bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №113872
 24.05.2015
"Children, now you are October and we will divide the whole class into five stars. In each star there will be a commander – it is the head of the star. His two assistants are the stars’ hands. The two stars are the stars. understandably? Do you have a question, Wolf?
There are six stars in our group. Who will I be?
The teacher thought, she turned red, and the Wolf has acquired a life-long offensive nickname.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №113871
 24.05.2015
I have only been in the hospital for a week, and I have already got a package with bags.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №113870
 24.05.2015
D: Yes, call me a man!
Q: Okay, how can I help you?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
In one book (I do not remember the author, so as not to lie) there was a man with a strange name Peter.
Everyone somehow got used to it. Then I asked him why he was called so.
His parents came to register and asked them:
How would you call the boy?
and Peter.
Peter was recorded.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
You laugh, and I have a real story. When her mother's parents registered, they also asked how their daughter would be called. They answered Natasha.
Said is done. My mother didn’t get her passport so far and passed through all the documents like Natasha. Natasha Sergeevna

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113869
 24.05.2015
with listening.

Melnikov - especially a fierce boss, at lectures and seminars jokes, and at the exam laughs at them.
The solo does not pass, or all the glasses will have to go into the matan.
It is desirable to pass in paths, one at the exam, the other on the phone, build on secrecy, pump intelligence, luck, dexterity, secrecy. Ckylls "I went", "Put the three" on it does not work.
On the baff"Telephone with the internet"he has a powerful debaff"He burned the stove"when working he throws out of the dungeon.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №113868
 24.05.2015
I have been reading correspondence with a former bandmate since 2012. The phrase that reflected my entire learning process in the dialogues: “I won’t go to physics without you, I don’t even know what it looks like.” I have everything.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №113867
 24.05.2015
From the forum on laser vision correction.

Crazydoc: After I was operated myself (about 13 years ago), I asked the surgeon about the restrictions. He looked up at the sky, thought about it and said, “You can’t drink vodka. At night." I wondered why? He looked up at the sky again, pulled a cigarette and added, “Why does it seem so to me?”

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №113866
 24.05.2015
When I find out about the second place of Russia in Eurovision, it seems that it was conceived:
We can win, but we don’t need to do this shit on our territory.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №113865
 24.05.2015
From the broadcast of Eurovision:

Thank you to Sweden for winning.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №113864
 24.05.2015
As a result of the printing in the word "wizard" was born a suitable name for programmers - codun

[ + 23 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №113863
 24.05.2015
I am here "unexpectedly" the idea came, and why we cook ice cream exclusively in the winter, on NH. I cooked it in the summer, yesterday came out of the garden, got it out of the refrigerator, it is a delight, and delicious, and satiated, and cold.
The meat ice cream.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113862
 24.05.2015
My mother told me about her ancestors this morning.
My grandmother was a nobleman. She was not especially trained to work at home. And her grandmother from the pops was and taught: wool things (and in general all that can burn from the straw) to turn out and so smooth.
...And here is my grandfather Lieutenant in service, 37th year...Shields in shape IN!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №113861
 24.05.2015
I had in the first sex was unfettered, and the skill was perfectly replaced by fantasy. My partner never believed that I had the first one. And if a woman needs to be treated for three years "to be treated", then she needs to be treated, in general. Find yourself the same semi-frigid, of the category of'sex only for childbirth', and don't go to guys who want to fuck.
*** by
How can you not go? We will climb, we will climb, we will catch up on the streets, we will crash on you, we will always do that!
And the fairy tale about "I can't believe you are so skilled" has been heard by every virgin who didn't even get in the pants before the beginning of the act.
Do not confuse spermatoxicity with decay.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №113860
 24.05.2015
A specific porn video in contact: three girls are put on a cyst, then bound with trapped legs. enters uncle, begins to spit them. The girls whisper. Finally, the uncle puts some edible ointment between the girls’ legs and leaves, closing the door. A whisper is heard from the room.

Commentary :
Good tamada and competitions interesting

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113859
 24.05.2015
My husband was reading here, came seriously to talk about the fact that I have been crawling in bed lately.
I promised to resolve this issue as soon as I got rid of the gips.
We are the perfect family!

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №113858
 24.05.2015
Otherwise, how can I explain that the man who has been sleeping with me for almost a year still wants to forget about my request or lies that I washed, washed honestly?
__________
Well, we would dress him and his love bed once, and half a room in general. It is a natural reaction (as opposed to his behavior). Ordinary men in front of this matter are completely washed up.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №113857
 24.05.2015
Ah! Beautiful and young girl, Bust is a strong four, thin waist, and when she stands up, goes to the closet and bends behind the folder with documents, my spirit captures. Although by age and by position I have long been out of great sex, but what to see is nice!!! And here she sits somehow sad, sinking, asking, how and what. Her boyfriend said that she is fat and she needs to lose weight, and she can’t...And how much can she?As long as incredibly seductive girls will think of themselves as obnoxious...

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113856
 24.05.2015
The Cat Theorem:
- If you take a cat lying on the bed in your hands and immediately put it back, your laying option is always uncomfortable.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113855
 24.05.2015
The boy went to the doctor, the girl is interested in the results.

What did the doctor say?
He said he had problems with the muscles of his back.
Do you have muscles?? to
It’s like you have breasts.
The Fucks.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №113854
 24.05.2015
Walking past our kitchen in the office, I heard this dialogue about my person:
He is a lazer, not an admin. A selfie cannot be a professional.
Do you wear that? He’s not a professional, but he’s definitely a drug. I saw him shave his nails.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №113853
 24.05.2015
...
But the mosquito is not only a whirling shit, but also a very useful moth.
My fishing is paid with blood.

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