bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79167
 24.03.2013
Conference on 3D graphics
<suomi> docks are read only by losers and miserables. True samurai 3D graphics always model by naïveté! This glass looks like a straw goblin.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №79166
 24.03.2013
xxx: reminded me when I was still working at Procter & Gamble.
Report of the Marketer:
We are launching a new shampoo.
- Focus groups most liked the phrase "contains mineral oils"!
That’s why we’re going to write on shampoos.
Although this is strange, because the only mineral oil is processed oil.
But in the shops and buyers do not have to say this.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №79165
 24.03.2013
xxx guys guys!! Explain to me, is Holland and the Netherlands the same?
YYYYYY: Yes
xxx thank you! I have been on Wikipedia!!! How useful it is to look at the beetle! So much new!
yyy: It’s really useful to teach geography at school, sorry.
xxx: You will be pleasantly surprised, but in school and even in the university of geography I had a hard five...))))) Well it is impossible to know everything in the world!)))))))))))
Yyy: I would burn the diploma and diploma in your place))

[ + 24 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79164
 24.03.2013
One day a godmother fell so in love with her godmother that she could not eat him.
And then all the godmills knew about it.
And, like the Inquisition, they started hunting for her.
And she ran with her beloved into the woods, becoming an exorcist forever for her people.
And the godmother is so straight and does not know what to do... he likes her, he seems to have accepted the fact that he is eaten, but here is life...
And he’s like he doesn’t know what to do, like he’s confused.
He is very sad and sad for her.
He still continues to be with her, to run with her, to take care of her, but in shock of what is happening. Do you know how bad she is?
She loves him very much, her natural instinct wants to bite his head, her teeth straight, but she can’t.
She loves very much.
She is in panic, she is very scared.
She had never felt so horrible before. And she is conscientious for involving her beloved in these problems.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №79163
 24.03.2013
There was a conversation with an unfamiliar young woman:

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Sorry, we do not know, I have a question, Do you rent an apartment in Tomsk?
I am filming
Q: Please tell me, you can’t take two girls for two weeks?
I am: Oh no.
The people have gone!! Anything can happen with you too. Good luck to you!! to

Here I am protecting. How polite people can be when they need something. And where do the grandmothers come from, convinced that the whole world owes them.

[ + 53 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79162
 23.03.2013
(16:54:02) feodor: I look at the stitch in the window
(16:54:22) feodor: parked guy on sushi some small
(16:54:47) feodor: closed the car (blinked with the signal)
(16:54:59) feodor: stood up, thought
(16:55:17) feodor: opened the car (blinked with the signal)
(16:55:34) feodor: took a wife with a child out of the car

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79161
 23.03.2013
Starman
How can you believe in a Flying Pasta Monster? That I think is not true, since no one has seen it, do you have evidence of its existence?
Eddygo
I bought a package of his relics yesterday from "Macfa"

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №79160
 23.03.2013
Welcome to Alcoholics!
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYY What is this? They sat yesterday.
XXX is normal? Do you remember we bought the Bank of Paste under the water?
YYYYYY: Yes It was a delicious pastry.
XXX: And a bowl of viscose to your cat.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYY closer to the case.
So the pastry ate the cat!
YYYYYYYYYYYYY...

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №79159
 23.03.2013
Your train is gone!! to
I didn’t take the tickets.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №79158
 23.03.2013
All cells are divided into those that are divided and those that are not divided. All cells are divided. O_O

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №79157
 23.03.2013
From VKontakte:

Indulgence †
My boyfriend rubbed my breasts in public places, saying:"We walked into the woods for nuts, got into the pit, pressed BIP-BIP on the hose". At the last word, twice painfully compressing my chest.
I’m ashamed of him, but I can’t give up a fool.

Yury Ermakov
And you say in response:

I was on a train, choking.
I was driving from north to south.
The boy was eblan-
There was a stop-kran on the way.

And even for his shit!

[ + 41 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79156
 23.03.2013
In 1914, Sergeant Henry Tendey encountered a German soldier on a neutral strip. The soldier was wounded and so exhausted that he did not even try to lift his rifle. Tendy regretted him and did not shoot. The German gratefully cried and cried to his own. This German was Adolf Hitler.

XXX: Another proof that people should be killed at every opportunity

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №79155
 23.03.2013
Anyone, bring this foolish snowmen - December 113 already...

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №79154
 23.03.2013
Well, who was there a couple of years ago shouting that soon children will be able to show the winter only in pictures?? to

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79153
 23.03.2013
C of Lepra:

XX: You guys, don’t you know how kidney stones are crushed non-operatively?

YYY: Yes everyone knows. The best nurses. She blows the patient in the fox and in a minute he splashes the stones out of his mouth. Sometimes with the kidneys.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №79152
 23.03.2013
Read the news: "In Mariupol unknown people stole a construction crane."
I can’t sleep, I wonder why.
I read the news to the end and generally hurt "Remember, in Lviv on March 1, unknown people stole the tram and robbed a building on it."
People know how to have fun!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №79151
 23.03.2013
X: I had tamagochi when I grew up, I left
They died of old age.
X: No, I have left
Johnny, we took our old dog to the farm, there it will be full of space and fresh air.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №79150
 23.03.2013
Tagged with: rin_cheese

Somewhere there really is a company that extends the genitals. Well, who will believe her now?
Some site is still looking for connections with its millionth visitor - to give the main prize, a bicycle or a rolls-roye. And he reluctantly closes the windows and ignores the letters to the mail as well.
One out of thousands of diets actually allows you to lose thirty pounds in two weeks, while not even necessarily limited to wheat, algae and spring sun.
One-on-a-million washing powder really removes dirt, wine, fat traces, virgin blood, karmic spots and everything else from the laundry forever. This is not TED, don’t hope.
Well, after all, one of these sect simply has to know the truth about who we are, why we are, where to get meaning and fresh socks. Somehow it is logical – that the most secret is understood by a small group of people, forty or two hundred, and not a religion with a fan club on a half-planet. You won’t get up there.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №79149
 23.03.2013
The stupid Americans decided to execute the surgeon for an unfulfilled forecast.
Shit, if we executed everyone whose forecast did not come true, we would not have a government.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №79148
 23.03.2013
XX: Do you want an example of positive thinking?
I saw a bomb in the subway. With the book "How to success in life"

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna