Denev, Annette Stroyberg, Jane Fonda, etc.
But it is fake. Some ten times different actresses had in the form of wives.
And here Vadim Rogers managed to maintain such relationships with his ex that when
At the shooting of the film "Carousel" with Jane Fonda, Vadim fell and broke his arm, then seeing this was the former at the time Annette first rushed to him. Learned about the disaster, from the neighboring filming site Catherine Denev ran away. All together they (he, two former and present) sat in the “ambulance” to take Vadim to the hospital. And it was supposed to happen that Brigitte Bardot was passing by by a taxi. Having postponed her business, she immediately joined them.
All of his ex visited the hospital and not once. And it didn’t matter to the former that at the time, each of them had an official husband.
All his wives were at Vadim’s funeral.
And then someone is proud that they can take advice on the phone from a former prostitute of choice. and weak.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №103109
 22.09.2014
I have always been interested in four things:

1st What is worse, "the first fox in the area" or "the last fox in the area"?
2nd Which is more delicious, "really delicious candy" or "unreally delicious candy"?
Three What was "a long time in the library" or "a long time not in the library"?
4 is And why do we need a particle "no" if its presence does NOT solve anything?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №103108
 22.09.2014
Really what. They want to put Russia on their knees. Get tired of it. It must first be raised from the shoulder and turned, and then try to put it.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №103107
 21.09.2014
In the comments:
XXX: Too Yellow for this.
YYY: What are you kidding here?
XXX: Decreased

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №103106
 21.09.2014
Get rid of the gays! This is a boring shit! A dull and dull shit. He has already taken all the gay, all the tolerant to the gay, all the indifferent to the gay, but, fucking, somebody has nothing to do with it! You make fun shit. Let’s discuss a referendum in Scotland or a debunk or, maybe, shit, which funny quote will we discuss?

Joke: What is your name? Just like Serena. What kind of serpent? Like any sergeant.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №103105
 21.09.2014
Andrew, I won’t come today.
WOW: What is it?
I gave my brother a car.
What about his car?
Ohhh: yeah fuck... my mom confused us - we need to drop the berry at home, say, there are roots, nothing grows, bla bla bla bla bla... karoch, we walked around her and decided - we need to roll only along the road, otherwise the wire will break or the house will collapse. They pushed it halfway from where to fall, and then this genius came to his mind with the idea - to tie the rope to the breeze higher, and the second end to the barrel and stretch slightly to give the desired direction of the fall. It is said – done! Bratello proudly sits behind the wheel of his two-toned crocodile, and I continue to fuel the breeze with the strap. I scream – strain a little! Well he tightened - and there was a loud noise!
Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah!! to
All would be nothing, only the rope was shorter than the breeze... the evacuation officers were halved when they loaded the remains of the car...
I am so happy 😉))))))))))))))))))))

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №103104
 21.09.2014
xxx: Tell me a couple of sins, or I am an atheist
YYY: I advise you to try it.
YYY: All seven mortals are miraculously good.
XXX: Oooo... it’s good...
The Seven Deadly: What Is That?
YYY: This is the concept of European churches
What to try in life

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №103103
 21.09.2014
Children, this is Parmenid.
Who is famous?
Ancient Greek thinker.
Lovers of young boys.
He was Zenon's teacher.
of the books of Plato,
denied the existence.
He is a pedicure, hoo-oo!
Who has said it now? Who is this glorious natural?
Those who graduate from school,
In the fast,
Stir in the macdake cola.
Without a plus plus,
Will it be in a few years?
The Parmenid? Yes if B! No is!
The apartment in a mortgage
Buy, and credit for Ford Focus?
Drunk at the disco.
Will he get to the globe?
Whoever takes a fat woman,
The beer stomach.
As a result of such,
Going to PgM,
Flying to Thailand for vacation
Their past problems?
Who will die after 40 years
a heart attack or cancer,
Who will soon forget.
Or even his dog?
Carl Ivanovich is me.
by Clavo! Go out, the pig!
And yes, I am not a homicide. But all kinds of "blasters", who cannot arrange their own lives, but know exactly how others should live, have already gotten order.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №103102
 21.09.2014
Well, how to explain the rule "it" and "it" to a person who writes "what to do" in full seriousness?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №103101
 21.09.2014
"A turned out to be a timidling game."

The most accurate and accurate error!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №103100
 21.09.2014
We started to forget the guy with the dollars.

I suspect he went to his relatives in Donetsk in the spring.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №103099
 21.09.2014
>>But England and Britain are generally on different continents.
They are still neighboring with two other states, the Netherlands and the Netherlands.

and UGU. I was told here by seven-class students that Ireland is on the island of Iceland, Edinburgh is the capital of London, and in general English is different from the Sesshan language.

All in one lesson. How I was taken by ambulance, I don’t know.

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №103098
 21.09.2014
A bit of biology:
____
Milk like the Chinese do not eat at all (I may be mistaken).
They drink milk little and rarely, but not because they don’t love or fear. As a Chinese man once told me, there are only three dairy producers in China, and this is due to the fact that there is no place for pastures. He himself, by the way, has been traveling through the CIS countries for many years, and he really likes the clean (compared to northern China) air and milk, which he drinks in large quantities.
____

Milk is biologically a baby product, not intended for consumption by adult individuals of the species (because the toddlers will then not be able to compete with them and die). In humans, this "unintendedness" is expressed in the intolerance of milk sugar - lactose. With age, the level of lactase normally drops, lactose begins to reach the large intestine, where it is incorrectly and hardly absorbed by bacteria, which leads to dysbiosis and diarrhea. However, in some predecessors of mankind, this function was broken and lactose-tolerant individuals appeared. Among the Russians such mutants are 80-85%, among the Finns - up to 99% (Scandinavia is called the milk center of the world), and among the Chinese and Africans their number sometimes does not exceed 2-5%.

So, to simplify, milk in China is not drunk because of the lack of pastures, but because for more than 90% of the Chinese it is poison. Your companion is lucky :)

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №103097
 21.09.2014
I add :

Was Turing not tried or subjected to hormonal castration? In what do you see more freedom, smart man, in the choice given to him between prison and castration?
The desire of homosexuals to associate a high level of intelligence with the desire to get in the ass is not very new. As a result, every nearby pedestrian immediately concludes that his sexual aspirations automatically raise his level of intelligence. You seem to have avoided that too, and I congratulate you.

= the =
I add :
A good half of the great people were subjected to some sins (drug addiction, alcoholism, paranoia... homosexuality). Some were also schizophrenic. But this only means that we are all human and nobody is perfect. And it is not that being a drug addict / alcache / psychic / peder is normal / good. When you say that Turing was gay, you can still tolerate him – he was a great man. But the peder who covers his name is just a peder.
___________________________________

The crowd greedfully reads confessions, notes, etc., because in its wickedness they rejoice in the humiliation of the high, in the weaknesses of the mighty. When she discovers every ugliness, she is in admiration. He’s small like us, he’s ugly like us! Lie, fools: he is small and ugly — not like you — otherwise..."
A.S. Pushkin P.A. Vyazemsky November 1825

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №103096
 21.09.2014
to this:

In the West, there are "carousels" and no throws, right? And CNN is a deeply true handshake television company.
It became known from the press, at this referendum itself:
1st The vote was not secret, and for each of its participants you can find out exactly how he voted.
2nd To get a ballot, it is enough for a person to simply name his name - he did not register anywhere.
Three Any resident of Scotland, including a foreigner from the EU and the Commonwealth, could vote.
4 is You can vote by mail, as well as transferring the right to vote to loved ones. A huge number of people voted - almost 800 thousand. of 4.2 million participants.
5 is All photos and videos on the site are prohibited.
6 is No exit polls were held, because the publication of their results on the day of the vote was also prohibited.
7 is The age limit was reduced to 16 years.
Yes to! I forgot! Even immigrants could vote!! to

-----------
Vasily Ivanovich and Petka went on a trip abroad. Separated
on different sides. They meet in three months. Vasily Ivanovich
hungry, encouraged, and the Petka is all in gold.
Where I took it.
P - I go to the club, and there the cards are played in a point. At first, the map did not work.
And then one says, “I have a point,” and I show him a point, and he
"Gentlemen believe in the word"
And here I have a map like a pearl...

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №103095
 21.09.2014
It is a T-shirt! Mom gave) from Sweden, I came back, she remembered that she has a son and in attempts on the move, at the airport bought a T-shirt. Give with such joy and the story that they have this wealth, all the business. When I asked why they were fucking, she turned red and tried to pick up, but she didn’t notice.
Alexey: And half a year before that, she brought me a cottage where in English it was written “I want a member like my pet.” Naturally, she didn’t know about it until she stumbled.

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