In fact, the most peaceful are those
Who really has to go to attack?

I worked in the glorious city of Tel Aviv in the early 1990s. I was late a couple of times, and the boss solemnly handed me the keys from the office. I had to come half an hour earlier, remove the office from the alarm, and leave half an hour later. Thank God, about a year later, another employee was late a couple of times, and the keys were handed over to her. No material cares or morals.

A dog can learn up to 250 words and count up to five. This is equivalent to 3 years of human age.
Cat: Put the wanted on your teaching, words and numbers. That’s the equivalent of 43 years of human age.

xxx: I was sitting in a computer club, playing, and a company of doctors, a four person, was sitting next to me. And suddenly one of them had a mouth foam, convulsions...

I had been frightened to want to help, but his partners just shouted in the chat "pause, Demon again AFK." They held him while shaking, then gave him water and pushed him on to play.

To say I was in shock was to say nothing.



YYY: A great team

We have lunch. The husband:

“Darling, do you have your hand in the bowl, get me this tomato?”

I get without problems. I ask :

Do you not pass through?

It goes through, of course, I just have my hand swallowed.

All cultures are different from each other. It was international.

One farmer connected feeders for animals and birds via the Internet and now anyone from anywhere on the planet can feed them.

But pressing the button is worth money, donate any amount and press the button once a portion of food for a horse or a donkey or cow, sheep, goat, pavilion... fish in a pond, feeders for wild birds.

During the year, the farmer collected more than a million dollars in donations.

It turned out that the rich and lonely found in the feeding of animals through the Internet a breath for themselves and colored their lives, looking at "their" fed pets and pets.

The farmer says he has a lot of free time and a lot of money.

– Yakov Semenovich, when you were in Paris, did you go to the bordell?
of course.
What about the Eiffel Tower?
There are no such.
So how is it?
She will stand for a long time.

It is necessary to ruin the present so that people would want to live in the future as in the past.

We have already achieved significant successes in the difficult work of silencing failures.

I am an illustrator of children’s books. I draw accordingly: big good eyes, naive smile, cartoon style and so on. It’s angry when they say, “You’re an artist, you need to paint something serious!”
Recently he illustrated the Red Hat. Painted as seriously as possible the scene with the opening of the belly of the wolf. I sent it to everyone who said my work was too childish. No longer touched.

You never understood me!
Will you be a whisky?
Maybe I was wrong with you.

Can’t lose weight by summer? Maybe you will recover by winter.

The “broken phone.”
We needed signs on the door with the inscription "Cassa". I go to the administrator.
- Order, plz, in the ACHO tables.
And what size?
I take the A4 sheet, bend it in half, show it.
and here. Half of A4. Everything is understandable?
Everything is understandable.
They bring in a week. Monster size 40 to 60 cm.
Are you really? – I ask.
What this? What I ordered, I brought.
What kind of thing did it look like, nothing suspicious?
and no. Our job is not to think, but to do.
I find out the path that led to this result.
According to the results, the administrator transferred the change and wrote "half A4".
The second administrator wrote in the ACHO "A4 half".
The A4 was divided into 2 and the A2 was received.
I ordered it as A2.

Then I read Murphy’s Laws.

The SMS:
I tried to transfer you 1000 rubles, but I failed. Try me, maybe you can do it?

With me on a term in one squadron served a couple: Pouh and Nebiok. They were called no different than "Phuy and not fucking" and put together on any work or costume. There was also a companion by the name of Razebayev, which, of course, everyone pronounced through a firm sign (the justice of which he proved by a personal example throughout his term of service). Well, at work, I met a man by the name of Corroeid. Ironically, he was the head of the materials quality department at a woodworking plant.

I have a best friend. A fun girl, but she doesn't like to understand anything thoroughly. Knowledge is superficial, for which I often heard detailed explanations of certain phenomena.

And some time ago, six and a half years ago, we talked to her and I complained to her about my loneliness. And then she, knocking herself on her forehead, cries out:

“I know who you need! You perfectly fit with each other! You are both so boring!*”

In a few weeks she will introduce me to her good friend, and what do you think? With this beautiful, smart, knowing almost everything, we have been together for six years, and we really perfectly fit each other.

There is a water park at TRC Peterland and there is a pit with a depth of probably 5-6 meters for freedives and aqualangists. And here I was a beginner "freediver", several times calmly reached the bottom, but I couldn't lie on the bottom - the volume of the lungs pushed out. Having done hyperventilation on top, dive and while immersed specifically devastated the lungs completely, going to the bottom with a toporic. Lieing on the bottom of this pool for 20 seconds, he looked at the floating legs of the floaters from above and decided to pop up. But then the difficulty arose... I floated out of the feelings of those 4 meters of eternity. There was no panic, but it was very difficult. The oxygen burned from powerful movements - instantly. A little more and I would start swallowing water from spasms.

Now I write and my hands sweat from memories.

I go to the Gazelle route. Next to me is a young man with a little son (4 years old). In front of him are three young girls in full attributes - sweat STRONG above the knee. The girls are fun talking. Suddenly the little boy pushes a serious face to his father’s ear and whispers very loudly, pointing his finger to the girls:

Daddy and Daddy! See also! The trousers!

Immediately the red-haired boy whispered to his son in response:

Closer and quieter! I see!

It was long ago. My brother and I came home from school and called my mother. We found out that the chicken in the oven for lunch was baked. I opened the oven and there was a chicken. But strangely pale, in some crumbs (sugares turned out to be), a carrot runs out of the puddle. They got (first chicken from the oven, then carrots from chicken). The chicken hardly cuts or chews.

My mom came in the evening and was terrified. It turned out that my father was running home before us, who was drunk. I ran for breakfast. And here - chicken in the oven, you can paint before the roots. This chicken in the bag, the other from the freezer! ), crushing in sweaters and pushing for beauty her in a juppy carrots - in the oven. For 20 minutes, because I had to run, or they’ll all drink.

How many years have passed, we still remember.