bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №113172
 09.05.2015
Even white dance today is racism.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №113171
 09.05.2015
I was two meters tall, under a hundred pounds, unbarred for about two weeks, sat in the electric car. In front of the boy, on his maillot is written: "Smile if you want me." I am bored, I sit, I smile, and he is sweaty.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №113170
 09.05.2015
My husband is so aggressive driving!! And yours is so calm!! What do you give him?
I give him.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113169
 09.05.2015
And the girls, even the feelings of tact was not enough to stumble over the clothes.
_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
What’s wrong with jeans and shirts? Clothes for neutral plans. I, as a girl, would rather grieve over the one who went out for a street date, as if for a theatre or for a pathos club - it is like a clown, like a woman, in the midst of the day, dressed in a gray barley dress with a shalef and sprinkled a nork mantle on the first week of September.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №113168
 09.05.2015
Subaru has an emblem like a star.
___________________________________________

Some pleasures there.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113167
 09.05.2015
Madam, do you not know, at 35 years old, a man is like a sortter at the station: either busy or full of shit.
— — —
I love this phrase! Only in her age changes constantly: from 25 to 40 years.
And yes, usually after this phrase follows the logical conclusion that all are goats.
PS for some reason never heard this phrase from the mouth of a girl in a happy marriage.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №113166
 09.05.2015
>>>Ferral node with hub crack
He sees the nuts of fry...
ZMH! I thought HUB.
And the knot on the knot is shit!

One girl asked: "In what language are these poems?"

From a linguistic point of view, this pidgin is English, adapted to local pronunciation and grammar.

[ + 27 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №113165
 09.05.2015
Young man, if you are unable to hold your wife, why do you need her at all? The conventional vibrator and the stand are harder, and the endurance is greater, and it eats a couple or three batteries, which even the most hands-free hostess can get. No matter how cool, you are flying!
________
Artificial vagines have been on sale for a long time. Just like multivarks, dishwashers, washing machines and iRobot vacuum cleaners.
So the women who want them to be kept are just as in the flight.
Have you tried to consider marriage as an equal partnership between two independent and independent people? And not how "sex and cooking/cleaning in exchange for content"?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №113164
 09.05.2015
A friend told me.
His daughter was sick in a kindergarten. I had to go from work to bring him to the hospital, on the way to go for my wife. There is no place to park near your wife’s job – there is no place for an apple to fall. He stood up on the "accident" second row (!) Under the sign "Stop is prohibited". And there, with a pleasant sight, the haishniks rush to him (what a day!) is
Good morning Sergeant Petrov. We violate?!...
Oh, I am waiting for you! A friend went to a w-bank.
In the sense...?
- Well, here is a bit of shit (showing an old scratch on the bumper) and washed. I called 02 and have been waiting for two hours.
No, it’s not with us...
Why not to you??? Are you a selection group?
No, it is not us. Wait for your crew.
You can form too! Should I wait three hours?
No No No No No No No No No No No No! They jump into a patrol car and get rid of it quickly.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №113163
 09.05.2015
I kiss my best friend. It sounds so happy to me: "Today is someone’s birthday"! "Aga" - I say, "somebody has it, and I have it tomorrow".
"Crazy!" and darts in the tube )))) 24 years of familiarity

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113162
 09.05.2015
The mouse driver is 120Mb. Where does this world go?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №113161
 09.05.2015
To this author: Of course, the son answers, this is the mark of the helmet.
And this: Our teacher has a simple phone, and she has an iPhone.

Your quotes only indicate how you are raising your children. You do not beat.)
Not working with his son.
The second priority is only iPhones and other henna.
Children are copying you.)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113160
 09.05.2015
Title of article:
"Smart Cat Toilet (for just $100)"
The comments:
All 100 dollars? can not be.
Can Google Analytics connect to it?
I look forward to such toilets for people with social functions. A new era for Twitter.
For Instagram, it’s a big deal!

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №113159
 09.05.2015
here here :
-
I work as a leading programmer, a good specialist, I earn well - and I have to say that for me both of the above professions - a huge plus: (1) the grandmother works and is not ashamed that it is not an office parasite, - such, you know, a rarity in our days; (2) and will be able to take care of her own child better than many.
----------
There is no need for a babysitter or a sanitary - their salary is not enough even to eat, and there are many wishes - a dress, a ring, etc. Do you need content? Prostitutes are cheaper.
— — —
Everyone is looking for their own, one - a beloved woman, the other - a woman for the night.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113158
 09.05.2015
Vampire Alkas tried to exchange an empty bowl in the morge.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №113157
 09.05.2015
How can you work in such conditions?
colleagues obtained in the innet a picture of "how would you be called in the Indians" by the first letters of your name and surname.

Our leadership has succeeded:
Free mammoth
Unstoppable cowardly
And a terrible burnout!
A team of superheroes
:D

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №113156
 09.05.2015
News of the new DirectX, allowing to render photo-realistic models of characters in real time. The most popular comment:

"A kinescope from such an image will not sit down?"

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №113155
 09.05.2015
The cleaner is wiped!
Somebody poured coffee, she stood cleaning up, and said, “Here’s the hand-picked.”
She gathered everything in the sink, from the sink she tries to pour out into the garbage, half of her flies back to the floor. She grit: "and I’m the same handjob"

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №113154
 09.05.2015
What do you think is closing up with the pixel blur in the XXX film? I did not guess. Close the cover and DVD label that the heroine wants to see as a prelude. That’s what the harsh western copywriting means!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №113153
 08.05.2015
If I want to exchange bitcoins, where should I go?
Chapter 3: Hello to you! We do not exchange Bitcoins.
Hasan: Yup I can see that, but do you know any site that can do that?
Operator No. 3: I don’t know such websites
Hasan: Okay Thank you, your site is nice.
Chapter 3: All the good!

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