bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №85987
 23.08.2013
CbI4 (17:16:06 22/08/2013)
My grandfather is 83 or 84. Shash burned him for watching porn at work :D
CbI4 (17:16:26 22/08/2013)
with such a serious fucking look.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85986
 23.08.2013
xxx[22.08.2013 4:28:13]: How! Why don’t we sleep so early? The work?
YYY (Programming Engineer): No and insomnia.
YYY: I argue and argue, and I can’t sleep. Okay, I’d better sit down.
xxx count the sheep
YYY: It is useless.
XXX Why?
YYY: I tried it once.
YYY: Lie down, close my eyes, imagine such an idyllic picture: grass, green grass, shed, sheep... I lie, I think...
XXX: and...
YYY: At midnight, he thought about the algorithm of automatic counting the number of sheep in the picture of the grassland.
Xxx:...
XX: You are really dumb.

[ + 9 - ] Comment quote №85985
 23.08.2013
>-------
There are 4 months left until the end of this year. The process of becoming a mother has already begun, as far as I understand. From here it is understandable such a rush to become another wife.

Where do you get so much anger? She wants to get pregnant from her beloved husband, not to give birth this year. Mothers are called pregnant women. So why do you have all the ugliness from all the gaps, right? Shame on you, gentlemen.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №85984
 23.08.2013
Technical, it is when you try to draw a violin key, and it still comes out only integrals on a closed contour.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №85983
 23.08.2013
It was a joke...
I know (I know)
M - I understand
I represent you (:
I am a Nikon.

[ + 28 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85982
 23.08.2013
To die for Russia is now accepted in London.

[ + 63 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85981
 23.08.2013
As a child, when we had a lot of guests, I liked to add a drop of iodine to tea without notice. The color and taste of the tea from this do not change, but if you soak the bulk in it, it will be painted in a piercing blue color. Children at the adult table are given little attention. This is how you sit, make a bite, bite, chew off... Gradually all the conversations stop, no one eats or talks anymore – everyone looks with horror...

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №85980
 23.08.2013
Roskomnadzor has published a full list of “pirate” sites. thank you!! I’m tired of looking for them all over the internet.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №85979
 23.08.2013
xxx:... and then Java will disappear as a class.
What a subtle irony...

[ + 27 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85978
 23.08.2013
Hello, I am getting married
yyy: I hope "I marry" is this not a verb?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85977
 23.08.2013
I am a subscriber of the Green Operator. The days needed to buy 2 room, ordered through the online store, calls the mobile girl, clarify the details. The connection is terrible, everything breaks, in the middle of the conversation, the connection is interrupted. After half an hour, he calls back, we finish... Finally he says to me: "And give me, please, another phone number. You have a very bad relationship".
and self-critical.

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85976
 23.08.2013
Dear WoT's and sheep!
Where can I see your costume?

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №85975
 23.08.2013
They say, “He had two miserable marriages.” Thus e. If people are separated without having time to ruin each other's lives, it is a "failure".

But if they bite each other’s brain and spinal cord and continue to do so, the marriage is successful!

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85974
 23.08.2013
No man, you don’t understand...
When you go out, and your trousers are really wet from the sweat on your ass, on your trousers, and it is really visible, but you no longer have the strength to be ashamed - you just fuck.
When you go out and think that the most brutal slam on the prodigy was just a child’s fun compared to this...
When you go out, and you, instead of boxers, have strings, and you are not quite sure that you have not lost your anal virginity along the way...
Then you can think you know the metro.
This is our summer!" (c)

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №85973
 23.08.2013
Mr. proud > In that month for the car loan paid... It turns out my salary can live! =) is
J@h > Ah, and when you close the mortgage, you will find that you have a high salary =)

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №85972
 23.08.2013
Sometimes, when I forget the player at home, I witness very funny dialogues in the subway (the author’s slogan is preserved): a boy and a girl of 20 years are driving next to me, a boy demonstrates a student ticket and says proudly:
I studied at Baumanka before.
Why are you not studying now?
Boy (in his voice heard all the sadness and injustice of the world): -Do you know what to do there??? I have to go to the class every day!!! to

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №85971
 23.08.2013
A friend from his father on the phone:

Father: Hi son, what are you doing?
Yes, the chicken is hot.
Father: Well, let’s heat your chicken. A cute one? How are they called?
Friend O_O

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №85970
 23.08.2013
Below the window is a children’s playground. A deaf sound of blowing, a scream, and then the voice: "Bingo!!and "

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №85969
 23.08.2013
I work as a sysadmin in a small company. The manager asked her to connect the headphones to the computer. I pulled, sat under the table, connected. At this time, the Internet (a failure with the provider) falls slowly, and, accordingly, the mail ceases to work. People start to be scared:
The SMTP server does not respond, what to do?
I sit under the table, thinking about what might have happened, I’m silent.
Girl, fun – Don’t touch him, he’s hiding! xd

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85968
 23.08.2013
Friendship is when you don’t post a photo because it didn’t work well.

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