bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №117312
 14.08.2015
I came back yesterday from work, at work deadline, all that sleepy and tired, all night code of rules, I hear the conversation of grandmother with granddaughter
Why is my uncle so upset?
Don’t look at him, he’s a narcissist!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117311
 14.08.2015
By the way, I understand very well why the Stark fell first. Because, imagine, all people are like people. This is normal Middle Ages. Wear a collar, drink wine, take a fortress, kill the enemy and n.a.s.r.a. in his skull. Targaryens are blood, shashlies! Barateons are not swords, so write. Lannister, we will pay you. The vineyard flows, the blood sheds, the b.a.b.s are naked and very naked, dragons, wolves, zombies, all the e.b.u.t.s.a, everyone has fun. And in the midst of all this, the Starks are sitting and shouting from the balcony like patties-killers - Vadik, Vadik, put on a hat, winter is near!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №117310
 14.08.2015
Listen, Serge, I can’t understand one thing. How did Mikhailich live up to his age with his sense of humor?
Wow, what happened to that?
In short, he spent the past weekend with him on the facade of Lech and invited two others, to repair the straw, to steam in the bowl, to burn meat, and to drink self-sufficiently. In general, it was repaired, steamed, burned, the same nights used a lot. Here Mikhailic and asked, you know, from what is the selfie? of the shit.
Oh no, I’m not myself! And what?
Well, they laugh, like Mikhalych, what do you think we "The Soldier Ivan Chonkin" don’t know? Two kilograms of sugar per kilogram?
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah He brought them to the summer kitchen, pulled them out, opened them and showed them. And in the bidon... Something red, brown pieces of characteristic shape, rings bubble. And the smell, let’s say directly, is not the ocean breeze... Leha grit, from it right there the whole self and flew out.
WOW, they didn’t go there?
XXX is not. Mikhalych ran from them for three hours through the gardens and spoke: "Mujikiya! It is from sheep! In the nature of turmeric! This is my grandfather’s recipe!"

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №117309
 14.08.2015
On the site of the weather settled Captain Evidence. There is a clarification in the forecast:
Careful - you may feel tired if you are outdoors for a long time and engage in physical work.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №117308
 14.08.2015
From the category "you will not invent"
I had the following conversation on Skype:

What problems do we have with the task at the moment?
I open the task, highlight my answer and copy, then insert Skype and send it immediately.
Violation of sexual function (delayed ejaculation, reduced potency)

because before that I read the sideways to one antidepressant and shared the most striking, in another skype, and apparently did not reach C.
The deadline of the task has increased :D

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №117307
 14.08.2015
XXX: I watched a McDack TV advertisement. Say, so far I am in the box office, but when I grow up I will be working as a big financier) Who will tell me what a professional is a big financier?

YYY: Well, in short, you arrange something like an accountant in some office and you start to actively stress with sweets and in five years - you are a big financier.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №117306
 14.08.2015
Spam has arrived to the mail "Do you want to quickly break the bag without investments?". It would be nothing, but the name of the sender of the Raskolnikov somehow made me think.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №117305
 14.08.2015
After reading the book, a thought settled in your head, and then what is your problem with asceticism?

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №117304
 14.08.2015
Publication of the "Culture"

by Konstantin Mzaareulov:
There was an article of some candidate of science who stated that the term goods fiction is Scientology fiction, that is, something very bad.
Cute newspaper

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №117303
 14.08.2015
Fans of the rings, are you adequate? If a man consciously goes to the left in the presence of a spouse (s), then the ring is for him - fi. Before "forgotten" I took it off and put it in my pocket. If a person consciously does not want leftist novels, even simply cohabiting and not having rings at all, he will refuse.
They are living people with their heads and the decision about betrayal is made by them, not the rings for them.
As little children, to God.
It is not rings that make man.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №117302
 14.08.2015
Everyone is running Wikipedia.
And I 5-7 years ago, when I met a girl, I told about myself some nonsense and I wrote them on Wikipedia in various articles. Give the girl a reference - Profit.
Now the publications go only after inspection?)

[ + 24 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №117301
 14.08.2015
> in the Netherlands. Third but the capital.

Khahaha, a man, the “third capital” of every city-millionaire. And Novosibirsk for its own - the third capital, and Krasnoyarsk, and Voronezh. Just outside of your city don’t talk about it – they’ll laugh.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №117300
 14.08.2015
Gia_manul: Like if your father still thinks you’re a demo version and a normal baby will soon be born.
Argont: In order for the second child to also need a psychiatrist, it can be said that he is just a backup copy of the first.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №117299
 14.08.2015
What is this new word "remove"? Reduction of something? Type - "help me ears"- for example?

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №117298
 14.08.2015
If your husband's mistress was really smart (well, not stupidly started a relationship with a married man, but just wanted a man-party to make romantic encounters, but without scattered socks, feeding with a sunburn and without waking up every morning next to someone's face), you would think that the mistress does not exist in nature, and the husband is faithful, and a swan!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117297
 14.08.2015
As the owner of the nine, I can say the following.
The bumper there is actually worn. Steel shell, covered with wood plastic. Fuck him to break.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
As a sofa psychologist and auto expert, I can say the following.
In the source, most likely, the author confused VAZ-2114 and VAZ-2109 (93). Because of poor knowledge of the game. The funny plastic buffer of the 14th is really easy to break off, he himself was a repeated witness to this.
And the bumper "nine" is actually hollowed. They can destroy enemies.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117296
 14.08.2015
Artem Kliatchkine (living in Belgium)

In the days, the girl, being in a mood hungry and angry, tried to arrange a scandal because of the fact that the pasta was squeezed not with parmesan, and the gran padano. You can’t tell them at all, but I said nonsense. Picture with oil: a broken European child scandals because of parmesan. My wife and I couldn’t stand it and started roasting, adding to the insult an insult.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №117295
 14.08.2015
All kinds of ransomware dresses, bouquets, photoshoots, restaurants, limousines in the overwhelming majority of cases are needed by a woman, and for a man this day - shake your teeth, open your wallet and smile boldly, so that your bride is pleasant.

All this stuff is needed by parents and relatives.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117294
 14.08.2015
Stargazer Upgrades Windows 10 to Windows 7

PS Basically, that’s all you can say about Windows 10.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №117293
 14.08.2015
Automated Testing D:
X: I will stumble
X: Write them a tueva huču test
x: And it turns out my tests are very bad: "They find bugs"
X: So they need to be turned off :D
X: And the bugs are good, they cannot be touched.
X: They are "expected"
X: I turned off my tests – I’m fired. When I was confused, they hired me at all.

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