Many husbands would like their wives to look like stars of silent movies.

Explanation of a courageous man

I, FIO, moved __.__.2013 to the Red Army side on the Gilera Fuoco 500 scooter. I did not violate the rules and watched the road.
At the intersection with Berounskaya Street, unexpectedly for me and the other participants of the DTM, a black Hummer went to the red light without a properly installed state meter. I, landing a danger and avoiding an accident, was forced to go to the lane of opposite traffic in braking, where I stopped on the side.
During the braking, maneuvering and stopping he heard a strong blow from behind. I turned around and saw that a/m Hummer hit the next one with me in one direction a/m Suzuki Jimny state meter ______, virtually removing him cap space. Seeing behind the driver of the injured Suzuki Jimny girl, I went to give her possible first aid.
As I approached the car, I noticed a child in a child seat in the rear seat. I opened the luggage compartment of the affected car, through it got a child (a boy of about 4 years old), took the same emergency stop sign, installed it and through the driver’s door window helped the girl driver to get out.

Having taken her and the child to the side and making sure they were not seriously injured, I asked the driver of the Mitsubishi Airtrek, who also stopped to help, to call an ambulance and GIA. I then approached a/m Hummer solely to see if his driver needed my help. In the open window of this a/m I saw two persons coming clearly from the southern regions. This was attested by dark skin, chicken hard hair and characteristic features of the face.
I suggested that there were lost Spanish tourists in front of me and asked friendlyly in their native language, did they not notice the red color of the lighting — Al huele pido rosa? (I studied Spanish at the school at the USSR Embassy in Madrid, where my father worked as a driver.)
In response, the Hummer driver hit me through the open window of his car with his left hand in the area of his head. Since the helmet in which I was obliged to ride on the PDD I did not remove at this moment, the blow fell on it. This is what I explain the broken four fingers on his left hand. Then he jumped out of the car and also hit the head area with his right hand. This is how I can explain her fracture in the area of the radial bone.
The passenger, who then jumped out of the same car, struck me with some heavy object on the back, I did not enter the fighting with him, but simply carefully laid on the asphalt and as a law-obedient citizen began to wait for the arrival of the GAI. He did not hurt me, because under the jacket I was dressed in a motorcycle, more commonly known as a turtle. His broken nose and broken jaw can be explained by the fact that the safety pillows at the time of the impact a/m Hummer on a/m Suzuki Jimny did not work and he injured the front panel of the car.
About the broken-out official certificate of the Deputy Assistant of the Mahakkalin Council of Deputies in the name of... FIO...., I cannot tell you anything, because I am not aware of it. I also don’t know how the broken passport could be in the mouth and esophagus of a Hummer driver.
I cannot report anything about the group of citizens on motorcycles and scooters that gathered around the scene of the accident, because I absolutely do not know these people.
Also, I know absolutely nothing about who cut all the wheels of Hummer, who broke its roof with a break, who broke all the glasses and cut the leather salon, thereby making it useless, and with the already mentioned break turned the damaged cap and damaged the engine.
The truthfulness of my words can be confirmed by witnesses and participants in the accident, such as drivers of a/m Mitsubishi Airtrek state meter__ and a/m Suzuki Jimny.
Date of ____.2013 Signed by___________________

Directed by: Andrey L. Chuchkov

There were no Russian frogs.
Here is you, Depardieu.

I would love to wear a beard or a beard, but my hair is soft, and I'm like her I'll be on the offshoot after chemotherapy :(

Discussion of the news about the elastic material “Quantum Stealth” (“Quantum Hiddenness”), which acts as an invisible mantle.

xxx: Tell me bluntly about the astute refraction of the light, which gives the opportunity to show from the outside of this thing what is behind it yet and not including the person, I listen very carefully.
YYY: The words xxx, in my opinion, should be inserted into all fantastic films.
The arrows fly, the tails, for example, the bearded witches throw lightning, and here Nikita appears: "Tell me a bit about the clever energy streams that give the opportunity to let lightning out of my hands, I listen very carefully."
Or something like, “Tell me a shit about a clever cannon that makes it possible to blow up planets so that the thunder of an explosion on a distant spacecraft can be heard, I listen very carefully.”

Client contacted Skype:
The "Hello I need a website. Before sending those tasks, we will determine the initial conditions. I have a lot of experience interacting with programmers and I know how many of them are fools, I know all the problems of the organizational plan that I have to face. Here are my terms - I will only talk to a programmer who will make the site (the director of the company go here) the programmer should only deal with my site and nothing more, no jobs, no wives, no fitness, but only my site. (I have to be in contact for at least 12 hours a day) I have a dish ready. I must have the telephones of the programmer and two other friends in case I can’t call the programmer. If you do everything clearly and on time - I will give a premium, if you do not agree on time we will reduce the fee. And no advance payment. The budget? I know the price very well."

XXX: YYY, how are you?
YYY: XXXX is great. I am so lazy to go home that I sit at work. I also live alone. And then the director said to me, “Alina, did you make an inventory? No is! And why? I can’t have sex with men, but I can have sex with you. Tomorrow is your last day!
...That’s what I’m thinking...Do inventory or not do it? :D

XX: and last year, when the card changed, came to the department. She asks me - you will take money out of the card - I do. She takes it and immediately cuts it off with me. In a moment I said, oh...

Advice to the questioner:
xxx: Fuck, here's how to explain to your jealous girlfriend that he passed the link "Megan Fox will make a company of ninja turtles" not because of Megan Fox...

He sent it in direct text. That you yourself in two years did not complain that your wife got you and all the grandmothers are mercantile fools. Try to be smart yourself at least once and do an adult act. This is called counting ahead and looking into the future.

I fought with a friend yesterday. I make her computer, she complains about life. All the men of KAZLA, they all need only a beautiful body, but no one looks at the mind and soul.
I take yes and tell you, what do you have in your room with the posters of Pattinson, not of Hawking or Perelman? And wallpapers on the desktop - also what kind of podcast... in the sense, metrosexual?
Well here. She asked who Hawking and Perelman were. I stumbled. I was offended.

>>>"It is necessary, as in America, to put the receipts under the car park to everyone who has parked the car incorrectly."

This situation occurs:
Parked incorrectly, got out of the car and drove a sheet under the yard (an old receipt or a similar paper printed in advance at home). The inspector goes and sees that there is already a sheet - a new (second) will no longer hang (you can not punish twice for the same thing). To check on the basis of all the cars with sheets (he hanged himself or still someone from the inspectors) - long, and given the annual increase in the number of cars - it is impossible to check all. According to the zonal principle (one inspector is attached to the territory and only he can pay the fines here) it will also not work - you will not mention them all, and on your records / bases also not enough to check the time of the worker (especially because the machines come and leave).
Well, the man (the driver) will attach himself under the court "the penalty sheet", while in fact not receiving a single penalty.
This "American system" will simply not work in our country...

"Police investigates the disappearance of 300 million rubles from the account of Alexander Kerzhakov" 15.03.2013
According to the police, there is no crime. Alexander just missed when putting money on the account" 16.03.2013

The question:
Imagine you are inviting the Snowmen to a walk on a sunny summer day. What would you say to her?"

The answer:
I’m sorry, Snowmen, I know you’re growing up in the sun, but I need these five books so much.

That would be Friday every day!
YYY: You are an idiot?

A physicist studying atoms is just a bunch of atoms trying to realize themselves.
“Em, of course, I’m not very strong in biology, but are humans not made up of cells?
Biologists are made up of cells and physicists are made up of atoms. God, what are they teaching in school?

There is such an anecdote. On the eve of the wedding, the bridegroom goes out to the guests and announces: "There will be no wedding." The girlfriend was raped" The guests are in shock and start to break up. Here the father of the bride appears and reassures: "It's okay, the wedding will be, we've all done - the fool apologized."

It seems that all the loud corruption cases in our country can end with this phrase.

X: How many torches we have in the ECB? I have an office in a building where there is a company selling cannabis. Lamps, boxes, fertilizers, ventilation and even scents to mask the smell. These guys are smoked (all very easily defined by the appearance) They crack around the building, looking for shit...I passed past this office, there the door was opened...so they do not hesitate to ask how much type matures, when to feed, etc. They go in real crowds.
Y: How much does it mature?
Q: The most important thing is forgotten. The address!

from ZH:
After NG corporation slept with the head of not my department..now I want to sleep with my boss and look at our geodesist.Can this be considered a problem?

First comment: Come to Me, I am the Director

The evening. Four men in the apartment. We sit and play Ninja Turtles.
A friend distracted from the game asks.

Do you know any other games for two?
Could there be sex?
It’s a cool game, but just now the company isn’t very

Vitaly Milonov: Stephen Fry has a very poor vocabulary.
All our conversation he only repeated: "Are you serious?"".

Stephen Fry has a very poor vocabulary.

Stephen Fry has a very poor vocabulary.

with Stephen Fry.
very very.
The Poor.
The dictionary.
the stock.